Tell Count Olaf the chores you wish you could ask your DCs to do this half term - chance to win £300 voucher NOW CLOSED

[CountOlaf]

Hello, hello, hello… It is I, Count Olaf – guardian of the Baudelaire orphans Violet, Klaus and Sunny, and magnificent and respected theatre performer.

Violet is the eldest; she is followed by Klaus, and then Sunny, who is an infant. I have provided these lucky orphans with a rat-infested room - including a complementary pile of rocks at no cost to them, and shampoo that encourages tears - and I believe, therefore, that I am quite justified in asking them to do a range of minor chores for me in return.









My list includes:

• Keep the kitchen gleamingly clean
  
• Keep the library well dusted
  
• Polish the floors in the ballroom
  
• Hang my undergarments in the laundry room after they've washed them
  
• Weed, mow, and preen the gardens
  
• Chop wood in the back yard
  

Alas, these wealthy brats have been utterly spoilt! They've never done a chore in their lives, and therefore believe that I am BU to ask them to carry out such tasks - which is why, my adoring MNer fans, I wish to ask you: which chores you wish you could ask your DCs to do?

I feel your anguish having to spend more time with your DCs since it’s half term, so what chores do you wish you could ask your DCs to do during half term? Would you like your moody teenager to be able to whip up a Michelin star meal? Or your toddler to not only put away their toys, but also hoover the lounge? Whether it’s something small like wanting your DCs to do the washing up or make their own beds, or something more elaborate like wishing they would Marie Kondo your wardrobe or build you a garden retreat, tell me, Count Olaf - and I will reward one of you with a £300 voucher.

Yours most handsomely,

Count Olaf



Standard Insight T&Cs Apply

[CMOTDibbler]

TBF, mine is pretty good on the jobs front - he likes cooking, has his own pair of marigolds for washing up, and did clean under his bed last week.

But I'd really really like for him to go and jet wash the deck, scrub it, and apply deck oil. We have a huge deck, and its a manky job.

[SasBel]

Actually I would like them to be able to make me cups of tea. None of them are tall enough to reach the tea, mugs etc so might have to wait for a bit.
They already tidy up and unlike DH understand how to operate the washing machine.

[missedtherainbow]

I would like one of my four to follow the dog round with a mop and hand held vacuum, to wipe clean his trail of paw prints and the cloud of dog hair he leaves in his wake.
Another I would put in charge of cooking dinners because of course it's only natural that one child will only eat food that is beige, another loves eggs, another hates eggs, two like rice two won't touch it, two love pasta and yes you guessed it two hate pasta, so that child must provide a variety of meals each day.
The third child would be made responsible for the ironing of which there is an outstanding mountain of each and every morning because it is easier for them to put clean ironed washing back in the laundry basket instead of in their draws, apparently clothes can get dirty by you just looking at them.
The fourth and final child would be in charge of household maintenance, painting over the occasional graffiti that appears in coloured pencil on the walls (you would hope they would at least have the sense not to write their names🙄) to constantly readjust the window blinds that I am sure they must swing from, oh and They must also clean the windows because it's only natural that they like to lick them and draw pictures with their lovely dribble.
Please make my wishes come true! If not a £300 would be greatly appreciated Mr Count Olaf, sorry Count Olaf!

[NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom]

Cleaning the oven, I absolutely hate, hate, hate, hate, HATE cleaning the oven-would be nice if they could do it..
What they actually do is dust the skirting boards, for some bizarre reason they love that chore-pair of little weirdos

[InvisibleKittenAttack]

Make me coffee.

Hoover the stairs.

[GoodyGoodyGumdrops]

My dc are, unlike your Baudelaires, mostly accommodating when asked to do a chore.

What I would like to see, however, is them doing things without being asked.

Yes, I know you didn't drop that, but it's on the floor so pick it up.

Yes, I know it's not all your laundry, but the basket's full and you want a fresh shirt, so put a whole load on.
^^
Yes, I know I haven't asked you to do it, but the washing machine has finished, so unload and hang.

[MetalMidget]

My son is rubbish at chores. He doesn't clean or tidy, load the dishwasher or washing machine, or mow the lawn.

In his defence, he is only six months old, but still...

[UpOnDown]

Definitely to keep track of all the commitments in the family.

[Surreyblah]

Cook my tea, so I can complain about it, sit there for an hour while it gets cold, leave most of it, then ask for sweets, crisps, chocolate or whatever I fancy 10 mins later.

[HerRoyalFattyness]

I wish my 3 year old would clean the bathrooms. She.makes most of the mess so it's only fair she cleans it.
I wish my 8 year old would do the chores he's supposed to do without me having to hover over him to make sure he's doing it properly. If I leave him to get in woth it he pretends to do stuff lazy bugger takes after his dad.
And finally I wish the 18 month would pick up the.toys he's thrown all over the living room.

[Beeziekn33ze]

Wish 2 year old would tidy toys away and 6 year old not leave the floor carpeted with books! And that both would forage at breakfast for all those Cheerios that end up lurking in crevices in chairs and disguised on the matching carpet!!

[BreconBeBuggered]

Anything at all without humphing about being a slave would be nice. Changing the beds would be excellent.

[luckylucky24]

I think mine are too young for chores but I think if I could I would get them to clean the kitchen after every meal and sweep the floor- also after every meal because the pair of them make so much mess!

[Jenniferb21]

I would love it if my DS could clear his own toys away. He's only 10 months old in his defence. But every day I get his toys out and set them up beautiful (bit OCD maybe?) by the end of the day my living room looks like a ransacked toy shop!

It's pretty time consuming putting them all back. Luckily he's cute so I can get thtrough it

[IonaAilidh11]

do the ironing, and empty the hoover

[WowOoo]

I wish the kids could remove all of the wallpaper from the sitting room. I started a small area and gave up. Have less time off in half term than I thought, so I'd love them to do it. Surely being up a ladder and scraping stuff off a wall would be fine?

[ButterflyOfFreedom]

Definitely tidy the house, the whole house! After all it's mostly their toys / clothes / equipment that take up the space and make the place look messy!!

I'd love them to make me a nice cup of tea too!

[prettybird]

I'd just like ds to understand that the dishwasher doesn't magically empty itself and that dirty plates don't jump into the dishwasher of its own accord

He has got better at bringing his dirty plates down from his room/taking the dirty plates through after a family meal, but he thinks his job is done if he just leaves them on the counter.

[doctorboo]

Cook the family meals...that often feels a wee bit like a chore to me (they're only 5, 3 and 1.5 years old)

Oh and put out the bins! Only a few more years to go!

[SerialReJoiner]

Clean the basement. It is full of junk that needs Kondo-ing, camping gear that needs organising, shelves need putting up, and I'd also appreciate the window being replaced and concrete floor painted. I really don't think it's a lot to expect but you'd think I was an evil task masker Olaf impersonator....

[Warmworm]

Change the loo roll when the old one runs out. I've been asking now for about 6 years....

[GiraffesAndButterflies]

If the 3 year old could look after her 1 yr old brother that would be VERY helpful. That's not too much to ask, right?

She does it voluntarily on occasion, and will bring him a toy / tell him off for something. It's just the attention span that needs work. And her tendency to get enraged at him for looking at any of her toys.

I could have quite a nice peaceful day with the childcare taken care of for me

[CigarsofthePharoahs]

I would like mine to cook their own sodding food. Maybe they'd appreciate it more if they'd put the effort in. I think I'd like to get my eldest to redecorate our living room, following my strict instructions of course. That's a good half term project for a 6 year old, isn't it? I'll get the two year old on more basic things like scrubbing the toilet and mopping the floors. Perhaps in time I can train him to bring me a plate of hors d'overs and a glass of wine when I snap my fingers.

[happybeeisgoingcrazy]

I wish my 6 month old could make me a cup of coffee. Mmmmm hot coffee. It's been so long since I've had coffee that was actually hot.

[asuwere]

I would like it if my DC did things without being asked - they would rather climb over a box on the stairs than just carry it up with them. Or, when asked to do a job, it would be nice if they didn't take it quite so literally; eg. when asked to do their dishes, it doesn't mean ignore any other dishes waiting to be washed next to the sink!