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Exclusions from school

(11 Posts)
TrafficJunkie Wed 10-May-17 22:33:40

Today, my son got excluded for implied swearing at a teacher. He said something that was meant to sound as close to f**k as possible. But he didn't swear. They have problems with him swearing from time to time at school. It appears to be an ongoing issue for a number of kids there.

It's a bit long winded to be honest the whole story but I'll do my best to explain it.

He has a lot of social troubles. He has Aspergers. He often misreads other children. He's always clashed with particular children at school, mostly other Aspie kids.
Today what had happened is a boy who I will name B was continually flicking paint at my son and various other children. According to my son the teacher ignored it save telling B to stop. B did, then when the teachers went inside for some reason, B started doing it again. Eventually my son retaliated by flicking paint back, and got caught. He was told to go indoors, and because of his sense of injustice (at having kept his cool for what felt like an age) he stormed off across the field. The 1-1 went after him and asked him to come out of the hedge where children aren't allowed to go and he refused and then did the fake swear. Eventually he went inside as asked and then calmed down.

My son flits between being settled at school and unsettled. Usually he's unsettled if he's had a social problem.

Yesterday, he got kicked in the chest and throat by a different boy. I'll name him X. The whole thing is a bit blurry because quite honestly I don't think any adult witnessed it, I think the adult account was pieced together from child witnesses..... my son has been relentlessly pursued by this X for a little while lately, and they've always had a rocky relationship.
X sort of goods my son and my son doesn't know ow how to respond so he usual just does his utmost to ignore him and usually succeeds even though this is massively difficult. According to my son, he was searching the classroom for his water bottle and saw it was behind X who was sat in a corner chatting to his friends. My son asked X to move so he could get it, X refused so my son asked another 2 times. On the third time, my son tried to move X unsuccessfully and then X yelled at him and kicked him to the floor. X was not excluded for this.

Now, is it unfair that my son was excluded for today's behaviour yet X wasn't excluded for yesterday's physical attack on my son?

I accept completely that my son should not swear or fake swear at people, nor should he be any other kind of rude.
They struggle with my autistic children massively....and are always trying to seek reasons for their school behaviour as stemming from home.
They are almost entirely different kids at home.

I feel like both situations were mishandled by the school.

Tainbri Thu 11-May-17 07:53:44

Is this a mainstream school? You mention a 1:1? Does he have an EHCP? If it's a specialist setting I would expect a far greater level of support, social intervention etc.

TrafficJunkie Thu 11-May-17 08:02:03

It is. And yes he has a full time 1:1 and an EHCP.

Tainbri Thu 11-May-17 08:09:03

Don't tell me it's a boys school in West Sussex?! I could have written this myself. When's your annual review? Does the 1:1 have sufficient training? It's their job to support your son. I've got my review coming up and I'm having the same issues. I've got the LA attending and have been copying them into my emails and concerns about social support for months. (In my case the pastoral care head is off on sick leave and the senco has just resigned!) if they're excluding your son, you need it in writing or they're breaking the law anyway. Speak to the SENDIS team in your area if you feel the EHCP is t being met and they can help you.

Meeep Thu 11-May-17 08:12:38

If he has a full time one to one, how was the situation allowed to develop to the stage where he was kicked to the floor?! I'd ask for a meeting. Grrrrrr on your behalf.

Meeep Thu 11-May-17 08:13:30

And all the other goading and teasing that led to the swearing incident. Where on earth is his support??

TrafficJunkie Thu 11-May-17 08:16:18

Well this is what I'm wondering. No its a primary school in Dorset. My son is 10.

Tainbri Thu 11-May-17 08:16:41

I agree Meep and that's why I asked if it's the same specialist school my son goes to! It's all too familiar angry

TrafficJunkie Thu 11-May-17 08:18:04

They always put it in writing the day after or if they have time, just before pick up. He's been excluded lots of times. The head always talks about how his staff have a right not to be sworn at. I'm sorry, but if you teach special needs kids, any kids, it comes out. My son told me a girl called another boy a c**the yesterday. It sounds like there is a massive lack of supervision.

Tainbri Thu 11-May-17 08:22:46

he's obviously not getting the right support. Are they external exclusions? They could be breaking the law. Have a look at the section on exclusions on the IPSEA website and definitely speak to SENDIS as clearly a different approach and better staff training is required.

TrafficJunkie Thu 11-May-17 08:26:38

Yes they are external exclusions. I'll take a look at the website.

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