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(5 Posts)
oggieoggie Fri 30-Dec-16 17:52:24

I need some advice I'm still angry from Christmas!
Having recently had a baby and being a stepmum to DSS who is 18 we also have my DD 19 and my Ds 12 so we have a mixed bag of ages!
My DSS (18) I could cry for him his own mother did not send him anything not even a card for Christmas!
Since splitting with DH Some 8 years ago she has had 4 more kids.
Originally when she left after an affair she had she took DSS with her until her hew husband got fed up of him because he had issues surrounding his parents divorce.
Which was when he came back to live with us.
This woman is nasty vile evil she gives DSS a hard time because he could not presents for his new siblings (he's 18 ffs)
But this year for Xmas he didn't get anything, even her and parents left him out.
Is it me? I mean do you still buy presents after 18?
I do.
What would you do? DH won't say anything he says if he does he's playing into her hands

fallenempires Fri 30-Dec-16 19:15:43

That's shocking the poor lad!
Of course he should have been given something it doesn't have to be an extravagant something either.
DSS is of an age where he can clearly work things out for himself & sadly he has probably come to terms with the fact that he hasn't much of a relationship if any with his DM.
I agree with your DH tbh that it would be playing into her hands,she sounds as tho she thrives on the drama!
All you both can do is continue as you are doing in providing him with a loving & supportive home.

CannotEvenDeal Fri 30-Dec-16 19:31:42

I wouldn't say anything either tbh. My dss is 12 and hasn't had any birthday or Christmas gifts since he was about 7 from dh's exw. I've learnt that being angry on dss' behalf because I love him so much is a total waste of energy.

How much contact do dss and exw have?

oggieoggie Fri 30-Dec-16 20:14:08

Contact has been very off and on really.
She's vile and I mean vile she never ever has paid a penny towards him or even offered.
Towards his therapy etc for his 18th she sent him a lighter.
It's not about the money to me but clearly she has it because her other kids never go without etc

CannotEvenDeal Sun 01-Jan-17 23:04:22

I know what you mean about the money thing. We are comfortable without the maintenance thar she never pays anyway but I find it a bit hmm that she has money for holidays and extending renovation work but no money to send a card.. or a free whatsapp.

Thank goodness she's abroad tbh

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