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blunt letter from neuro.

(16 Posts)
sarah293 Sat 11-Jul-09 07:06:06

Message withdrawn

Hassled Sat 11-Jul-09 07:23:28

I'm so sorry - I know you'd been told that, but to have it there in black and white must be unbearable for you. I wish I could think of something constructive to say. The letter seems so pointless, though - what did he/she hope to achieve by sending it?

ShannaraTiger Sat 11-Jul-09 07:35:18

Riven I'm really sorry, that letter does seem overly blunt and without emotion. I can't think of anything helpful to say, enjoy all the times you have together and build up loads of happy family memorys.

TotalChaos Sat 11-Jul-09 07:38:51

Sorry you are getting such heartbreaking news, it's shit and unfair, and I'm sorry there's nothing we can do to make it better other than listen xxx

saintlydamemrsturnip Sat 11-Jul-09 09:06:17

I think that letter is totally inappropriate unless it has been written to allow her to access services for children with life limiting conditions (and if so there should be a way of highlighting that for service providers without sending a letter like that to a parent).

Because whilst she has a potentially life limiting condition none of those doctors can see into the future and she could well outlive any of them. Perhaps they'd like a letter back reminding them of that.

I'm sorry Riven, I think that letter is awful, and I know I've told you before but I just wanted to say again about the person I know with CP similar to your dd's level, whose mother was told 'it's time to let her go' when she was 8 who is now in her mid 30's.

These people do not know what is going to happen.

misscutandstick Sat 11-Jul-09 13:13:45

Mrs Turnip i was thinking the same thing: a while back i remember them saying to riven the same thing about her being 10yrs old. and now its (calously to say the least angry) been raised to 18yrs.

Steven Hawkins is in his 60's and he was supposed to survive 30!

WetAugust Sat 11-Jul-09 16:45:05

The letter could have been a lot more acceptable if it had been composed with some humanity. It was a letter to you, her parents, after all, not a letter between medics.

I too was hopping mad he other day seeing Dr A write to Dr B about "the individual". (i.e. my son). Why not say 'young person', or 'my patient' - "the individual" is jut so austere. Must be something about the doctors in this part of the world

Frasersmum123 Sat 11-Jul-09 16:51:43

Im shocked at the bluntness of the letter. They could have written it in a much more compassionate way. Sorry they have done this to you Riven

anonandlikeit Sat 11-Jul-09 17:09:17

What was the purpose of sending such a letter, were you expecting to recieve it? Had you asked for it in writing for some reason?

If not the neuro is cruel arse!

lou031205 Sat 11-Jul-09 17:27:10

<<Whispers>> Neuro's tend to get caught up in the science, and forget there is a person around the brain IME (I used to work with them).

magso Sat 11-Jul-09 17:39:20

Riven I am so sorry. ((hug))
The same message, if it had to be written at all, could have been expressed differently.

flyingmum Sat 11-Jul-09 17:44:00

Riven, how horrible for you. I know you know it already but what a blunt yuck letter. I can only assume its some sort of arse covering on their behalf in case of some perceived litigation.

You must feel like writing back something really sarky like
Dear Neuro

Having met with you on several occasions I acknowledge your assessment of DD. However, it is clear that due to the severity of your inhumanity and lack of feeling in your last blunt missive, that your milk of human kindness has run out. It is my conclusion, therefore, that you are unlikely to acquire a bedside manner before retirement date.

Sending virtual chocolate

Phoenix4725 Sat 11-Jul-09 19:03:33

sorry Riven sad

daisy5678 Sun 12-Jul-09 16:44:05

Maybe he was writing it so that you could have access to the hospice, cos didn't you have to 'prove' that she was life-limited?

Still not nice to get, but I hope it was written for a decent purpose.

mysonben Sun 12-Jul-09 16:50:31

I'm sorry. sad
What an awful letter THAT man has sent you, he clearly has no regards for peoples' feelings.

Greensleeves Sun 12-Jul-09 16:51:32

fucking hell

what a terrible letter to send to a parent angry

so sorry Riven sad

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