First time posting on mumsnet! Need advice!(2 Posts)
Hello from ireland! My partner is separated with 2 dd's both early teens. His ex wife moved to London with girls shortly after separation. Girls were born and raised in Ireland and were very upset about leaving their dad and friends etc. My partner refused to let them leave the country initially but due to ex wife causing trouble and after seeking legal advice he was advised not to stop ex wife but to be patient and hope that it may bring some calm to a very stressful and difficult situation.
2 years later and my partner and his ex wife constantly argue and the girls are allowed to abuse their father on the phone and they are allowed to make their own decisions regarding travelling to see him or not for the holidays. Their mother is often putting down their father and seems to stir anger in them towards their father. However, recently the girls have warmed to their dad and are starting to open up saying that they can't talk to their mother about how they feel without her being sarcastic and angry. They have feelings that they cant express and they want to return to Ireland as they miss their dad, their friends and the lifestyle.
As a very close on looker I feel the family really need mediation and the girls would probably benefit from some family counselling which they have never received since the family break up.
Would it be wise for my partner to initiate mediation/support via the girls school in the uk? Is support like this offered via schools or should he seek this kind of help through another source?
Your advice is much appreciated as I don't have children of my own and I haven't much experience with kind of thing.
I should mention that one of the girls has asked her dad if she can live with him in Ireland? Her mother is saying she will call social services on him if this happens.
Your help and advice is much appreciated!
Lawyer up and fast!! Family mediation is a fantastic idea!! That way the parents and kids can discuss their own wants and needs together. A solicitor can arrange this for your partner and it would be a step in the right direction with regards to building up the communication break down. It could be that their mother is suffering from golden uterus syndrome (google it it made me smile) .
Whilst their mother doesn't have to comply he is fortunate that they are of an age to have an opinion and if she is influencing them in any way then more fool her because life will open their eyes for them and as years progress they will see the bigger picture! Good luck let me know how it goes x
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