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I have a bollicle

(20 Posts)
stabbypokey Tue 05-Jul-16 20:53:07

I am a confirmed sporner, but this bastard has me stumped.

I'm three days in with a shocking marble sized growth on my fanjo.

It is so big and so hard that I just want to get a cigar cutter around the thing and cut off its blood supply, which surely must be placenta sized by now.

I've tried mag sulph but it won't stay on due to the constant movement; a hot bath and some thumb and forefinger rolling pilates only served to make the top flat, like table mountain.

It's life changing, but due to its position, no pictures unfortunately.

I need help and I need it bad.

Notthiswankagain Tue 05-Jul-16 22:45:03

Is it painful? (I'm slightly jealous...)

dancemom Tue 05-Jul-16 22:47:11

This is Sporner Corner - leave your shame at the door and get that photo uploaded .....

MadameCholetsDirtySecret Tue 05-Jul-16 22:47:17

Come on now stabby, you know the rules:

A photo or it doesn't exist.

cosmicglittergirl Tue 05-Jul-16 22:48:37

Pic plz.

Diamogs Tue 05-Jul-16 22:50:45

Ouch you poor thing. I think you really need to go to the docs with that one - I'm sure I recall someone ending up in hospital after a big spot that she had been poking got infected.

couldntlovethebearmore Tue 05-Jul-16 22:52:43

Could it be a bartholians cyst?

RoosterCogburn Tue 05-Jul-16 22:55:00

I had one of those - I've posted this before but its worth sharing again.

Due to its position I was having trouble seeing it, I tried a mirror but then hit on the brilliant idea of using my iPhone to take some snaps.
All well and good - I had a good look at the bugger and marvelled at its size

Next day I was watching TV, friends called round. Muted the TV and we sat chatting. After a while the AppleTV screen saver kicked in and images began to scroll across the TV screen. Cats, Dogs, Holiday snaps, Flowers, my banjo with boil and my blurry face peering down.

I really regretted getting the large screen TV.

The bolicle burst in the bath a few days later.

The shame and embarrassment never left me

RoosterCogburn Tue 05-Jul-16 22:55:38

My fanjo - I was not playing music deliverance style

Crumblevision Tue 05-Jul-16 22:58:07

Where's Kato? She had a normous bollicle. She'll see you right OP 😂

DonkeyOaty Tue 05-Jul-16 22:58:54

yes GP for you I'm afraid

You dont want an emergency op to take it out

Gooseysgirl Tue 05-Jul-16 23:02:28

Ah yes Kato's legendary bollicle follicle grin

QuimReaper Tue 05-Jul-16 23:04:07

Rooster I still remember your blurry frowning little face peering down at the lens in the background of your fanjo portrait and smile. Thank yahoo for bringing it into my life grin

UmbongoUnchained Tue 05-Jul-16 23:05:21

Ooooh I had one once! I rolled it for about a week between thumb and finger and eventually a head appeared and it burst by itself in my white short shorts 😬

Pinkerbeller Tue 05-Jul-16 23:10:52

You didn't have a sterilised needle to hand once you'd got a flat top?

cries at missed opportunity

peaceloveandtwirlywoos Tue 05-Jul-16 23:23:26

Just placemarking winebiscuit

pieceofpurplesky Tue 05-Jul-16 23:32:42

cakewine

stabbypokey Wed 06-Jul-16 08:44:35

There is no way I can take a photo! I know the rules and I'm genuinely sorry I can't. It doesn't hurt at the moment, I can't seem to find that sweet spot (so to speak)when you squeeze and it is really painful. It is kind of inert.

Further mithering last night only resulted in it sort of becoming corrugated as though it was a triple header. This morning it is a bigger marble, no head, no crunchiness.

I'm kind of delighted, I think this will keep on giving for days to come.

stabbypokey Wed 06-Jul-16 08:45:42

Ah, didn't realise a flat top was a needle opportunity. I'll see if I can coax some more shape shifting.

stabbypokey Wed 06-Jul-16 08:47:28

I too remember Kato's posts smile

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