Share your hilarious family holiday stories with Drac from Hotel Transylvania 3 - £300 voucher to be won

[DracLordOfDarkness]

Hello, it’s me, Drac, again! Thank you for all of your wonderful tips to help me survive my family vacation on the world’s first ever cruise for monsters. Yes, yes a cruise is just a hotel on water! I know we might as well have stayed at home at Hotel Transylvania, but my little ghoul Mavis insisted I need a vacation. I’ve heard that lots of people, especially humans, like to go on family holidays and I would love to hear about them and any funny stories you have.

My most hilarious moment on my monster cruise holiday was on the plane over. I know it’s ridiculous because vampires can fly but apparently I need to relax. We flew with the infamously dangerous Gremlin Air who have truly excellent customer service on board as you can see below . PM me if you’d like their details - they’re truly fangtastic.

So what hilarious family holiday stories do you have? Did someone get really bad moon-tan lines? Perhaps you tricked someone into eating a bucket of garlic? Did you go on a cruise and someone accidentally dropped their suitcase or phone overboard? Or the whole family take part in Karaoke? I love Karaoke and have some spooktacular moves to go with my singing!

Whatever your funny family holiday stories are, please share them with me and you will be entered into our Hotel Transylvania 3 prize draw to win a £300 voucher of your choice. Maybe you could use the vouchers for your own luxury monster cruise vacation?

Good luck!

Drac

Standard Insight T&Cs apply

[bikerclaire]

I watched a programme on natural anti-mossie defences and thought that one mentioned was raw onion, well I must've got it wrong as my boyfriend tried it out when camping by literally smearing raw onion juice all over his neck and cheeks - big mistake! He was surrounded with a cloud of nasty, bitey insects and had to go and have a shower to get rid of them!

[danigrace]

Less funny more fail but our babies first trip to the beach he kept trying to put pebbles in his mouth and obviously some sand must have gotten in because the day ended with us being confused as to what all the 'sandy grains' in his poo were...

[Ratbagcatbag]

I can laugh now, but my car breaking down in Scotland two mins from the a & e I was taking my then 18 month old too, car being towed away (Saturday evening) to a garage miles away. Rain continued torrentially all weekend and finally when I spoke to the garage on Monday, the alternator had gone on my car, but unfortunately the only refurbished replacement one was stuck the other side of a landslide that had cut the main road off.
Finally got my car back on the weds!! (DD was fine too, just a sprain!). We were in the middle of nowhere too!!
Like I say, I laugh so much now, it was like one of those comedy sketches. If it could go wrong it totally did go wrong. 🤦‍♀️

[bridgetosomewhere]

Years ago we fancied a beach holiday at short notice and booked the only thing in budget and leaving the next day. It was to Madeira.
At the airport I bought a guide book and discovered on the plane there were no beaches! It’s all rocks.
Turned out to be the coldest week they had that year and we sunbathed in our jeans!

Not the best beach holiday I’ve ever been on!

[jacqui5366]

When my DS1 was learning to talk, we loved take photos of his first year, especially our first family holiday, so everytime we stopped for a photo he would shout out FUC%OFFASES at the top of his voice when he meant PHOTOGRAPHS (got suck of explaining by day 4)

[asuwere]

When I was young, we stayed in a chalet with patio doors leading to a large deck. My sister was about 14 and far too cool to be with us. She ended up walking inside to avoid being seen with her younger siblings but of course walked straight into the closed patio door! Don't think I've ever asked if she hurt herself as we all laughed so much! Whenever we speak about that holiday or the area, we always mention the patio door incident!

[GazeboLantern]

My parents nearly did a Home Alone, more than once on the same holiday. I think we were about 3-9 yo. Certainly the older ones were old enough to know better! It was in the days before seatbelts, when nobody thought twice about wedging 4 children into the back seat. Parents didn't realise that the rental car had no childlocks, and when they fed us in on one side of the car, trying to juggle all the beach equipment and whatnot, one of us would get out on the other side of the car. I blame the novelty of not having childlocks. I think they drove off without one of us a couple of times before they realised what we were doing. Little horrors

[lovemyflipflops]

not funny at the time - but is now, when my bag was stolen from the beach with the car and holiday let keys in, we all had to go to the police station, and all I had to cover my mummy tummy was my pink inflatable swimming ring (which I wore in the police station) - until we found another keyholder for the holiday let.

[TheWizardofWas]

Rather minor but it was the horror on little Dad's face when she saw her tongue after eating a bright blue ice cream.

[noregretsanynore]

My mil falling over and cutting her head. We asked why didn't you put your hands down to save yourself, she replied I didn't want to drop my beach towel!!! Head injury far better than a dropping an already wet and dirty beach towel

[Sleepysausage]

We went on holiday and were going to be 1 hour ahead. Except we thought we would be 2 hours ahead. We both changed our watches and then forgot we'd done it and changed them again. So we were 3 hours ahead. We didn't realise untill the end of the week when we arrived early at the airport. We'd hired a car and not booked and tables so hadnt needed to actually use the the at all for the week. We thought everyone eat really late and got up really late all week!

[skinnyamericano]

At a child-friendly, but rather upmarket, hotel where there was a baby listening service you were ‘encouraged’ to use whilst you had dinner in the adult-only restaurant.

So we left our 6 and 3 year old watching a film and (rather anxiously) popped downstairs. Just after our starter when we were beginning to relax a bit, our 3 year old appeared at our table - COMPLETELY NAKED!

We were all ushered out fairly hastily and stuck to room service from then on!

[Montydoo]

When my 5 year old son was in a hotel lounge with us, and another guest was making small talk with us,.......guest ...... 'are you enjoying your holiday with your mummy and daddy ?' DS 'he's not my daddy - he's a transvestite !!!' ............. after picking my husband off the floor metaphorically, we laughed it off. Still to this day do not know where he got this word from, and where he thought it meant. (obvs my husband is not a cross-dresser)

[NeverTwerkNaked]

We took the children to the Isle of Wight and decided to go to Osborne House (queen Victoria’s holiday house) we got caught up in a coach trip of very well behaved pensioners as we walked round...not a problem till we reached a long corridor filled with naked statues and my daughter (4) just started yelling “willies!! Lots of willies everywhere!!”” And giggling hysterically!

[DracLordOfDarkness]

@bikerclaire That’s so hilarious it made my fangs hurt

[Allington]

On holiday to a Corfu as a child aged about ...

Ferries from the mainland went every hour, at half past. We got there at about 6.20pm.

"Shall we rush for this one, or wait for the next?" asked my parents.

Of course, I was the sucker who said "Let's get this one"...

Coming into Corfu harbour the ramp mechanism fails, the ramp drops completely into the water and goes underneath the ferry.

Ferry chugs round in circles, then backwards in circles. Ramp is firmly underneath the boat and refuses to come out.

The 7.30pm ferry comes past and docks and unloads with no problems. The 8.30pm ferry comes past and docks and unloads with no problems.

Food and drink on the ferry run out (it's only a half hour crossing usually, so supplies were low to start with). We have food in the car, but the cars get parked so tightly you can't get in once you've left them.

The crew finally manage to coax the ramp from underneath and it hovers too low for the side of the dock. Luckily the old harbour has a sloping dock, so they land there and run the ramp up the slope by about 10.30pm.

We arrived at midnight, just as the taverna were packing up. Luckily it was somewhere we went every year, so we got a big welcome, they opened up again to cook us something, and we crashed out in the olive grove without even bothering to put up the tent.

Needless to say, for years acording to family lore it was the time 'Allington' was impatient and 'everyone else' suffered!

[sharond101]

We got off the transfer bus at the wrong hotel!

[Sugarhouse]

We went on a camping holiday and the campsite flooded the pool was full of muddy flood water and people’s tents were floating We had good fun though

[poopoopoo]

When we went on holiday the main road was being worked on that led to the hotel. There was a coned of area of the road and at night it was very dark, a lorry drove into the road works area and it went down into a large hole! This caused the whole road to be blocked off so we could not get round by car we had to get locals on motorbikes to take us across fields to get to the nearest town!

[poopoopoo]

coned off area of road

[poopoopoo]

Another difficult situation was on a fishing trip we were out on a bamboo platform in the middle of the sea, when a storm came and we were stuck there, it got dark and the sea came right up to the platform base. It was terrifying. Finally the storm passed and the guy with the boat came back from the shore to get us! Never again!!!

[nocutsnobuttsnococonuts]

We went on a haven holiday and got lost coming back from the clubhouse so we had to use our phone lights to try and work out where we were. Took us 45 mins to find our chalet. In that time dd1 tripped over and rolled down a hill. Dd2 dropped a toy we had to search for with torch lights and we walked in several circles.

Then we didn't learn and got lost again the next night 😂

[Theimpossiblegirl]

My girls seem to have many hilarious holiday memories of me being a nervous passenger while DH drove us around the Greek islands in an old jeep. Apparently it's very funny watching me sweat.
:)

[MissCalamity]

We stayed in a friends apartment in Tenerife, arrived at midnight with knackered 2 1/2 year old DS to an 8ft gate with no key code. After numerous attempts to contact friend & neighbour in the apartment block with no response, we decided to climb over the gate, I went first, then collected both suitcases, pushchair & DS. DP then climbs over & as we are straightening ourselves up, points to the gate open button on the wall which I could have pressed when I got over

The next morning once we laughed about it, we went to go out of the complex, DS running in front of us makes an attempt to start climbing over the gate again...

[GetKnitted]

A family holiday when I was 17, our car was stuck in the mud, and me and my cousin were pushing from the back while the driver tried to very slowly pull forward.. you can see where this is going.... we both ended up flat in the mud and we couldn't even get up for laughing!