NOW CLOSED: Share with BT how you would help (or have helped) your mum, MIL or gran get online this Mother’s Day. You could win an iPad, worth £329!

[AnnMumsnet]

We've been asked by BT as part of their Get IT Together campaign to ask you for your top tips for getting the older generation online.

And BT would love you to help spread the word about their campaign, too. They're aiming to help 100,000 people get online by the end of this year.

If your mum, or somebody else you know, isn't online, why not help them get there this Mother's Day? As the internet is such a brilliant way to keep in touch with family, share photos and shop online for gifts for the grandchildren what better Mother's Day gift could there be?

According to BT, about 8 million people have never used the internet, and, as Gabby Logan, spokesperson for BT's Get IT Together campaign, says it's often just lack of confidence that stops them getting started. "Maybe they feel daunted or worry they are going to do something wrong," says Gabby. "If your mum isn't online, like my mum wasn't, why not spend some time with her and help her take those first steps? Get IT Together BT's Get IT Together website has step by step advice and videos to help you both. I'm sure she won't look back - my mum certainly didn't!?

Please do use this thread to share your tips with other MNers, and with BT, about getting your mum, MIL, grandmother or anyone older get online - whether you've done it already or are just gearing up for it.

Tell us your stories, too! How did you/will you approach it? Will/did you get your children involved? What does/will your mum or MIL most like to do on the net? Will she be/is she already a Gransnetter?

Everyone who adds a tip or story to this thread will be entered into a prize draw, from which one lucky person will win a 16GB iPad 2 worth £329. Please note your comments may be used on the BT pages on Mumsnet. Your MN nickname may be used along with your quote.

Thanks and good luck
MNHQ

[MyHeadMightExplode]

My mum was a complete technophobe but wanted to be able to start using emails. I set her up on the same mail programme that I have - so that I could be 'technical support' for her if there were any problems. I also set up a Skype account for her so she can now talk to my children over the webcam which they all love - not sure any of our cats do as they are held up to the camera to say hello to Grandma!
I also sat with mum and went through the sending of emails, using attachments etc step by step , she wrote down each step in a notebook to refer back to later.

All pretty straightforward stuff. Mum is a whizz now and can't believe she was intimidated before!

[Firawla]

My mum is online loads these days, i think once we moved out she got more chance at it really because me and my other siblings used to be always hogging the pc.. she started off with email but now she is on facebook and does everything.
My mil did not really know about using the pc so we got her an ipad as its easier to use, so she can do emails and skype, and got the same for some other relatives for the same reason.
Even my granny is online these days, although does not use it as much as mine or mum's generation but she goes on email and has facebook. Don't think she would have time to be on gransnet though as she is quite busy!

[FruitShootsAndHeaves]

I'm sure my mum would have loved the internet. She loved learning things and reading and was doing an OU degree course in Maths when she became ill. Sadly she never finished it
However my parents were both a bit technophobic (they used to get me to program to VCR for them!) so someone would have had to show them how to set it all up and install wireless etc. Which would have been fine as DH is a bit obsessive very interested in computers. I don't think my dad would have been at all interested.

MIL and FIL are online and really love the DC's sending them emails. (they live 4 hours away) They don't use it for much else. Luckily we have some fairly computer savvy people in our family to help them with choosing and installing new equipment, any problems, updates etc
Although they held out for a while eventually it helped that their children and grandchildren were all keen for them to get online and now they can communicate via email whenever they like and send photo's etc.

[Indith]

We first git internet when I was a teenager so I was always around to help. The computer monitor used to have post-it notes stuck all round the edge with step by step guides . She and dad still struggle sometimes and type the e-mail addresses they want to send to in the bar and then look all confused when it doesn't magically open their e-mail account. Web based stuff is confusing too, the concept of being able to log onto her skype account from my laptop os mind boggling. In fact mum now has 2 skype accounts because she couldn;t work out how to use her old one on her new computer! The manage eventually but somtimes I just give up after conversations like:

"just log in using your details"
"but what are my details?"
"what do you normally use?"
"I don't know the compter normally does it automatically"
"ah"

In fact I think half the problem with them is the automatic start up of things like skype. I'd say that you have to make sure they know their log in details and write them down somewhere otherwise if they ever have to clear their cookies, reformat or buy a new computer they just wob't be able to get back to their usual accounts!

My mum has an ipod touch, she doesn't have a clue how to connect it to wifi. My sister set ut up for her and has a habit if doing things for her instead of letting her do it herself and talking her through. I have shown her since but she still can't do it. They don't have wifi at home, it was supposed to be so she could keep up with her business e-mails when she went on holiday!

[Moodykat]

My grandma had a computer and could use it to do emails but she never used it much. On our advice she bought herself an iPad and we can't get her off it now! A brilliant invention as it's easy to use and she can rest it on her lap without it being too heavy. Can guarantee that if my mum was still alive she'd have one too!

[Blatherskite]

My Mum lives a 2 hour drive away from us so it's not easy to pop over if she has problems. While we were visiting once, DH set up a file on her desktop with instructions and links to all the things she needs to do to get him the information he needs to access her PC remotely.

Now, if she has a problem that either of us can't talk her through, he remotes on and fixes it. She thinks it's amazing the way the mouse cursor moves without her touching it.

He also did the same for his Mum. She only lives down the road but it's handy for when he doesn't fancy going out to her :)

I think it makes them feel more secure that if ever they need help, we can be there even if we're not nearby.

[NormaStanleyFletcher]

Skype! Being able to see the grandchildren is a great incentive.

We set stuff up for both of our sets of parents, and give phone support.

[GwendolineMaryLacey]

I bought my mum an iPad. It's not a computer, she can't delete anything or make anything go wrong, which was her greatest fear. She doesn't have to know which software does what. She just touches what she wants. It couldn't get any simpler. And she loves FaceTime and spying on my Facebook page

[inmysparetime]

My MIL is a technophobe (she phones every few weeks to ask which number it is on the remote for BBC Three)
DH helps by patiently talking her through her IT problems despite being 200 miles away. She panics when she gets e.g. an unfamiliar file type attached to an email, and DH has taught her how to forward it to him so he can change the file type to one she knows.
My Mum is the other end of the spectrum, she had an iPhone when they first came out, and was using the Internet in the 1990s! She tells me about new features I can use on my iPod, and got me using FaceTime .

[Teladi]

Installing something like TeamViewer is a must if you can't easily get over to your relative's house! It makes it much more easy than trying to describe what the Internet Explorer icon looks like over the phone....

[MooseyMoo]

My dad didn't use a computer until I moved to NZ for a couple of years. I gave him a few lessons before leaving. His main issue was double clicking. At first most of his emails were a couple of sentences, then he discovered smiley faces and could make incredibly funny emails with them scattered throughout. Then he found animated smileys...

He loves my iPad especially angry birds and is currently trying to persuade my mum to buy one. Not sure how useful it will be in a couple of years as he has arthritis in his hands.

[bagelmonkey]

The thing that really got my parents online was when I went away. They were completely disinterested in computers until I set them up with an email address before I went traveling.
When I moved abroad they started using Skype. They're really into it now that they have a grandchild.
My Dad now uses online banking and pays bills online, but he has to get my mum to use sky tv!

[bagelmonkey]

A lot of libraries run computer classes too.

[LovesBeingWearingSkinnyJeans]

I started mum off easy with eBay and she loves getting things for grandchildren. She's just got an iPhone and she's really got the hang of photos and what's app has been a great way to practise without wasting money cause tge messages, photos and videos are free too send.

[ohmeohmy]

If they had to technology already I would definitely go the iPad route. For catch up Tv, emails, general surfing it is by far the easiest. Would then set up the basics for them, teach them how to send emails, Skype, shop online safely and browse places like amazon ebooks, iTunes and newspapers, and the app store. Whilst I would give them various step by step guides and get them to write things down I would make sure they knew how to google for help topics.

Would be imperative to educate them about common scams, email to avoid opening, offers of love from Nigeria etc and to protect their passwords for things like online banking.

[CMOTDibbler]

Unfortunatly, my mum is no longer able to go online as dementia means shes lost the ability to use the PC.
My dad is a great fan of ebay and Amazon, but bypasses the gui by phoning me and getting me to do it for him

MIL and FIL are online, but fil is a right fiddle fingers and I have to fix his pc/router on a regular basis after he breaks stuff

[MakeTeaNotWar]

I set my Mum up with a Facebook account, contacted friends for her and sorted out her privacy settings.

She still can't really tell the difference between writing public messages on people's walls and messaging them privately but otherwise it's an amazing way for her to see family albums from relatives all over the world and keep in touch with them daily.

[Shakey1500]

I have given up trying to get my mum online! I went through the basics on my laptop, left it with her while I went out and come back to discover all and sundry downloaded on it. Took me ages to sort it out!

Not a tip obviously (will read them all) I still want to win the prize though

[BenderBendingRodriguez]

If your olds are anything like mine, my top tip is to take a valium first

[ChunkyMonkeyMother]

I found that my Nan just loved looking through the photos various family members had posted onto Facebook so I would take my laptop and dongle round and she would go through them for hours - some of the pictures were of her great-great nieces children from Scotland whom she hadn't seen for over 10 years - she loved it so much, she felt very involved and even managed to webcam with one of her nieces who lives in Abu Dhabi, she always used to say she felt closer than ever to them. It was a brilliant way of keeping her involved even if she did call it "that Facebook thing" every time!

[swallowedAfly]

bit of a sore subject. training my parents in computer use was unbelievably hard work. it's amazing the utter basics we take for granted - i remember even having to explain look it's like a page you can go up and down the page like this and you look for headings in bold or .... etc etc. they couldn't even unscramble what was visually before them you know? it was painstaking slow progress.

i dread to think how many hours have been spent helping them to get connected, set up email accounts and work out how to read/send/delete etc not to mention having to persuade my mother that no she did not want to give her details to every bit of spam in her inbox or every thing that said she could win a prize if she did.

they have a crappy laptop that is not turned on often enough and is really slow so every time you turn it on it is overwhelmed with updates and security checks etc - truly painful and swear worthy.

next stop will be to convince her that no a cheap nasty laptop does not last a lifetime and she needs to move on to something newer and more effective.

i feel i deserve an ipad for the nightmares i've been through with making them computer literate-ish - teaching her to text was hard enough.

[BenderBendingRodriguez]

sAf, i had to leave the room when my brother tried to teach my nan to text. thank god i wasn't there when he tried explaining the internet. he said the same thing as you, that he had to re-evaluate things when he realised that even the most basic level of assumed comprehension wasn't there.

[ChutesTooNarrow]

Currently helping my grandparents get to grips with a laptop and the internet. Thankfully I have a lot of patience from years working on an IT hell helpdesk.

Keep things simple, really simple. There are often a plethora of ways to achieve one action but pick one method and stick with it. For example my grandfather had just got the hang of copy and paste by right clicking but my sister butted in to demonstrate ctrl-c and ctrl-v and it just overcomplicated and confused things.

Setting igoogle as the browser home page, or using something like Opera speed dial, is a good idea as you can simply group together sites needed and browse from there. Obviously a bit of work is needed to set these pages up first but it is worth it for the ease of surfing afterwards.

If supporting over the phone the best way is to open your laptop and also do what you are trying to explain so you can give a better visual description.

The most common solution to 'my password doesn't work' is caps lock/number lock on/not on. Make sure you demonstrate both of those. Save a link to notepad on the desktop and ask to open that and type out the password so they can visually see if caps lock/number lock need adjusting.

[craftynclothy]

My mum refuses to go online. She has broadband free with whatever phone package thing she's on and we set everything up so that we can use it when we're there. I think the only way we'd convince her is if we bought her a computer, set it up and convinced her to go on to look at pictures of the kids.