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Helping BIL(21) with Autism to start dating... advice?!

(4 Posts)
GlorifiedDatingAssistant Sun 10-Apr-16 21:35:41

Hi everyone smile

I'm looking for some advice! My BIL (technically not my BIL but you get my drift!) has autism and has recently asked myself and my partner (his brother) to help him start dating. He is quite independent and is an attractive young man with plenty to offer, but has never had a girlfriend or been on a date before. We want to help him as best we can, but really have no idea of the best way to help him get started!

Are there any autism dating sites in the UK that he should open an account with or should we just start him on OkCupid/POF and mention in his profile that he has autism/look for other users with autism? Is he better off using a dating agency rather than a website? He has mentioned before that it is crucial for him that the person he dates either has autism or is understanding of autism.

I want this to be a really positive experience for him, and for him to find someone that he can love and have a life with. Any advice?

anonnymummy Tue 12-Apr-16 00:00:27

Hello Glorified! It's lovely that your BIL feels he is able to reach out to you to help with this issue, and I do hope you can help him out in this respect.

I'm not sure if you've seen the TV show 'The Undatables' - it features a number of young (and not so young) people with various issues, including autism, who are looking for dates. They do feature a number of dating agencies - here is a list!

www.able2uk.com/news/film/dating-sites-covered-in-the-undateables

Hope that is helpful for you.

BTW I have an adult brother who is (undiagnosed) ASD and has never been on a date, but I think that ship maybe has sailed unfortunately, as he is now in his fifties. But you never know...

Wishing you all the best with your dating assistance!

anonnymummy Tue 12-Apr-16 00:06:40

Hmm. One of those links is not correct. I believe this is the right one:

www.outsiders.org.uk/outsidersclub/

Bethany22 Tue 19-Apr-16 01:26:35

I am 21 and have Aspergers Syndrome and I have never dated (much to my older sisters' exasperation, there hoping I'll start at uni but don't think so lol) but I don't think that a dating website is a good idea it leaves him vulnerable to manipulation and "mate-crime" if you can find a safe way for him to start dating let me know please, we aspies struggle socially but we do want the same as everyone else, it gets lonely, we know what we want but struggle to find someone who can understand who we are and how ASD affects us.

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