You are only allowed in if you are not an utter ARSE, by order of a poorly dragon.

[HoneyDragon]

I have a cold. A proper doozy of one. I am grumpy. I am staying here, in Euro 2012 till I feel better.

There appears to a lot of left over meat pies, Doritos and Lager. I may even dust off the bar.

But you can only come in if you promise not to be snippy or mean, or I will stamp on you till you are greasy.

[ChickensHaveNoEyebrows]

I am also lurgified. I am also covered in puppy fluids. Love me, HD

[FrebbieMisaGREATshag]

I too am lurgified.

And I have a kidney infection.

I claim the cup.

[HoneyDragon]

Can you not teach Jas to read then he can do Gwendy Baily with Shit Slidey Puppy?

[Hassled]

I won't be snippy - I have cystitis and am too pathetic to be snippy. I just want to curl into a little ball and sob a bit.

[FrebbieMisaGREATshag]

My poor deprived children are fighting the bit out cooking their own tea.

[HoneyDragon]

There's no cup Fredders soz. I do have a great big teak club in case SP tries to bring Cliff in here.

You can be in charge of that if you like?

[ChickensHaveNoEyebrows]

Jas and the puppy are joyfully rolling around the floor sounding like the hounds from hell. Every so often they let up on the blood curdling growling/snarling to lick each other and have a kip

[HoneyDragon]

On the bright side, MNHQ won't dare kick me out of a topic this time. They won't risk catching the LURGY OF EVIL?

[FrebbieMisaGREATshag]

Cliff once slept on my mother's camp bed

And that is an honest to God true fact.

[HoneyDragon]

Wow. That is quite an awesome fact. Although it couldn't be any other bed than a camp one really could it, if it had Cliff in it?

[HoneyDragon]

May I have details as to how this came about?

[BrianCoxandTheTempleofDOOM]

can I come in?

I have greasy hair and the baby just threw up on my face as I was kissing his chubby cheeks.

you want to be me don't you!

[FrebbieMisaGREATshag]

He was doing some sort of gospel tour in the 80's and ended up staying with a minister friend of my parents'

Really not that exciting. Sorry.

[AmazingBouncingFerret]

Oh I misread the thread title, I thought it said you are only allowed in here if you ARE an arse...



I'll just get me coat..

[AvrilPoisson]

Um... you do know that this appears in Active COnvos, right?

[HoneyDragon]

ABF

You can stay if your not snippy or mean. I'll not swish you.

Oh. So we can speculate that you are Cliffs love child then?

[HoneyDragon]

Can't ... Doh

[ClaraOswald]

[nenevomito]

Not snippy or mean. I've just spent the last 10 mins singing lullabies. I mean how un-snippy or mean can you get.

I'm just settling down to some Judge Judy. I'll let her get snippy on my behalf.

[AmazingBouncingFerret]

I'm on my best behaviour tonight.

[ClaraOswald]

Have you been on your worst behaviour then ABF?

[HoneyDragon]

Avril .... That's why I put a sign on the door and everythink,

Thank you Clara actually that's a good idea, I might make some hot berry squash if smallest dragon relents and sleeps.

[AmazingBouncingFerret]

Clara I have my moments.

[ClaraOswald]

I have to go back to work next monday and I am already dreading it.

[nenevomito]

Ferret is actually a little sweetie.

I'm on day 3 of a diet. I want chocolate chip and hazelnut boasters. I don't even want them when I'm not dieting, but now they seem the most amazing things in the world.