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DS has his ADOS test tomorrow & I am dreading it

(70 Posts)
pinkchampagne Mon 24-Aug-09 12:29:42

Have been trying not to think about it too much over the last few days as I got very upset a few weeks back when I received the appointment, but now it is tomorrow & I am dreading it. I have been told I will get a definite answer & I don't feel I am mentally ready for it - not sure I will ever be though. I know it is for the best, I know it may help him & these are positive things, but I am scared of the dx.

I am on my own with the boys & my parents are away on holiday. I am scared of how I will react if they tell me he has some kind of autism, which I suspect they will. Don't know how to prepare myself.

logi Mon 24-Aug-09 12:49:38

hi pink,when my ds had ADOS test we were told we would get a definate answer but after we were told to come back in 4 weeks for an answer we were very disappointed in this as we were preparing ourselves for it,i hope this isnt the case for you.After the four weeks still nothing definate our son is currently being assessed now over several weeks before we get the answer,we realise these things take time we just wish we werent told we were getting the results only to be sent away for 4 weeks.

pinkchampagne Mon 24-Aug-09 13:06:11

Oh no, how annoying for you. You have to really pysch yourself up for the possibilty of getting a definite dx, so to prepare for that & then get told to come back must be so frustrating.

paranoid2 Mon 24-Aug-09 13:09:47

My friends DS got an answer there and then a few months ago after the professionals had a chat about their findings. The test took place in a single session. In this case there was no ASD diagnosis. Maybe if its not clearcut there is a need to assess the results over a long time but I would have thought that some indications would be given whilst things were fresh in the profs minds.

Good luck PC. I know its been said by people here over and over again but you will come out with the same boy as you went in with. If there is a name for what he has , then so be it. If there isnt a name then he still has the same issues that need addressed. As many have said diagnosis can lead to help . There was a very good post recently by Givemesleep I think about seeing no reason to not seek a diagnosis.

Let us know how you get on if you feel up to it

paranoid2 Mon 24-Aug-09 13:15:56

I know however that its easier said than done to actively seek a diagnosis. I try and convince myself of the arguments as I have niggles about Dt2 but I have not managed to pluck up the courage to do anything mainly because nobody to date has suggested that he may be on the spectrum. He had ADD and DCD

pinkchampagne Mon 24-Aug-09 13:34:18

Thank you. I will let you know how I get on tomorrow. It helps to talk on here as there are people who know & understand what you are going through. I tend not to discuss it much in rl.

paranoid2 Tue 25-Aug-09 09:15:08

Thinking of you today. Hope you are feeling ok.

debs40 Tue 25-Aug-09 09:24:36

Good luck - hope it is not too stressful

brokenspacebar Tue 25-Aug-09 09:30:35

Pinkchampagne, I hope it goes as well as it can.

frazzledazzle Tue 25-Aug-09 09:49:05

Good luck for today,Pinkchampagne.
My DS1 is having the ADOS in a few weeks but we haven't got a date yet.
It's one thing suspecting something is 'wrong' but the idea of an official dx is hard isn't it,but they are still the same child they were before aren't they?Hopefully if our children are diagnosed support will be more available.

pinkchampagne Tue 25-Aug-09 11:22:31

Thank you all. smile Frazzledazzle - that is what I keep telling myself this morning, but not sure how together I will be later on. Hoping his dad is going to finish work early to join us as I feel it is important he is there today. We are not together but I feel he should be involved in this as it is his DS too. My lovely DP has offered to come with me for support if he cannot make it.
I have been dreading this day for weeks!

5inthebed Tue 25-Aug-09 11:23:45

Best of luck for today smile
A DX can be a god thing, you'll find help for your DS from places you never even knew existed.

paranoid2 Tue 25-Aug-09 11:43:11

My friend was convinced her DS had failed some of the tests as he didnt seem to do them very well according to her. However apparantly he displayed enough skills for the paed. So dont panic if he doesnt seem to be doing all that well at the time

Deffo take lovely DP if Ds's dad cant come.

pinkchampagne Tue 25-Aug-09 12:13:36

Just phoned ex h & he says he won't be able to get away in time. Wish he had bloody phoned me himself & let me know sooner as I don't drive. The test is at 2pm & DP will still be asleep after his night shift atm. Feeling all cross & teary, probably irrationally though.

paranoid2 Tue 25-Aug-09 12:20:47

Wake him Up!!
If he is lovely he wont mind. Its a very big day for you. Would you mind if it was the other way around? You need someone to be with you to take in all the information whatever the outcome and to provide support. Could he join you half way through the process so that he could be there for the feedback part?

bubblagirl Tue 25-Aug-09 12:28:17

good luck really hope you get on ok only just spotted thread sorry but thinking of you xx

pinkchampagne Tue 25-Aug-09 12:35:00

Have just sent a him a text so not to wake him straight up & he phoned straight away & said he is going to jump in the shower & come right over, bless him. I am still all teary, but not feeling well either which doesn't help. Will let you know how we get on later.

debs40 Tue 25-Aug-09 12:43:51

Oh, that's lovely of him. It will be so much better not to be on your own. Lots of luck x

frazzledazzle Tue 25-Aug-09 13:01:30

I'm glad you're not going alonesmile

paranoid2 Tue 25-Aug-09 13:42:39

He sounds lovely. Great to have the support

pinkchampagne Tue 25-Aug-09 17:17:48

Back now, heard what I expected to hear.sad Will post properly later.

paranoid2 Tue 25-Aug-09 17:24:45

(((hugs))) Post whenever you feel able. Have a glass/bottle of wine after your tough day.

frazzledazzle Tue 25-Aug-09 17:36:07

I hope you are all ok x

5inthebed Tue 25-Aug-09 17:54:19

Hope it went ok for you all today.

bubblagirl Tue 25-Aug-09 17:55:53

thinking of you just remember were all here for you we know exactly how you feel right now give yourself time but also think now you will get all the help you need xx

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