Am I being silly?

[Beccawoo]

My 2nd Christmas since XH left, last year I had my DCs fir Christmas lunch and Boxing Day and spent it at my parents. This year, I had them Christmas Eve and Christmas morn till 11am so did pressies etc before their dad picked them up.

I gave then spent Xmas day with DP and dss and dp's family. DP and I are now back home for the eve with dss staying. DP is annoyed I have put my DCs presents away so dss can't play with them. I know they aren't here and wouldn't know, but i don't really want to watch dss playing with their new toys for the next 2 days that they've only had about an hour to play with themselves. Am i being really silly about it?! Just feels really wrong to me. Dp's response was, oh, are we going to hide away dss's new stuff when he goes at the weekend and they come back so they can't play with it? I said he could do that if he wanted, but it isn't exactly the same as he will have had 3 days playing with them anyway. And the point is, it's grad enough having Christmas without DCs without having to watch dss play with all the things I bought them :0(

[MirandaWest]

I'm not in the same situation as my bfs DS is much older than my DC but I don't see how you are being unreasonable at all - they're your children's presents and I don't think someone else should be playing with them.

What does he normally play with when he's at your house? I can see he might play with some of your DCs toys but not their new ones.

[KringleCandleLover]

I wouldn't allow it.

Put them away and keep them there. It is not fair that another child gets to play with dcs toys when they have barely removed them from the boxes.

What if, by accident, something gets broken or pieces go missing?

[fivegolddeblooms]

No experience but you don't sound U to me xx

[StillNoFuckingEyeDeer]

I don't think you're being silly. Presumably you wouldn't allow one of your DC to play with their siblings brand new toy before they had a chance to play with it either?

[coppertop]

I don't think you're being silly.

I'm all for encouraging my children to share, but not their very newest things. I certainly wouldn't be handing their newest things to a sibling (step or otherwise) when they'd barely had a chance to use the item themselves.

[Beccawoo]

Thanks all, good to know I'm not being unreasonable. My DS and my dss are very close in age so tend to play with the same things, DS does play with dss toys when he isn't here and likewise the other way around. I just feel this is different as they are new. Will stand by how I feel then! Thanks. Hope everyone has had great Christmases!

[AnitaBlake]

I encourage DSD to keep things she considers important on her bed, that way we know which toys she's happy to share when she's not with us. I think it's important that kids have control and responsibility for their things.

While I think sharing is very important, there is an element of give and take there, which it isn't in this case. If your DS had offered his toys or deliberately left them in communal toy boxes etc., then fair enough, but I wouldn't let my DDs play with DSDs new toys without her consent xxx

[pictish]

Definitely NOT bu.
I wouldn't let any of my lot play with their sibling's new toys in their absence.

[Whereisegg]

we have a rule here that you don't have to share at all for a week after new things come out of the box, not after they have been given.
after that sharing is encouraged as normal but only I only ever get involved if one dc wants to share siblings things but won't reciprocate.

I'm in my thirties and would be annoyed if someone used my new stuff before me

[purpleroses]

We don't allow either my DC or the DSC to play with the toys of the ones who aren't around unless they've asked them first.

[Beccawoo]

Thanks. They'll all be here together on Saturday so I've told dss he can show my ds his new toys they, and that ds will do the same. If DP feels the need to hide dss toys for a night then that's up to him!

[Kaluki]

YANBU or silly at all.
Your DP is being unfair and ridiculous.