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Does anyone know of a Step Parent Support Group or counsellor?

(7 Posts)
evilstepmotheruk Sat 15-Nov-14 13:48:56

I can't stand my step-daughter of 9 years and it is getting worse. I feel like I have misplaced anger and don't know how to deal with it. A lot of people are quick to judge and not offer advice that's useful. I don't want to hate her. I just don't know how to stop my negative feelings. I'd like to find a support group or counsellor that specialises in step-parenting. Can anyone make a recommendation? I'm in south west London. Thank you!

RedPoppyRed Sat 15-Nov-14 14:48:36

Hi OP

I don't know of any specific groups but maybe asking your GP for advice and support would be a good place to start.

I hope you find the help you need and can have some sort of relationship with your DSD.

thebluehen Sat 15-Nov-14 15:00:12

http://www.happysteps.co.uk/Pages/aboutus.aspx

Lisa Doodson runs step parenting workshops near to you and one to one sessions at a london university.

I've done both. She's had personal experience of being a step mum and has done extensive research.

Might he helpful?

HeadDoctor Sat 15-Nov-14 19:43:16

This book is expensive but cheaper than therapy. I found it really helpful.

evilstepmotheruk Sun 16-Nov-14 12:54:58

Thank you both so much. I feel so horrible and am at the point I can't see a solution sad Why is it so easy to love everyone else's child but my own stepdaughter. It makes me very sad. But at the same time my partners need to make every second weekend a fun-fair is exhausting and unnecessary. I feel like nothing on those weekends sad

Thanks for guidance x

Vvvoom Sun 16-Nov-14 19:14:24

Try stepinasap.co.uk

Claire Asherson Bartram. She does counselling (London) and also workshops exploring step parenting.

HadleyHemingway Mon 17-Nov-14 12:56:08

I have a step daughter and have been her step mum for four years.

In my experience, in this situation, any negative feelings felt towards the child are nearly always to do with the behaviour of the DP.

You saying that you feel like 'nothing' on the weekends your DP has his DD is the key to all this.

There is no better or faster way to seed and nurture resentment than dropping your partner like a hot potato in order to Disney parent a 'golden child'.

It really fucks up the dynamics.

You feel like a second best piece of crap. Your DSD is put on a pedestal and given too much power, which she can't handle at such a young age.

But it's all down to your partner's behaviour, not your DSD's.

Have you told him how he makes you feel?

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