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Should we be forcing our daughter into school?

(2 Posts)
whatatod0 Wed 01-Nov-17 16:45:38

DD (year 8) has ASD dx, but she presents 'normally' at school - ie, doesn't cause any problems.
She has never liked school, and is refusing to go more and more often now. Her attendance is currently 59% I think.
Her reasons are just that she doesn't like it, it's boring, she has no friends, she's too tired, too hot, too cold, anything really.
Sometimes we pull her out of bed, put her in the car and drive her to school in a state. In doing this, she will reluctantly agree to get dressed by the front door before we leave the house so she doesn't arrive at school in her PJ's. This way, at least she gets into school and learns. Other days I can't face the trauma and she stays at home whilst I call off work to stay with her.
Can anyone help me? She doesn't have an ECHP (?) as once she is at school, she is declared as being "fine and happy". It is all very draining.
How can school become a better place for her?

unknownuser22 Mon 06-Nov-17 14:42:43

My sons like this. About 5 mins before he’s due to leave he gives up and goes in. He’s dyslexic ( under assessment ) I think dyspraxia too ? He’s got social anxiety, he’s been bullied, he’s obviously finds the work hard. I email his Sen leader she often meets him and takes him to Sen department and he works there.
He was ok until his friends turned on him as he can’t read social situations and being in a bigger setting he was overwhelmed, takes everything to heart, so they isolated him away from the group rather than saying they were only messing...They just ignore him!

I do force him some days but when he’s bad I take him in only if Sen leader meets him. It’s new to me all this. But he needs to know it’s hard but supports in place to help him.
He has other friends. He just says he doesn’t know why he doesn’t like it and he’s scared. But doesn’t know what off? I can wait for him to be assessed !

Every child’s different, can’t she be put on a shorter timetable so just half days ? Build it back up.
Sen made a huge difference to my dc, using the department instead of the normal lessons. Do they offer any way she can work in a smaller setting so she can build up some relationship with staff for them to try pin point any problems? Establish new friendships with other Sen kids? My dc enjoys helping the younger ones on Sen. Gives him confidence and makes him feel useful rather than useless . Just ideas my school done to make it more pleasant , rather than work work work as it blows his head and then he is off.

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