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Hi everyone and I'm so glad I finally found this thread

(6 Posts)
LittleOwlie Sat 16-Nov-13 00:45:21

Hi everyone,

I just thought I'd come and introduce myself, as I'm semi new to MN.

I'm so glad and gutted to find this thread as my previous experience of MN was just on the conception threads and I never thought to seek help and advise here after my whole 'conception' stuff turned to disaster.

I joined MN about 7 years ago when I just got married and started thinking about having children. Unfortunately things weren't to be, my ExDH and I had major issues around conceiving and he was found to be the problem (no blame...things just happen). By the time we got our letter that we were moving to the next steps for IVF, I'd received my first letter telling me of our divorce. I don't begrudge, as things happen for a reason and if we couldn't communicate through issues with fertility then probably a blessing we split without kids involved.

I then met someone who had split from his wife and had three kids. When he split they were DD 6, DS4 and DD1. We waited 18 months for me to be introduced. This was due to many reasons. I was made known to his ex after we'd dated a couple of months...but we wanted to make sure things were okay for the kids before any introduction. I should add I met and started dating him 4 months after they separated. And things were still very raw.

Their mum decided to move away around 400 miles before I met the kids and then, due to financial reason DP moved another 200 miles to live in my home. At that point I met is DC. Since then, his ex has moved with the kids another 200miles away. We have them for pretty much all the holidays. Which is lovely and hard some times.

Myself and DP (I have to refer to him as such as his divorce took 4 years to process) don't have any kids apart from his...but we are just deciding to take take the next step and try for our own.

It's been very tough to deal with at times. My DPs ex hasn't been easy for me to cope with, often being vindictive and horrid to me and she's done some fairly shocking things where the break down of their marriage has been concerned and the courts and police have had to be involved. Suffice to say, I wish I known about this thread sooner and sought advice.

Nothing else to add, except...I'm glad to have found this thread, now we trying and I hope to gain a lot of wisdom and advise from you all.



Petal02 Sat 16-Nov-13 09:06:14

Good morning and nice to meet you! There are some great ladies who post here.

louby44 Sat 16-Nov-13 09:11:17

Hi you sound very lovely. You've been really considerate to all parties involved and have obviously had your DSC best interests at heart.

I've never understood the ex people (mums/dads) who are vindictive and horrible! I split with my ex-H in 2006 and we've had a decent amicable relationship since. We both want the best for our 2 DS and are united on that front.

I met my DP in 2008 and we have 4 kids between us (him 2 DD age 14 & 16 and me 2 DS aged 14 & 10). Our kids all get on well but his DD only visit sporadically now.

We've had our ups and downs and his ex-wifes partner stirred up a lot of unneccesary turmoil but time mellows people and things are much better now.

Welcome to the StepParenting - it's a great forum!

TheMumsRush Sat 16-Nov-13 10:49:22

Oooo! I'm loving all the new "faces" smile hello and welcome! It's sounds like you are a very nice lady trying to make a nice life for all involved smile we have the dsc this weekend so can't chat long.

LittleOwlie Mon 18-Nov-13 07:43:57

Hi Petal, Louby and MumsRush,

Thanks so much for your warm welcome!

LO smile

benid Mon 18-Nov-13 17:08:28

Can i say hello too? I've just posted on another thread on this board + think it was only my 2nd post on stepparenting.. I haven't been actively involved here but have had some fab advice just by lurking over the last 3 years - so thankyou all smile

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