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Is this about right or should I be asking for more?

(6 Posts)
wanttohideunderthestairs Mon 29-Apr-19 19:52:34

My dd is 10 years old and was diagnosed with sensory processing difficulties when she was 4 years, she has anxiety and social communication difficulties also and we are waiting for an autism assessment. She has has an iep since starting school and has always been working a year behind, depending on who you ask she’s either making progress but the gap is moving with her or she’s beginning to narrow the gap but is still a year behind every year iyswim. She has always had every intervention available and is currently in a specialist English nurture class. All professionals working with her have told school/previous school that her needs will impact her learning and social communication. They have all advised an ed psych assessment and two have said ehcp is needed due to the level of her sensory difficulties. School/previous school say no to ed psych and ehcp as she’s ‘fine’. There is no current support for her sensory needs at all and hasn’t ever been. Dd has always struggled with coping with school and has meltdowns daily from masking in school and trying to cope. She’s been so unhappy and stressed for years about school and self harms from the stress. My question is, is this level of support enough or would she qualify for further help or assessments?

Ellie56 Wed 01-May-19 22:02:37


Your poor DD has meltdowns daily, self harms and has been unhappy and stressed for years ? No this absolutely is NOT fine and you most certainly should be insisting, not asking, for more. She is like this because she is not getting the right level of support and the school quite frankly, are not meeting her needs.

The school is well out of order. It is not for them to say whether or not she can have an EHCP. It is the decision of the LA, not the school. The fact that at least two professionals have advised that she needs an EHCP should have been good enough reason for them to start the ball rolling and get the EP in to assess her. How dare they treat your DD so appallingly? angry

It is quite clear that your DD needs far more support than she is getting at the moment, otherwise she wouldn't be having so many issues or be so stressed.

I would apply for an EHC Needs assessment yourself. Information here:

And I would also go and see the GP and get her signed off school for a bit. If she is stressed to the point of daily meltdowns and self harming, this can't be good for her mental health.

So sorry she and you are going through this. Your poor poor little girl. flowers

If you need further advice contact the IPSEA helpline.

wanttohideunderthestairs Wed 01-May-19 22:34:19

Thank you Ellie.

I will look into a EHCP, I wasn't sure she would meet the criteria as she's only a year behind and does make sort of progress. I'm at such a loss with it all. Over the years she has learnt to mask and to fit in so she's not enough of a problem at school even though she also relies on the routine of school. She's paranoid of others looking at her so likes to blend in. So I just get the 'well we don't see a problem' answer. Although professionals have viewed her in school and pointed out things they have missed. But funnily enough although they say that I also get told that she fidgets, is easily distracted, learning is behind and has social difficulties so obviously not as fine as they make out. I feel for her as it must be horrible, most lunchtimes she takes herself to the library to 'get away' or she will wander the playground alone.

Ellie56 Wed 01-May-19 23:22:41

While LAs may make their own unlawful criteria (and pass these on to schools) the legal criteria that LAs must consider is:

whether the child or young person has or may have special educational needs (“SEN”); and
whether they may need special educational provision to be made through an EHC plan.

If the answer to both of these questions is yes, they must carry out an EHC needs assessment.

Two professionals have already indicated that your daughter would qualify, so I'd go ahead with the application. You already have lots of evidence. Everything you have written in these two posts plus any reports you have from the professionals that have already seen her.

She is "only a year behind". This isn't good enough.Every child is entitled to an education that allows them to reach their potential. If her needs were being met properly who knows what she is capable of?

All the things you mention are needs that are not being met and barriers to learning.

Being unable to focus could be down to sensory issues. If she is unable to focus she is not going to learn effectively. She may need to be in a calmer, quieter environment.

The fidgeting may also be down to sensory needs not being met.

She is behind with her learning. She may need a different teaching style/ provision put in place to help her learn more effectively.

She obviously needs a social skills programme to help her learn how to socialise, which would need intervention from a specialist.

Masking is very common among girls diagnosed with autism. But this leads to huge stress build up which results in the meltdowns and self harming. Support needs putting in place to reduce the anxieties.

Your DD needs to be fully assessed by all the professionals so all her needs and the provision to meet these needs are all clearly identified and documented in the EHCP.

Good luck. It will be a long process and you'll probably have a few battles along the way, but hopefully things will improve once the proper level of support is put in place.

wanttohideunderthestairs Tue 07-May-19 14:12:30

Just wanted to update and say thanks again.

School have now got a better support plan In place and although they don't agree with an ehcp they have agreed to be supportive with anything I need to help me.

Sunnyd1234 Fri 17-May-19 07:57:53

Hi just to say go for an EHCP yourself. Our school put off for years as apparently the paper work was very long.
It turned out it wasn't - when I saw it I was amazed. The form you fill out is easy which no-one told me. Everyone said it was hard but they were wrong and the local SEN parent partnership will help you. If you apply you can get support to fill the main form.
On the school side as long as they have down a years IEP which shows insufficient progress she should qualify.
Also there a legal firms which will help you if rejected.

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