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Right, dd1 has decided not to eat - strategies?

(8 Posts)
silverfrog Fri 19-Sep-08 13:40:29

Well, that's not strictly true - she will eat cakes/biscuits/fruit bars etc.

But, she has not had a decent meal for over a week now.

she has just gone off eating proper meals - she used to do ok, but now will only take one or two bites.

She is hungry, but will only eat snacks.

So, what should i do?

She cannot live on blueberries and fruit bars/biscuits.

She won't eat bread/potatoes (never has), and now won't eat pasta/rice based stuff. The ony "separate" food she used to eat was fishfingers (everythign else sauce based with pasta/rice) but won't eat those anymore.

She will eat: raisins, rice cakes (plain and with nothing on) crackers (ditto), fruit bars, coconut bar thing, blueberries and grapes. oh, and breakfast cereal (corn puffs). that's it, other than cakes/biscuits. She drinks fruit juice - will not have water.

I am tryign very hard to not make this an issue (first real food issues we've had, other than likes/dislikes), but I can't let her just have enough biscuits to fill her up, surely? But then again, I don't want her to go hungry either.

bubblagirl Fri 19-Sep-08 14:33:03

well fody people have now said to let them eat what they want as long as they are eating

my friend had to put very small portion of food out and encourage her ds to eat that even if one bite lots of praise and then biscuits could be given and no more forcing

next day 2 bites then could have biscuits lots of praise etc and so on then if you can eat that you can have but took good few weeks no pressure and a lot of patience

but food on table to eat all of was only about 1 tablespoon as not to create anxiety gradually bit more until he was asking for certain food

not sure how old your dd is but its one tbs per portion so 3 tablespoons mash, meat and veg for each yr of there age so for ds 3 tbs of each portion and that is sufficiant size meal so 9 tbs is his dinner portion

hope it helps my friends ds can still be picky but is eating so much better than before

vicsta Fri 19-Sep-08 16:47:25

Sounds like good advice from bubbla. Can't top it but bumping in case someone else can!

silverfrog Sun 21-Sep-08 19:15:21

Thanks

She is still not eating (10 days and counting)

She will have one or two spoonfuls (have tried every main meal she used to like now, so it's not just one thing she's gone odd sad) and then she moves on.

I have no problem with allowing her fruit and biscuits, but the problem is they do not fill her up, and she is still hungry.

today she has had:

breakfast as usual 9only meal she still eats)

lunch - two spoonfuls (she uses a teaspoon, so not very much at all) of rice with veg curry sauce; some blueberries; a biscuit;some raisins; a couple of rice cakes; a fruit bar.

snack (mid afternoon - she was starving) some raisins and a bag of organix crisps (first time she's eaten them - must have been hungry!)

tea: one teaspoonful of pasta bolognaise; some blueberies, a biscuit, some raisins, a couple of rice cakes, a couple of crackers. Then we didn't have anything else she would eat so she went hungry. and had a tantrum about it.

What on earth can I give her that will fillher up?

If she was being extremely fussy/picky but was not starving hungry this would be easier, i think. But she spends a large part of every day hungry, and I find it so hard.

ChirpyGirl Sun 21-Sep-08 19:41:23

DD1 has days like this. She has a massive breakfast, big bowl of cereal, 2 pieces of toast, banana and juice this means I don't feel so bad if she doesn't eat much later.
She has morning snack and afternoon snack and normally we have lunch out like sandwiches or breadsticks with cheese. If we are in she has it on a picnic rug on the floor which makes it go down a bit more as we feed all teh teddies too.

At tea time what has worked is the 'take one bite' thing, then she can have a yoghurt, but if she is still hungry I offer her more tea, or more yoghurt, nothing else, so she knows to eat it.
We also got over the latest refusal by going out and buying her her own cutlery (bloody night garden) and plates which helped.

bubblagirl Mon 22-Sep-08 08:34:08

have you tried making own pizza's etc getting hert o help giving some food different names making faces with food just throwing ideas out here lol

at the end of the day she will eat if that hungry so maybe leaving her alone at meal time with that meal and seeing if on her own she will pick more

ask her what food she likes and make together give two options you will have to eat one do you want this or this and stick to it and if trying it praise loads maybe it gets to a point they know how far to push you as you would never see them go hungry so give enough fuss we'll give in

so maybe saying its this or this and then if you try it you can have xx and being slightly firmer ignoring tantrums and calmly saying i already told you this and then this and ignoring again

MUM23ASD Mon 22-Sep-08 10:59:28

i'd suggest ceral for breakfast lunch and tea...if she likes it and eats it...then at least you know shes getting the vitamins and minerals and fibre...if she has milk with it - even better.

then hooray to her liking fruit.... if there is some she really likes...after having cereal you may find allowing her as much as she can eat WILL fill her up

if she's old enough try asking her to 'score' foods...10 being yummy...0 being yuck...and then ask her what score different foods have...hopefully a few of the things YOU think she HATES she may score higher than YOU expect... and depending on her understanding....you can 'negotiate' using this knowledge... eg in our house fishfingers may score 7, fishcakes 5 and stew 0.... so though i know he prefers fishfingers... i offer stew or fishcakes... and he chooses fishcakes. result.

if too young for that- try sitting down with a few magazines and helping her 'cut and stick' pictures of 'yummy' 'yucky' foods....

key issue often in our house is the aniety and dread YOU will feel as mealtimes approach.

my boys are 9,11 & 14 and i am seriosly thinking of feeding each one a different meal, at different times...rather than carry on with the riots!!!

another tactic is to get a plate with lots os sections...and put crackers in one...fruit in another....ham or something proteiny...something a bit cheesy...even if its some kind of dip....or even a blob of butter for her to dip into???

she may have issues with food textures...mine hate putting something firm and something liquid in mouth at once...so yogurts with lumps are no go- but fromage frais are ok.

you could offer her 3 pots of fromage frais...lids off...pink , white and cream colour...and 3 biscuits...and rather than use a spoon...get her to use the biscuits...and as long as she has tried...take the yogurts away when she is 'finished' the ploy being if you give her 3...she may eat a 1/3 from each...ie a whole pot if added togethr...where as if you give her 1 pot...she may only eat 1 spoonful

if she has got sensory issues...i have more top advise....books to recommend... as i beilve there is a huge difference between FUSSY and SENSORY issues...but as i'm not sure what angle you are coming from...i'll wait and see how you reply!!!

MUM23ASD Mon 22-Sep-08 11:01:49

BTW- my ds2 weaned beautifully...ate everthing untill lumps appeared...so was told to not mash- but leave food on plate for finger feeding....some sucess...but despite being my best 'weaner' he at 11 remains my worst 'eater'

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