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Bibic - I have finally managed to feel as though I can move on

(40 Posts)
Blossomhill Tue 05-Apr-05 21:55:08

As you all know the trip to Bibic was an amazing time for my whole family.
For all of you that have known me for the year+ I have been on mumsnet will know just how much of a rollercoaster we have been on. We have asd/adhd/not asd/not adhd. Just didn't know whether I was coming or going (as you all know as I turned to you lot for support) and it took so much out of me. It wasn't so much the actual dx itself but the is she/isn't she? feeling that was actually tearing me apart. I'd be like that's an auti triat/oh that's adhd, just scrutinising everything that she did and it wasn't fair on her or me, any of us really.
So when I spoke to Bibic today and they told me the results of the CARS test (and they were very thorough, took about 2 days I believe as they really wanted to get it right) was that she wasn't even mildly autistic or even borderline. She came out in the normal range which I am obviously pleased about as I think deep down I always knew it but had so many different people telling me there opinion it clouded my judgement of what I was really thinking.
Dd still does have quite significant social/communication difficulties and I know we have a rocky road ahead whatever they call it so nothing has changed in that respect, just I know which direction we are heading.
I wanted to say thanks to all of you who have given me advice and still will give me advice.
I have met some lovely people on here, real true friends and I wanted to say I am sorry if I have sounded like a stuck record. I bet you have all breathed a sigh of relief too. Thanks again for listening, it really means a lot. Blossom xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jayzmummy Tue 05-Apr-05 22:03:16

Blossy....I know only too well how you can become so very confused by everything that is said when looking for support from open forums like this.

As you know I was a frequent visitor to another site and no longer visit there anymore....I was so convinced J had Aspergers....but when I came here, after you flagged up MN to me, I soon became to learn that it was highly unlikely.

I just knew BIBIC would be a brilliant starting place for you. Now you can move on with a clearer picture of what DD needs in her life.

Im just so glad that things are clearer for you now and hope and pray that dd gets all she needs to flourish.

I know how worried you have been and how much you have deliberated over dd's problems. Now look at this as a fresh start and build upon dd's strengths and sit back and relax.

What have you got to be sorry for?????

emmatmg Tue 05-Apr-05 22:07:42

BH, it sounds as though you're leaving, you're not are you?

(Sorry for being ignorant to it but what is BIBIC?)

Jayzmummy Tue 05-Apr-05 22:11:28

British institute For Brain Injured Children....assesment centre in Somerset.

emmatmg Tue 05-Apr-05 22:15:41

Oh, bum......really sorry.

I am ignorant and feel shitty now.

coppertop Tue 05-Apr-05 22:28:06

Nothing to apologise for, BH.

I think it's fantastic that you've finally had so many of your questions answered. You seem so much more positive now in your posts too.

Evesmama Tue 05-Apr-05 22:31:52

you sound so positive now, thats really good
good luck with everything[sile]

Blossomhill Tue 05-Apr-05 22:35:05

Ah thanks everyone. You are all so lovely

I feel like a weight has been lifted. As I said dd still has lots going on but I now know in my heart (what my head always told me!) exactly what's going on. Once you know that you can face it and I never had that feeling until last week.
I am going to stay on the Bibic programme forever (until they kick us off anyway lol).

beccaboo Tue 05-Apr-05 22:36:42

BH, you really do sound so much more positive since your visit - so much so that you've inspired me to re-investigate Bibic, it sounds like it was such a good experience. You give other people masses of support on here too, don't underestimate it . Good to hear the news about dd.

Davros Tue 05-Apr-05 22:39:37

emmamtg, don't worry about asking what BIBIC stands for, not need for bum or shit!
Bloss, I'm so glad you went. We all know how nervous you were about it and it really seems to have been a great thing for you all. And you are a support and source of info for others. Don't apologise at all or I will send you a laminated poem

ThomCat Tue 05-Apr-05 22:46:18

Wow bloss, I've somehow missed all of the bibic thing and what's been going on in oyur life. I feel the urge to meet up with you again coming on. Real life happy hug in order. Lots of love to you and yours - TC xxxxxxxxx

Christie Tue 05-Apr-05 23:23:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blossomhill Tue 05-Apr-05 23:29:29

Again you are all so kind

I am so sorry (really want a laminated poem please Davro)

TheReturnOfMrsF Tue 05-Apr-05 23:30:43

that is such a happy END to the 'is she/isn't she' story.!!!!

What a relief.

Thank god you held off trying the medicatioms for her supposed ADHD!!!! (the paed has hinted at ADHD/Meds for Leigh-and i am not comfy with that either)

Blossomhill Tue 05-Apr-05 23:31:19

Mrs F - go to Bibic, I think you would feel so at peace if you did!!!!

Blossomhill Tue 05-Apr-05 23:32:19

Thomcat - I'd love to see you again
Hug back to you xxxxx

TheReturnOfMrsF Tue 05-Apr-05 23:41:25

i am taking the boys to see this new psychologist on friday...handed in my 'supporting letter' for tagging alex along she will be aware of my concerns.

If that is a pointless afair then i will contact BIBIC...... I just feel we need something for the WHOLE family as DH and i are so distant from each other - and fromwhat J'sM said her DHwas better about the ASD stuff after BIBIC

Blossomhill Tue 05-Apr-05 23:50:06

Mrs F - Dh is a different person. He sees things so much clearer as it was usually me relaying things back but the therapist at Bibic made so much sense and I think it's helped the whole family

TheReturnOfMrsF Tue 05-Apr-05 23:50:53

there u r!!!

Jayzmummy Wed 06-Apr-05 00:03:48

I have said it before and I will say it again.....BIBIC made us as a "FAMILY" understand J's world.
Before going dh had his head in the sand and would just harp on at me for being an old worry he is the one on the phone to the therapist at BIBIC seeking advice over J's little dh is the one who sits for hours reading all he can on ASD....given he is dyslexic this is no easy task for hubby is the one who spends 30 mins a day doing J's sensory programme.....dh is the one who tottles off to the supermarket to read the labels and make sure J isnt eating the foods he shouldnt....dh is involved because he now understands why J behaves the way he does.....without our BIBIC experience this would not have happened and I would have been still going it alone.

Blossomhill Wed 06-Apr-05 00:18:33

Ah that is so lovely Jayzmummy Dh is being the same sort of. Although we have not got everything into place yet!!!!
The lovely thing for me was when I spoke to the therapist she sent dd her love!!!

sylvm Tue 12-Apr-05 13:58:21

pleased to hear BIBIC was so positive for you Blossomhill. We have been investigating this for a while and have our telephone initial interview on Friday. We want to learn to live with our daughter's difficulties and help her to achieve her potential. We hope it will help us enjoy her more than we have been which sounds an awful thing to say but hopefully people on here will know what I mean.

Merlot Tue 12-Apr-05 16:34:31

Our Bibic trip is planned for 27th-29th April - so I will report back. Cant wait to go! Sylvm - I found the telephone interview great - as if someone was really listening

sylvm Tue 12-Apr-05 21:14:56

Hope it goes well Merlot. I need to get my head round all the things we need to tell them on Friday. They say it will take about one and a half hours - that's a really long phone call!

jayzmummy Tue 12-Apr-05 21:21:13

sylvm.....dont worry about the phone interview....its just a long chat about your daughter.
I know when I had my first interview with them it felt like the first time I was actually talking to someone who understood what I was saying.....which was an immense relief considering the babboons we have working here in our area all think I am stark raving mad!!!!!!!

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