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Waiting for results of Dyslexia assessment & feeling so alone (long post).(6 Posts)
I'm completely new to this so bear with me. DS is 7 and in yr2. He had part of his assessment on Tuesday and has to wait for another two weeks for it to be comleted. I have tried to explain to DS as carefully as I can that this isn't a test it's just a special teacher coming to see if he needs any extra help and he has accepted that and is very happy.
TBH, I do believe that the assessment will show he has some sort of learning difficulty. He is exceptionally bright and curious about the world and ask questions about his surrounding. His reading isn't quite up to the level that his teacher would like, but he is making such fantastic improvements that I am very happy with that. His numeracy is also very good, he is also very good at science and history. He is a natural sportsman and can play any sport instantly.
However, he has always struggled with his writing. He has great difficulty in concentrating and does not flurish under noisy environments (In a class of 30, that's not helpful). He struggles over words for example when looking at a watch, he will struggle to find the word and then settle for clock insted etc. Sometimes it's difficult to get his full attention too.
I will not be disappointed in him because I believe he can be anything he wants to be if he has the determination, and I will be behind him 100% of the way. I've looked at some websites and am trying so hard to make changes in the home.
For example, making extra praise when he does a chore or uses his own intiative. He bottles things up and then loses control of his temper because he doesnt have the words to express himself so I make a point of us chatting on the stairs when we come home so home is a safe haven, as he's been bullied on and off for three yrs.
My problem is I am trying so hard to be positive and strong for him, look after DD who is poorly atm and run a home that I feel so swamped by things. DF has a stressful job and he's not handleing this very well. He doesn't have much patience and that's what Jack needs. Last night DS had karate and was struggling to concentrate and was pulled up by instructor. DF made such a big thing about it, called DS an embarresment and made DS cry.
After DS &DD went to bed, I had 'words' with him and he just seemed to be saying if DS is dyslexic he's going to wash his hand of him. I know he's hurting too, but that was so hurtful. I don't have anyone to turn to. My parents and sister live 100's miles away and my mom is seriously ill too so can't talk to her. Imoved to be closer to DF and lost contact with alot of my friends , and the moms at DS's school I don't know well enough to open up to.
Last night I just sat in DS'S room and sobbed my heart out. He's such a lovely little boy and I want to help him the best that I can. I feel like I'm leaving my DD out too. But on top of this I feel so lonely in dealing with this.
Would love to hear if anyone has had any similar experiences.
Ali x x x
Sounds as if your DS may have Auditory Processing Disorder as the underlying cognitive cause of his dyslexic symptom.
Have a look at the APDUK web site, where we try to explain some of the related issues
Hi Ali, this so takes me back a while, here's my blog address I've been at this a few years now http://matthewstory.blogspot.com/ , you are doing the right thing in being suppotive. You can make a huge difference to your son, keep praising up those things he does well.
Keep postive you have caught this early, there's lots of way you and the school can help, it won't always be easy, but all us parents can do is to keep at it.
It's really sad his DF isn't more supportive at the moment, but it is probably a shock to him as his son is not the "ideal" way he invisiged, but I'm sure when he understands more about dyslexia he will really appreciate his son's strengths.
Word finding difficulties makes things fustrating but my son seems to have come out the othe side of that, still occasionally there are problems.
Please pm me if you need any more support, your not alone by any means.
Hugs from Lesley
Thank you both so much for your replies and advice. It means all the world to me that there are other parents who have experienced this and come out the otherside. I'm still waiting for the results of his assessment and have taken to phoning the LEA daily to question when the results will be avaliable. I also see the Head Teacher DAILY to question her too.
It's heartbreaking waiting, and watching him struggle.
As far as my DF, we watched a programme made by Kara Tointon about her dyslexia and that has really helped him to understand what Dyslexia is. He also apologized to our DS and to me, I can honeslty say it was shock on his part and he has been an immense support since then.
Thanks for your email Leslie, and I'll look at your blog for advice.
Many thanks and hugs ladies x x x
Hi Ali, glad to hear things have leveled out now, the programme with Kara Tointon was very good wasn't it? If your Ed Psych is as good as ours you'll have lots of support and advice.
Take care x
Have come to this a bit late on, but just wanted to say that you are doing the right thing by your child. My dd was assessed at the beginning of yr3 & it was the best decision we made. Everything suddenly became clear to all of us, I think I was particularly hard on my dd beforehand - not understanding why she wasn't 'getting' it. Afterwards, we all had a better understanding of how she saw the world and 'processes' it. She is now in yr5 and doing so much better. We still have to fight for support in school and I can't pretend we still don't have periods of frustration. Continue to bug the school for help and support.... will be worth it. Take care & stay strong, it is an emotional time for you, along with DS & DF.
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