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Wills and stepchild

(62 Posts)
apachepony Sat 01-Feb-14 15:17:43

I know this topic has been done before, but just interested in your opinions as dh and I had an argument about this... about to buy a house, with over a third of the purchase price being cash coming from my own savings over 10 years and a gift from my parents - how should the will split things between dsd and our joint child? House being only asset, and dsd likely to inherit an amount at least two thirds the value of the house from her mother's side?

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 15:31:52

Don't know but interested to find out!

JoinYourPlayfellows Sat 01-Feb-14 15:35:38

I would say that your half of the house should go to your DD and your husband's half of the house should be split between his two children.

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 15:37:31

Agree in part, but shouldn't his half be split between all his children, i.e. including the DD he has with the OP? Otherwise not fair: why isn't he leaving one of his daughters anything?

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 15:39:40

Her half to their shared DD and his half only to other kids is tantamount to him saying he doesn't need to provide for his youngest DD as he knows her mum will, whereas he'd never apply that logic to the other two.

Also if you have it set up that his half makes no allowance for your DD, if you die first, then your half goes to him, then that goes to the DSCs, she will get nothing.

Another thing to consider is if you die then house is sold and your part is kept in trust for her, rather than going to your DH with danger it will get absorbed by DSCs.

JoinYourPlayfellows Sat 01-Feb-14 15:43:01

shouldn't his half be split between all his children, i.e. including the DD he has with the OP?

That's what I said confused

When I said "all his children", I mean, ALL of them including the child he has with the OP.

JoinYourPlayfellows Sat 01-Feb-14 15:43:54

Oh no, I said "his two children", which I believe is his total number of children - OP's SD and DD.

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 15:43:55

Ah, ok, sorry! I thought he had two others. I was reading two threads at once! Apologies cake

JoinYourPlayfellows Sat 01-Feb-14 15:44:47

No worries smile

Don't be giving me cake! grin

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 15:44:51

I agree with JoinYourPlayfellows
This stuff is important. And also I think it's irrelevant what they're going to get from their mum. Even if nothing, it should still be divvied like this.

needaholidaynow Sat 01-Feb-14 15:49:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HermioneWeasley Sat 01-Feb-14 15:53:15

Agree - your half goes to your child (and future children) and his half gets divided between all his kids equally.

Chewbecca Sat 01-Feb-14 15:53:54

Similar situation here and DH & I agree with playfellows too

Agree this does not acknowledge your initial bigger contribution (I put more into our first house too), but, hoping there are many years ahead of you both I figure by the time it comes to deal with these things, I'm happy that the house is truly joint and therefore DH can divvy his 'half' equally between his children without me thinking he's given some of 'my' share to 'his' children. In fact, although my initial contribution to our house was bigger, his annual contribution since then has been bigger so I'm sure we must be quits by now.

If you are concerned there are not many years ahead of you confused then you need to find a way of ring-fencing your initial contribution but that doesn't bode well really.

Chewbecca Sat 01-Feb-14 15:55:06

What is your stance & your DH's OP? what were you each proposing that caused the row?

apachepony Sat 01-Feb-14 15:56:06

Dh wants it split equally, which I don't think is fair particularly given the assets will all have come from me. It's putting me off putting my parents' gift into a house, don't know if that's silly!

TamerB Sat 01-Feb-14 15:58:22

If I was the father I couldn't contemplate a situation where my 2 children were not treated equally.

JoinYourPlayfellows Sat 01-Feb-14 15:59:36

No, it's not silly.

You are bringing a LOT to the table here.

This is a house he wouldn't be getting to live in if it wasn't for your money.

Why should your parents give so much money to his daughter?

JoinYourPlayfellows Sat 01-Feb-14 16:01:00

If I was the father I couldn't contemplate a situation where my 2 children were not treated equally.

His children ARE being treated equally. By HIM.

The OP only has one daughter.

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 16:02:08

Exactly. Each child has two parents who must prioritise their own kids.

apachepony Sat 01-Feb-14 16:02:19

I would favour the approach most people are suggesting (with possibly more if we both die before ds is 18 - god forbid - as he would then be an orphan whereas dsd would have her mum and the proceeds of a life insurance policy, also this would reflect my greater initial contribution)

needaholidaynow Sat 01-Feb-14 16:02:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

croquet Sat 01-Feb-14 16:04:04

but needaholiday are your DSs also your DPs?

Ziplex Sat 01-Feb-14 16:04:26

We have split it fairly between our children regardless of any other inheritance!
My parents split and because my Mother owns a house I have been cut out of my Father/ SM will, my brother ( their child) inherits all, what they don't know ( but I do) is that Mother has left it all to her nephew.
I can't and won't let my husbands and my children be treated any different and I struggle as a step parent.

LtEveDallas Sat 01-Feb-14 16:06:34

We've just done this. Over half of the equity in our new house comes from me. I have no issue in using it for 'my' family, but want to make sure that if anything happens to me, my DD is protected.

Our house is 'split' 50/50 between me and DH.

My 50% goes to DD alone. DH's 50% is split between DD and DSD. So in essence DD would get 75% of it and DSD 25% of it were we both to die. DSD will also get 100% of her mothers assets (which DH helped to build but has no claim on).

We've also made arrangements should we both die before DD is an adult (DSD already is)

needaholidaynow Sat 01-Feb-14 16:06:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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