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my 6 year old hfa was not invited to his friend's birthday party today [sad]

(43 Posts)
Deeeja Thu 29-Jan-09 22:17:28

I know I am used to this by now, but I feel sad and can't stop crying about it. I pick up this child from school and take him home everyday, and my ds considers him to be his friend. When he got home his mother gleefully told me about the party at an adventure centre and 'oh sorry, forgot to invite your ds'.
my boy would have loved it there.
Some other boys in his class will be going, and he will know, and will be upset about it tomorrow.
I feel like telling her I can't collect her ds tomorrow, but then my ds will have even less friends.
These people make me sick, am just fed up with having to deal with their stupidity all the time.

5inthebed Thu 29-Jan-09 22:23:38

Your poor S. I feel very sad for him and really angry at that stupid woman for being so so rude! What si with people at the moment exluding our dc from parties!

sarah573 Thu 29-Jan-09 22:25:36

OK well maybe now you've remembered you could send him his invite!! angry angry

sad for your DS.

Niftyblue Thu 29-Jan-09 22:30:45

At the silly mother

Your ds does not need friends with mums that pull dirty tactless stints like that

Sidge Thu 29-Jan-09 22:33:23

That is just crap sad

Maybe you could forget to take her son home from school?

macwoozy Fri 30-Jan-09 08:17:39

OMG what a bitchangry I just don't get how people can act like this, it's beyond me.

2shoes Fri 30-Jan-09 08:20:08


TotalChaos Fri 30-Jan-09 08:28:04

selfish cow. does she think you were born yesterday.

Coldtits Fri 30-Jan-09 08:29:18

What a twat! \angry

mm22bys Fri 30-Jan-09 08:30:16


How dare she?

I would honestly refuse to take him home anymore. You just don't "use" people that way in my books!

Coldtits Fri 30-Jan-09 08:31:19

People who don't have to deal with a child who doesn't quite 'fit' have no concept of how desperate you can be for any invitations. Ds1 has been invited NOWHERE since reception.

Poshpaws Fri 30-Jan-09 08:31:53

OMG. The party has not even taken place yet and she tells you she forgot to invite your DS and then does not go on to invite him there and then?????

And she still expects you to pick up her son?


mm22bys Fri 30-Jan-09 08:35:51

I think you need to have this out with her (in a nice way of course). If her DS is a friend of your DSs I can see that you would not necessarily want to alienate your boy even further by not taking his friend home.

You need to let her know how you are feeling. She needs to know what it's like to have your child rejected.

I don't think you necessarily want to get an invite for your DS at this stage (you want him invited not out of pity), but she does need to know how hurt you are.

If at that point yes she is a bitch and I would not take her boy home any more....

mm22bys Fri 30-Jan-09 08:37:38

Sorry got cut off.

Meant to say...

If that point she still doesn't show a little more sympathy and understanding yes she is a bitch and you would be right in not agreeing to take her boy home anymore.

(Do you take turns? Apart from the two boys being friends what do you get out of it?)

mm22bys Fri 30-Jan-09 08:39:09

Oh and if your two boys ARE friends surely her boy would have wanted yours invited anyway???

belgo Fri 30-Jan-09 08:42:06

agree with mm22bys. I would be furious with this mother.

2pt4kids Fri 30-Jan-09 08:47:13

Could you say to her today, 'So what time does the party start then tonight? I know you forgot to send the actual invite with the details on so would you mind just letting me know now so I can write it down. DS is really looking forward to it!'
In a kind of 'assuming her telling you about the party was a belated invitation' way...
Shame her into having a bit of decency!

troutpout Fri 30-Jan-09 09:47:25


DorotheaPlenticlew Fri 30-Jan-09 09:51:53

sad also.

DorotheaPlenticlew Fri 30-Jan-09 09:52:12

Actually I meant angry.

snowleopard Fri 30-Jan-09 09:58:25

Could she have possibly meant she forgot to invite him but he is actually invited? After all she told you all about it... surely if she was deliberately not inviting him she would have tried to keep it quiet? (unless she's a TOTAL bitch!) I would phone her and just ask for clarification - "I know you forgot to invite DS but I'm afraid I'm a bit muddled about it - he is invited isn't he?" If it's "No" then you can say - "but I don't understand - he is x's close friend, have we done something to upset you?"

hereidrawtheline Fri 30-Jan-09 10:09:28

I dont understand this. If she didnt indeed invite your son in a silly way by telling you she had forgotten to invite him then she is a truly awful woman. Why would you do that to a child? And poor you in a bad situation you either drive this woman's son around while she acts like a bitch or you deprive your own DS of a much wanted friend. I do not envy you that. You need to have it out with her. I am very sorry for you.

chloesmumtoo Fri 30-Jan-09 10:18:50

I know it is awful and I dont condone how she has stupidly handled it but maybe she only had a limited amount of children she could take. She may have let her son choose who he wanted. Giving a lift to her son is very nice but maybe doesnt garantee an invite. Although she obviously owes you big time for all the daily school runs. Probably the least she could do to repay your kindness. However maybe they have not been getting on as good lately or there is some other reason. In that case she should certainly not be relying on you in this way. Maybe best to try to get out of the lift situation, you may be being used.

chloesmumtoo Fri 30-Jan-09 10:20:09

Did you only start doing it because of their friendship?

mm22bys Fri 30-Jan-09 10:22:52

But if she really didn't want her (OP's) DS at the party, then why even mention it?

Maybe it was a back-handed invitation?

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