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Heart and soul (sad, but please advise if you have experience of this)

(5 Posts)
hellzapoppin Fri 05-Jun-09 21:43:35

My close friend's beautiful baby was born with a minor heart defect. At 8 weeks doctors realised it was more serious and they had to operate or it would prove fatal.
After major op they fixed the heart, but complications afterwards left the baby brain damaged.
Her once alert little baby can no longer feed, swallow or recognize her.

Has anyone experienced this?
How did you come to terms with the change in your baby (and motherhood as you imagined it was going to be)?
How can I help her through these early devastating days?
Any advice would be much appreciated.

anonandlikeit Fri 05-Jun-09 22:56:38

Hi Hellz, no real experience so just bumping for you.
DS2 was born very prem so his disabilities emerged rather than were suddenly there iykwim.

I imagine just being there for your friend will be enough, she must eb feeling so many mixed emotions.

sarah293 Sat 06-Jun-09 08:24:51

Message withdrawn

hellzapoppin Sat 06-Jun-09 21:18:39

Anon and Riven- thank you both so much for your replies.

MojoLost Sun 07-Jun-09 05:56:22

Oh, this is so heartbreaking. So sorry for your friend.
I realised something was wrong with my DS's development by about 4months. By 12 months it was confirmed he had brain damage (I really do not like that term to be honest). I was devastated but decided to do EVERYTHING in my power to help him reach his full potential (whatever it is). That has been my main driver these 4 years.

Early intervention is key, and it works. The more stimulation the baby receives (at home and by professionals) the better.

On a different note, if the baby was brain damaged due to negligence, then I urge her to try and get compensation (I know this will be the last thing in her mind at this moment). Getting therapies, equipment, books, etc can be costly.

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