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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on SN.

4 year old with sleep issues & developement

(6 Posts)
vanessaw200 Thu 27-Aug-09 19:07:04


I've copied my messages, my 2nd message is my response to the replies and a bit more info from the other thread.

Since my daughter been born, we have had problems with her sleep. I've seen Health Visitors, private sleep clinics and been to see the community paeditrician and the specialist Health Visitor but none have been off any help. It wasn't until she was 3 and half that she started to sleep through. Whilst it would that she sleeps through, we still can't get to sleep more than 10 hours. But she still seems to be tired, her eyes look tired and she constantly yawning. Her behaviour is quite bad as she is quite hyper, constantly on the move, always fidgeting, runs around in circles, throws herself around. She doesn't maintain eye contact, never or rarely answers questions, hardly any concentration skills ( which was picked up by her playgroup/preschool), constantly flits from activity to activity. Playgroup had to speak to me a few times about her behaviour, (they even asked me to talk to a Health Visitor) they knew she had sleep problems, even her swimming teacher had words. Bedtime can be tortorous, she gets even more hyper to the point you have to hold her down just to get her hair comb,she literally goes mad, arms and legs flinging about, she does self settle but it takes ages and she constantly moves and fidgets about until she falls asleep. We do have a good bedtime routine as we've been told.

A friend has said she thinks that there's something not quite right about my daughter as well.

We've realised that her sleep is cause of some of her behaviour, and need to know how do we get her to sleep more ???? or is there a more underlying problem ??

Many Thanks for your replies.

We actually got 10 hours and 40 mins sleep out of her last night, woohoo! a calmer child today.

Crackersinbed - we've been through the bedtime routine with all the experts, who say that it's ok, after a bit of tweeking i.e low lights, warm bath, warm milk, straight to room and into pyjamas and hair combed and then into bed for stories in low light, we try to keep it quiet and calm. It can be during bathtime if she gets upset for whatever reason, that the behaviour changes and she gets hysterical and whilst trying to do her hair it gets impossiable but thats every night. Unfortunatley she's finished at playgroup but they felt she had some sort of problems on the autistic spectrum, if only mild, due to reactions of hers whilst at playgroup i.e crying when the vacum cleaner was on. She hates handdryers, drills, hairdryers, vacum cleaner, lawnmowers anything like these. I've spoken to the HV several times, sorry the woman daft!lol,

Bubblagirl - The hair combing of a night is like dealing with a wriggling worm gone mad and take your point about being sensitive to her head but sometimes in the morning she comes in the shower with me (oh joy) and after I comb her hair out and she's fine.

Lingle - I maywell come over to the SN thread I think I need help, my hubby is certain there's something not quite right.

I think what also concerns us is that she seems to be in a different world sometimes. I know they have imaginary world but all the time???

Toilet training seems to have regressed lately as she keeps wetting herself and won't go to the toilet and is now getting sore and a rash but that might be typical 4 year old behaviour ?????

She loves arts and crafts and cooking but she don't do what you ask of her. It's quite hard to instruct how to do things as she won't listen.

It's taken me over 3 years to stop her from harassing the cat, poor cat will need therapy soon.

I sometimes feel quite infuriated with her cos it's such hard work, constant repeating myself, her not listening, lack of eye contact etc

I'm trying to get her to use her cutlery at meal times but she won't unless I'm constantly at her.

What do you think ??? Is it lack of sleep or something else



TotalChaos Thu 27-Aug-09 20:01:10

Hi Vanessa. I wouldn't want to assume it's lack of sleep causing all this. Could she have some sort of hearing problem and/or problem understanding language, as that can affect concentration, behaviour and answering questions? are you/nursery happy with her spoken language? I would go back to HV or GP (whichever you feel is a better listener and more knowledgeable!)some of what you describe - always being on the move, being funny about her hair being combed could be consistent with sensory issues (kids can be oversensitive to some things and undersensitive to others all at the same time). You might find a trampoline or letting her jump on the bed might help her burn off some energy.

my DS had a brief regression with toilet training at 4, claiming to be scared of the toilet hmm I used bribery to get round this, may be worth a go (NB I was 100% confident it was a behaviour issue not a physical problem!) Constipation or a UTI can also cause wetting btw, so worth taking her to the GP to rule out a physical cause.

vanessaw200 Thu 27-Aug-09 20:23:02

Thanks TotalChaos

We stop her jumping on the bed as she'll just fall off and plus it's brand new bed, lol

I'm going to try bribery for the toilet training, she's not constipated, just won't go to the toilet and if made to has a tantrum!!! grrrrrr

lingle Thu 27-Aug-09 21:58:00

Do you think you might find it useful to look at some books aimed at helping parents of kids on the autistic spectrum? Lots of the advice in them is good common sense and it won't do any harm to follow it even if it turns out that it's nothing to do with autistic spectrum (IYSWIM).

MojoLost Fri 28-Aug-09 09:07:22

Oh my goodness Vanessa, the issues you are dealing with sound serious enough for your health visitor to have done something. I woulnd't talk to her again, maybe best to go to your GP and ask for a referral to a child development clinic for an assessment.

My son is 4.5 and has a brain injury causing a global developmental delay. He also suffers from lack of sleep, is hyper, poor concentration, a lot of what you mention. Not saying your daughter has a brain in jury blush, just saying that the behaviour you describe is probably not standard.

I WONDERFUL mumsnetter suggested that I give him fish oils, the strawberry chews, and since starting those he concentration has improved and he is sleeping slightly better, so I would highly recommend them.
Best of luck,

claw3 Fri 28-Aug-09 10:45:13

Hi Vanessa, you have just described my 5 year old son!

It takes me about 4 hours to get him to settle to sleep as he cant calm down. He still wakes several times during the night. Its bloody tiring isnt it!

He is constantly on the move, hanging upside down and falling intentionally etc.

I cant brush his hair, his teeth, wash his face etc.

Lots of other problems too.

I would speak to your HV.

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