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Contact for teenagers

(7 Posts)
pinkhorse Mon 15-Feb-16 15:36:18

I am not technically a step mum but I have been with my bf for a year and he has lived with me for about 6 months. I have a 6 year old DS and he has a 14 year old DD and an 18 year old DS.
I was just wondering what you do with your teenage step children? On my bf's weekends (he has them EOW) we struggle to think of things to do with them. At this age they don't want to do 'family' stuff do they? They understandably don't want to join in things like soft play or zoo trips etc that my DS likes.
We don't live near DSS or DSD friends so they can't see them without us giving them lifts then that surely defeats the point of contact weekends doesnt it?
Any ideas welcome!

Heavens2Betsy Mon 15-Feb-16 15:44:06

Our dc range from 11-16 and we take them out quite a lot.
We go out to the cinema or for a meal sometimes or just into town. In the summer they still like going to the beach or to the park (as long as their is a football pitch!) but a lot of the time they are happy just to chill out at home watching films or gaming.
Don't try to hard to make all their time with you 'entertaining'. They need to be able to fit in with your family dynamic and if that means not going out they should be able to amuse themselves.

Unnerved Mon 15-Feb-16 15:46:17

Theme park,bowling etc
Try doing activities catered to their age.

cosytoaster Mon 15-Feb-16 15:54:33

I don't think you have to do 'activities' with them really. when my teens go to their dad's and his partner's they just treat it as a second home, so just relax, watch TV, walk the dog, do some homework etc.

Bluelilies Mon 15-Feb-16 15:57:23

A lot of the time we just leave them to it and they play on computers or go on social media, watch youtube or chat to each other. Other times a mixture of:
- watching movies or TV series that we all watch together
- cooking, or getting them to cook
- board games
- Ocassonal family outings or walks, but these don't go down well generally unless they involve a theme park (maybe once a year)
- helping with homework
- chatting about school, life plans, exams, A level choices, etc, etc
- trips out to the cinima or bowling, and/or a meal out

CalicoBlue Mon 15-Feb-16 17:01:42

When my DD (15) goes to her fathers, she just relaxes, they rarely go out. I think they watch films and play on social media. He still takes her to her activities as we live close by. Sometimes she goes off to see her friends.

DS (18) has not bothered with 'contact' for the past two years and just goes and sees his father when he feels like it. Not as often as contact arrangements are.

pinkhorse Tue 16-Feb-16 07:04:16

Thank you for the ideas. Its difficult at the minute as they don't have bedrooms at ours ( we are moving soon) so they have to spend the whole time sitting on the sofa which can't be much fun!

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