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Newbie to this forum.. What help can we get at nursery for our daughter?

11 replies

DJAngel · 02/10/2008 22:29

We have a meeting next week at the mainstream nursery where my dd is due to start in new year. It's to discuss what extra support she'll need and discuss any concerns. Having had two recent visits I've got loads.. Am wondering how I can prepare for this meeting. I'm worrying that we've chosen the wrong place and have now left it too late for somewhere else- ds went there and he was happy there but was much more self sufficient ( not SN )and is very confident and sociable. I fear dd will really struggle and not cope at all. I feel she'll need a 1-1 worker but was told today that just means they would have an extra member of staff on when she's there and they informally take it in turns to work with dd throughout the session. They said this was to discourage over attachment to just one worker and to give workers a break as '2 1/2 hours with a special needs child is very exhausting for them so they spread the load. ' ( tell me about it!!) Is this a normal arrangement? Feel very anxious about it all.
Since dd dx in March with Tuberous Sclerosis ( multiple features but most significant for us currently is significant global developmental delay and epilepsy ) we've been quite protected by not having to deal with all the educational stuff stress. Here we are at the first of many many meetings I'm sure. Just hoping I'm up to it.. any thoughts ideas very welcome!!

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moondog · 02/10/2008 22:32

How old?
I'd be after a statement of SN myself which is a legal document not just vague guff (as is usually the case) Your local Special Needs Advisory project (all Education authorities have 1-ask for details) will help with this.
Welcome btw

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TotalChaos · 02/10/2008 22:32

DS never had 1-1 at nursery, so not speaking from personal experience, but it sounds like the mainstream nursery doesn't have a good attitude towards your DD's needs. 1-1 is usually the same person all the time, and if they feel 2.5 hours is so exhausting for them I don't think it bodes well.

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moondog · 02/10/2008 22:34

I agree that 1:1 not always best solution.
Is often the worst actually (see a lot of it in my job as a salt)

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Hangingbellyofbabylon · 02/10/2008 22:56

My dd has mild cerebral palsy and has just started at a nursery. Like you they told me that it would be extra staff generally rather than a named person. I complained and said that dd needs someone to rely on and who will look out for her and her needs in particular. They did end up letting her have the same lovely lady each session and she is now starting to settle in much better. I don't think that getting attached to someone when they are so little is a problem anyway. Children, particularly those with SN need to be able to trust and rely on someone. Have you had the CAF assessment? if not it's worth getting hold of the Early years team at your local council and start hassling! we're just at the start of this process and I don't know lots about it but one thing I have learnt is that they will only ever offer the absolute minimum and if you want anything else you have to fight. Good luck and welcome to the board!

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Romy7 · 02/10/2008 23:13

dd2 had a dedicated 1-1 for two years (although 3 of them in that time lol), but when we moved i asked specifically for the new nursery to provide 1-1 support but with different members of staff for exactly the reasons your nursery describes. i think initially a dedicated 1-1 is fantastic - it helps the child settle etc etc, but in the run-up to school (we did it for the 2 pre-school years) i was keen for her to experience lots of different help. i became concerned that she was going to nursery to play with mrs x and was not learning how to form peer group relationships. a good 1-1 will of course facilitate, but it is very easy for a child to become reliant on the one helper, and if the staff member leaves or is off sick it becomes very difficult to explain to some sn kids. you will know your dd best, though. different things and increasing independence became more important for my dd2.
we were only statemented for school btw. the nursery support was all at SA+, but areas vary. she has two different LSAs working with her now in yr r, and a whole variety of playground supervision and lunch cover lol. (all in the statement and trained )

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FanjolinaJolly · 02/10/2008 23:42

Hi there,are you in England.Does your dd get access to Portage at all if she had GDD.My dd is coming up 3 and her Portage worker has been immensely helpful in acessing services for her education.They referred to educational psychologist and we are currently awaiting Pre school learning alliance support to provide a worker.

www.Portage.org.uk

IIRC you can also self refer.

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FanjolinaJolly · 02/10/2008 23:47

ps if you click on the link then go to "about portage" then click on the uk map for your region it will then scroll down a list of Portage services in your geographical area,plus their phone number.

Hope it is of some help.

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Arabica · 03/10/2008 00:09

Would also suggest getting a statement. My DD has GDD and has a 1:1 worker at the nursery she attends (she only goes 2 mornings a week and at her age, 2, and developmental level I think being with the same worker is best).
We are in the process of obtaining a statement (have just sent back draft to be corrected) but in the meantime, all the services working with DD (OT, physio, SALT, portage) have been to visit the nursery and regularly advise them about how best to meet her needs.
If you'd like a statement, just contact the local authority direct. No need to wait for the nursery to initiate the process.
Good luck and welcome to mumsnet special needs forum!

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DJAngel · 05/10/2008 22:45

Thanks for the welcome everyone and useful advice. Yes we're in England and after a very long wait have recently been allocated a portage worker who has been three times and is lovely. Not sure how involved she'll be with other stuff but so far dd seems to be enjoying the sessions and have got lots of support and advice from the worker. Still feel for our dd we would want the same one or maybe two workers with dd especially to help settle her in at first. If they think it's too much for one worker they need to be dealing with that in more creative ways than just not doing it. i.e. supporting/supervising staff properly. All comments gave me loads to think about. Still feel a bit nauseous every time I think about tuesdays meeting but I guess it will good to get all our concerns out there in the open. Looking forward to being part of the SN board.. Have a good week everyone..

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DJAngel · 05/10/2008 22:45

Thanks for the welcome everyone and useful advice. Yes we're in England and after a very long wait have recently been allocated a portage worker who has been three times and is lovely. Not sure how involved she'll be with other stuff but so far dd seems to be enjoying the sessions and have got lots of support and advice from the worker. Still feel for our dd we would want the same one or maybe two workers with dd especially to help settle her in at first. If they think it's too much for one worker they need to be dealing with that in more creative ways than just not doing it. i.e. supporting/supervising staff properly. All comments gave me loads to think about. Still feel a bit nauseous every time I think about tuesdays meeting but I guess it will good to get all our concerns out there in the open. Looking forward to being part of the SN board.. Have a good week everyone..

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DJAngel · 05/10/2008 22:47

OOps! Sorry about that! Always start repeating myself at this time of night!

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