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You can all call me an old cow but I'm fed up with SN board being used as resource for general advice

(297 Posts)
Davros Mon 18-Apr-05 17:48:48

We seem to have had a spate of threads started by parents who have worries about their child's behaviour and development. Most of these don't seem to have looked through the SN archive (although I have told Tech it only goes up to D it certainly covers Autism, Aspgergers, ASD). I don't want to be totally horrid but I wonder if people could have a little sensitvity into our situations and check the archive or simply post in B&D where I think most of these threads would be more appropriate.
I wasn't going to say anything as I thought it was just a phase and would stop but then two more appeared.
OK, call me an old cow.

lou33 Mon 18-Apr-05 17:54:27

you are an old cow

Davros Mon 18-Apr-05 17:59:00


Blossomhill Mon 18-Apr-05 17:59:29

Which posts Davros. I'll e-mail u as I was going to anyway!

WideWebWitch Mon 18-Apr-05 18:00:17

But people want to ask somewhere where someone with some experience might look, what's wrong with that? If you want a recipe you'll post in recipes, if you're concerned about ASD you're likely to post in Special Needs I suppose, I don't understand the problem tbh.

tamum Mon 18-Apr-05 18:00:37

Even I noticed, and it's none of my business. Thee have been loads, and the few I've looked at seem to be saying very similar things. It did strike me as pretty insensitive. Maybe every parent sees their own situation as different from everyone else's and wants individualised reassurance, but I can't really see why you should all have to be the ones to provide it. I agree, using B and D would be more appropriate.

ladymuck Mon 18-Apr-05 18:00:54

I certainly sympathise, but there is also a trend for certain posts on the B&D threads to be refered onto here. Please don't blame the posters - they're looking for any help that they can get, and actually the archive isn't that helpful unless you know exactly what it is that you need to know, and how other people would have referred to it. They're just looking to tap into your hard-earned expertise.

Gwenick Mon 18-Apr-05 18:02:56

HAve to confesss as the mum of 2 NT children I'd probably use the B&D board for advice initially, obviosuly if one of them was diagnosed with 'something' then I'd come over here - but I think in general it's a bit 'off' if people are just posting about what could quite well just be naughty little brats

DISCLAIMER - I haven't read any of the recent posts so I'm not directing that last comment at anyone in particular, although I did have a RL "friend" who's child was a brat and she 'blamed' it on ADHD - but it turns out he didn't have it, was simply badly behaved.

WideWebWitch Mon 18-Apr-05 18:03:19

I should probably shut up as I haven't seen any of the threads you're on about!

Enid Mon 18-Apr-05 18:04:08


This is what comes of having too many topics.

I told you so

Blossomhill Mon 18-Apr-05 18:05:14

Er we need special needs Enid. This is one of theimportant ones and a lifeline ot us mums with sn kids.

rickman Mon 18-Apr-05 18:05:52

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Gwenick Mon 18-Apr-05 18:06:06

and surely B&D is a completely different thing which also warrants it's own board - like how do I stop my DS2 climbing on the dining room table ARGHHHHHHHHHHH

Gwenick Mon 18-Apr-05 18:08:10

no rickman, I don't think that's what people are saying, I'm sure many people that have posted stuff on here with concerns about their children have had them looked into further and discovered that it was just a 'phase'. Likewise others could be told that they're being referred for more tests - in which case they'd probably come onto SN as their child(ren) could well be coming into that category.

Davros Mon 18-Apr-05 18:11:02

I'm all for MN being here to help people and I haven't actually posted on any of these threads which is always an option (mostly because I was too busy but because it was getting very repetitive). I know that lots of MNers read the SN boards but don't post as we all do in many topics. Anyone who did that would already have quite a lot of info and could still try the archive. I do think its rather insensitive. I spend A LOT of my time helping and advising other parents but find it frustrating when they've done little research for themselves and use me as a short cut. Giving advice does take its toll on you as its not something to be done lightly.

rickman Mon 18-Apr-05 18:11:04

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cod Mon 18-Apr-05 18:11:33

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Blossomhill Mon 18-Apr-05 18:12:16

Oh there u are. I have questions I need anwering cod

cod Mon 18-Apr-05 18:12:35

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rickman Mon 18-Apr-05 18:13:04

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Blossomhill Mon 18-Apr-05 18:13:08

I just want you to talk straight with me cod for once !!!!!!

Davros Mon 18-Apr-05 18:14:21

I certainly don't think someone should have a child with a dx before coming to SN, in fact we have lots who don't. I don't know what I'm saying really, I just felt it was getting repetitive, we were being used as a short cut (which is fine on MN most of the time) but we have huge emotional, time, financial, practical etc etc resources used up by this side of our lives, it isn't the same as asking how to clean the oven (which I must check btw). I did say I was being an old cow!

Davros Mon 18-Apr-05 18:15:43

Hey Cod, No 4!!

Enid Mon 18-Apr-05 18:17:47

oh yes alright I suppose special needs is ok <<she says grudgingly>>

Blossomhill Mon 18-Apr-05 18:18:22

Enid - do not mess with a sn mum. We are all well 'ard

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