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DSD will not communicate with her dad at all

(1 Post)
MycatsaPirate Thu 29-Sep-16 09:31:24

This has been ongoing since January. She will not answer his calls. She will not speak to him at all. When we see her once a week at an activity we take my dd's to, she barely acknowledges him and only speaks if he goes over to her.

I am going into hospital in two weeks for major surgery and as Dp is working full time, teen is working full time until Uni starts in February and DD2 has ASD, I am trying my best to get the vast majority of the Christmas shopping done before I go in.

DSD1 has been great. She lives with her bf and has said don't buy anything but I insisted so she asked for money towards a TV. That's fine. Easy enough and I'll buy them some snuggle blankets as well.

DSD2 will not answer Dp's calls. She dismissed his call last night and then sent a text saying her phone is broken and she can't use it to make calls (it's an iphone she got for Christmas last year). So dp asks for the landline number so they can talk. No answer, no reply. Nothing.

He's reluctant to just text and say what do you want for Christmas. This is what happened on her birthday, he sent a text, she sent a list back, we bought her presents and they were passed on at the activity she goes to.

Mostly she ignores calls or texts from him but I'm guessing in the run up to Christmas she doesn't want to miss out on presents so is prepared to have a text conversation. I'm so fucking annoyed at her for treating her dad like this.

She's 13. She last stayed here for four days just after Christmas last year. We bought her everything she asked for and more and she opened her stuff, put it into a pile and just muttered 'thanks' and never looked at it again. I have no idea if she even uses any of it.

I'm starting to feel quite resentful. She makes no effort with her dad. He has tried calling often, not calling so often, emailing her mum (mum responded ages ago saying she would talk to DD and then nothing). It's like this wall has come down and she's decided to not bother at all.

He's a good dad. He used to spend time talking to her, taking her out, listening to her. He would take her to parties, sleepovers, visits with friends. He wasn't a shit dad who ignored her. If anything he was more Disney. The last visit was the first time he'd seen her in months. She wanted to spend most of it sleeping over at her friends. Dp, for once, put his foot down and said no as he hadn't had any time with her and she went ballistic, refused to come back to ours. He had to go and pick her up from the friends house at 9pm.

I'm not even sure what I want from this, I'm just fed up with her behaving like this. She's cut off her older sister as well (same dad, different mum), older sister doesn't even have her phone number any more as DSD changed it. Last time they spoke it was one word answers. DSD1 is a lovely girl (nearly 21) and there was no malice there at all.

I just don't know what on earth dp can do to fix this. And why the fuck I am worrying about what to get a 13 year old who really doesn't give a fuck about her dad.

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