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Feelingbetter 1 - Social Services 0......

(11 Posts)
feelingbetter Fri 17-Jul-09 21:19:54

To everyone fighting the 'please God give us a tiny break and some help' battle - DO NOT GIVE UP.

Yesterday, I'd had it. Have had a shit week so decided to put my temper to good use and phone 'Mrs X' the purseholder for respite (she who has never bothered to speak to me, meet me, or offer any help at all, has refused all my requests for help since February on the basis that DS is 'so little'), and I demanded a meeting with her (obviously via a minion as again, she was too busy to speak to me hmm).
So, I told the poor minion (calmly and politely, yet with the tone that I could and would rip her to shreds if she dared even try to interrupt me), that Mrs X had better find the time to meet me to make her refusals to me in person and to explain exactly why and how she had decided that we were not entitled to any help without even meeting us. That she ought to tell me how I can safely leave a globally delayed, blind and epileptic child to entertain themselves whilst I 'run the home' (one of her previous enlightened suggestions - right up there with 'she can take him in with her when she cleans the bathroom').
Then I suggested that instead of meeting with me, I would put it all in writing to her and she could respond in writing within 7 working days, which I would then use to appeal, to instigate a complaints procedure, and would seek advice as to the legality of her refusals.

And do you know what? She STILL didn't ring me back angry but got her poor minion to do it and, lo and behold, our short term (6 weeks of 3 x 1 hourly session per week awarded whilst I was very ill and hospitalised) respite has been continued indefinitely, to be reviewed at our request gringringrin as we feel our requirements change. It's not much, but it's a foot in the door.

So keep at the buggars! Everything is on our side, they just need to know that we know that, and that we are not Mums to be messed with.
In my case, Mrs X was well aware that I had already made numerous written complaints with regards to DS, so was in no doubt that I would not hesitate to start it with her.

Wouldn't have done any of it without the help and advice on here, so thanks!

mysonben Fri 17-Jul-09 21:25:16

Good on you for winning the upper hand on this one! smile
You must feel satisfied with yourself ,i know i would be ...(i'm a wimp most of the time when it comes to pushing and fighting)

monstermansmum Fri 17-Jul-09 21:32:41

Well done-good for you and little fbb! "He who shouts loudest ....etc"!!!

lou031205 Fri 17-Jul-09 23:01:08

Well done!

jemmm Sat 18-Jul-09 07:33:42

Well done feelingbetter - if it gives anyone else encouragement, then we had a bit of a win with SS last week too.

After weeks of wrangling over support over the summer, they said that much as they'd like to, the bureaucracy involved meant it was impossible. I said well, you pay for my NT DD's nursery, that frees up some cash for me to get the respite in personally - no bureaucracy involved problems solved...

Silence from SS... followed by - ok oh then.

So feelingbetter is right - you've just got to keep at them.

sarah293 Sat 18-Jul-09 08:54:04

Message withdrawn

5inthebed Sat 18-Jul-09 08:56:22

Well done.

Hassled Sat 18-Jul-09 09:03:18

Well done - the power of sheer bloody- mindedness and persistence is a wonderful thing to behold .

BriocheDoree Sat 18-Jul-09 09:55:28

Well done!! You shouldn't have to fight but it seems to work.
How's your little man doing? (He's sooooo cute...)

vjg13 Sat 18-Jul-09 10:24:03

Well done! smile You are so right to post on here and give hope to others. I totally agree with the 'foot in the door'. We started with 2 hours per week direct payments which was dismal but now get 5 which is a bit less dismal!!

trace2 Sat 18-Jul-09 13:23:01

well done you!!! we are trying to get help at moment dh very depressed am not very good with having a split hip and have chloe with her health problems and jack with his aspergers .

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