Going to see GP about DD3 - fobbed off by school again....long rant !

[galen]

I have been up to talk to DD3 (aged 5)teacher again today and am getting very fed up of the standard response: "yes she is significantly behind, but she may catch up"
Anyway as I am becoming increasingly concerned about her I have made an app with the GP for tomorrow to request an assessment at the Developmental Asessment Unit.
I have decided that I know her best, and I am fed up of school telling me to "wait a bit longer to see how she gets on"
The thing is I have 6 DC, and yes they are all different, and no I dont compare them as such but I KNOW that there a lot of thinbgs nt right about DD3
She doesnt interact the same way with the world as other children - sounds odd but hinestly she just doesnt. She will go up to other children and stroke their face, she totally invades peoples personal space, hates being hugged. She hates roundabouts - screams hysterically,wont wear certain materials, Has total meltdowns over almost anything. She is SO difficult to handle at home and is causing so much stress in the family. I feel like I have to work SO hard to have any sort of positive relationship with her. Her speach is fairly basic for a 5 yr old. She often has trouble getting a sentence together and will start it 2 or 3 times. She uses similar sounding words in the wrong context all the time. You have to be really specific when telling her things as she will really easily get the wrong end of the stick. They say she interacts Ok with the children at school, but according to my older daughter is always on her own at playtime, and says she only has one friend and never really chats about the other childrn in her class.
She is significantly behind accademically. She still struggles to write words, cant understand simple counting, can only read one or 2 words...and is begining to hate school cause she cant do the work...Yet they are still sending hokme 4 letter word spellings for her to learn and she hasnt got a clue!

I have been to see her teacher today and had a long chat with her - but still feel a bit fobbed off .

The thing is she has ALWYAYS seemed different. She slept through the night at 7weeks old ( great I thought at the time - but not at all what my other 5 dc did lOL) Would sleep LOADS as a baby - I often had to wake her in the day to feed. When awake would sit happily in her baby ring with a toy for hours if left (not that we did) but never seemed to look for or need attention...
in fact she was such an easy baby...until she turned 2 then all hell broke loose.....

She is such a source of constant stress and argument in the family. She winds up the other DC terribly. I feel like I have almost no relationship with her at all....and it is breaking my heart.

Dont know why I'm posting this really...just anxious about tomorrow and so hope I dont get fobbed off again as this is driving me mad.,
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would love to hear any views or tips.
TIA

[Marne]

Hi, she sounds similar to my dd1, she has Aspergers, although her school work is ok (she's ahead) but she is slow at doing her work. Dd1 invades peoples personal space, hates being hugged (unless on her terms) and is happy to play on her own in the playground (although she has lots of friends). Dd1 can be hard work at home but seems to cope well at school.

Dd1 was a poor sleeper (unlike your dd) and did'nt sleep through the night until she was 4 , her sister(who is autistic) slept through the night as a baby, slept a lot during the day but is now a poor sleeper.

I think you have done the rite thing, you need to go with your instinct, dd1's school still argue with me about dd1 having nothing wrong with her even though she has a diagnosis.

Good luck for tomorrow, make sure you write a list of your concerns to take with you because i always find my mind goes blank when you get there.

[galen]

Marne, thanks for your reply.
It is really confusing someimes because she isn't so bad at school that they immediately can pin point anything, but there are just SO many different things that dont add up, and there is a lot more worrying behaviour that we see at home, and I feel that by keeping being told to "wait a bit longer" we are not helping DD at all.
Good point about a list. Will sit down and jot some stuff down I think. Thanks.

[galen]

well I have been to the Gp...got the impression he just wanted to get us out ASAP, but he has agreed to refer her to the developmental assessment unit...so now we just have to wait...again lol...