Talk

Advanced search

Here some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on SN.

Right I have identified what is pissing me right off

(12 Posts)
hereidrawtheline Wed 01-Jul-09 21:36:35

I do not ever control my time. Well I do sometimes I am sure but I just dont. This morning I had plans to take DS out and get some stuff sorted for DH's birthday on Friday. DS has meltdown then says he wants to go to sleep. So I say fine. Put him to bed and make a cup of tea deciding to begin the work that needs doing at home instead and run errands after DS naps. Then 15 mins later DS gets up and has a cheeky grin and says he doesnt want to sleep anymore. So I finish my tea and then we go out. I am massively paraphrasing.

So finally we leave and I realised I had spent 2 and a half hours just trying to get one stupid thing done and get out of the house and in the process was punched in the face and hit with a stick. I was so angry about this. Then the usual out of house trauma. Then we get home DS does nap and I continue working. Then during nap a workman comes - unannounced - to fix our electrics (we rent privately and said a while ago they were messed up, we have no bathroom light) I said, well sorry but I had no idea you were coming at all, let alone, today, at this time, and DS is napping and I am NOT letting him wake up because you are working in the bathroom which is right next to DS's bedroom! He'd only been asleep 30 mins and it is the only time of day I am not on DS duty! So he was in a huff but really... isnt that what appointments and phones are for??? So he left.

I worked. A while later DS woke up. 2 workmen come again at 2 different times to do 2 different jobs (one the electrician I had sent away earlier) Then I bought the Zapp (nice thing)

DH was doing dinner but tried a new recipe which was not successful so come 830 we were just sitting down to eat and DS had wanted to go to bed earlier but wanted dinner first. I begin to eat and DS wants more drink so I get it for him. Then DS needs things cutting up for him. And so on.

Then DH takes DS into his room to put him to bed and DH is telling DS a story DS loves and there is a point I have to enter the room and say my line. And I am sat in bed trying to relax and I hear my cue loudly shouted out so I fucking heave myself up and go say my goddamned line and begin my part of the routine of putting DS to sleep. Then DH goes to get him his bottle of milk and guess what he has used the last of the milk in the recipe that failed for dinner. So he has to go out to the fucking shops in the car while I sit and keep DS company. It is 9:30 at night I have just left DS in his room he is still awake and I am steaming angry that all day I have not been in control of one stinking minute.

And for the record we are not normally so totally ill prepared for everything DH doesnt normally try new recipes and I cant remember the last time we ran out of milk so it isnt shit lack of routine making DS melt down all the time. But this is a pretty accurate example of how my time is spent.

Add to this all day I have had a migraine and been taking co-codamol to keep the pain at bay so I am a little dopey and I am so angry right now I am worried I will have a hard time going to sleep too so am going to take a sleeping pill. And I thought my cat had died but he was just torturing me.

Sorry I needed to rant.

bubblagirl Wed 01-Jul-09 21:49:26

oh poor you , <<<sending big hugs, warm drink and good nights sleep i hope>>>>>

your day sounds really stressful but you are doing everything right its a challenging time

have no real words of wisdom but i know what your going through x

hereidrawtheline Wed 01-Jul-09 21:53:16

thats alright, thank you I just needed to do a virtual scream. At dinner when I had to get him another drink I just thought I'm a slave!

He is sweetness and light many times too so its a happiness in slavery but god if only I didnt not dance like a bloody marionette!

amberflower Wed 01-Jul-09 22:10:44

Oh bless you that sounds like a day and a half...I hope you have a large glass of wine in your hand now smile

Sometimes you just feel like you exist to dance to their tune and can never achieve anything! Does your DS do preschool and if so how often does he attend? Do you get any 'me time' that way? It can be really hard if things are just relentless without a break...do you ever leave your DS just with DH, say at a weekend, so you can have a bit of time to yourself or get things done that are quicker done without toddler in tow?

I have to say I would also have gone NUTS with my DH if he had decided to try a new recipe for DS at that time of night! By 8:30 I expect DS to be well and truly in the land of nod and he's two years older than your little one...if he has not hit the hay by 7:30 I seriously start to lose the will to live!

I hope tomorrow is better for you...

mysonben Wed 01-Jul-09 22:15:36

I hope you get a nice relaxing night you deserve it ! I totally sympatize with the "slave " bit wink

hereidrawtheline Wed 01-Jul-09 22:30:56

thanks I knew you would all understand.

I was trying to not be angry at DH we are really trying to work on our relationship and he read a recipe that said 30 mins so he started it at 6 I think. But I was angry but not verbally! grin

DS is asleep now and I darent touch wine after all the blooming pills I've had but I did have a decaf tea and now I am going to sleep!!!!

DS goes to preschool 2 mornings a week (one of which is tomorrow!) which is lovely, I get around 2 1/2 hours home alone between runs. Most of the time I end up working though. I am trying to make the Independent pay me for writing grin and tomorrow I have to finalise stuff for DH's bday on Friday. But next Tuesday when DS is in school I solemnly swear to laze about on MN! grin Even if I take 30 mins tomorrow to do something nice for me it will be a huge improvement on... nothing!

bubblagirl Thu 02-Jul-09 09:03:06

hope you have a better day today <<<sending god happy vibes>>>

lingle Thu 02-Jul-09 09:10:41

I snorted about the bedtime story bit. You'll not get that kind of language into The Independent though.............

I if suggested a hobby for evenings would I just get the sound of hollow laughter?

hereidrawtheline Thu 02-Jul-09 09:38:53

yes lingle I swear when I am very angry and fed up. ugh.

Today was worse. See my terrible mother thread.

Technically my hobby is writing and reading! I do a lot of reading before sleep and I work hard on my writing but it involves a lot of thinking and research sometimes such as the piece I am working on now about Bertrand Russell shock which is madness itself.

lingle Thu 02-Jul-09 10:00:28

I play violin it's nice because you don't think in words...........

not so nice for the neighbours though!!!! I'm no Sherlock Holmes.

hereidrawtheline Thu 02-Jul-09 10:33:51

oh I would love to play an instrument!! Like the violin or piano. My neighbours would go ballistic they seem to be in a spasm just because someone under 60 is living in this house.

I do love writing & I love words. But sometimes it buzzes around my head too much!

magso Thu 02-Jul-09 10:47:44

I can sympathise with not feeling in control and acheiving very little! I still feel like ds's slave and he is nearly 10 ( Ok he has LD so has needs similar to a preschooler and is extroadinary messy)! I seem to spend all my nonworking days cleaning up after 'Mr Messy' ( I do not call Ds that out loud but it makes me smile - Ds likes Mr Men!)and washing!
Ah hobbies - what a thought! Dh bought me an electric violin - so it is silent grin( play with headphones) but it isn't the same!
Hope today is better!
I like to put jobs - very little jobs on the chalk board and generously cross through when acheived. Makes it look like I have done something afterall!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now