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Step-parenting

Update

6 replies

CantWaitForWarmWeather · 21/01/2016 13:14

I posted a couple of days ago about dsd's mum asking if I could pick dsd up from school for her due to her wanting to increase her hours at work.

Well I just wanted to give an update on the situation.
Well Dsd's mum has decided to change her mind about her new hours.

She's ok with me not agreeing to picking dsd up. She didn't kick off and DP explained my reasons. She knew it was big ask, but she was just testing the waters a bit. You never know if you don't ask and all that.

Her mum can't find anyone else to pick dsd up for her, and ASC is full. Secretly she might be a bit peeved at me, I don't know, but deep down she knows it was asking a lot of me. Loads of parents find themselves in the same boat wrt childcare and have to adjust their hours around their children. I will have to do the same thing with my children when I go back to work.

She knows I'm here if she needs me for an emergency or if she needs to go to an appointment and she tells me in advance.

I'm just glad I put my foot down for once and haven't got myself in to a situation that is hard to get out of, and where resentment was a risk. Considering how much better things have been, I didn't want anything to spoil that. :)

Thank you for the supportive responses the other day.

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Petal02 · 21/01/2016 13:16

That's good result for you OP - what a relief!

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CantWaitForWarmWeather · 21/01/2016 14:20

It is really. And maybe when dsd can walk home on her own when she's a bit older, her mum could look at increasing her hours then. When I was 11 I used to walk home on my own and be alone at home until about 5ish when my dad came home from work. And that carried on right through secondary school.

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swingofthings · 21/01/2016 17:54

That's great news and you did the right thing. After all, if you are going back to work, how would you have been able to sustain your help? Things would have been much worse if she'd got used to relying on your help to then having it all taken away anyway.

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Wdigin2this · 25/01/2016 11:46

Good for you, it can't have been easy to say no, but you did the right thing! I wish I'd said no to a few more things years ago....but I'm doing it now!