Hi guys i am new here, i have been told to post this in SN section. I feel if i don't air i am going to burst with tears. I am lost and i don't know what to do.
I broke up with my childrens father, a year ago and it seems to have taken an effect on my eldest who is 4, Joshua. His father was a bully, who got very aggressive at times. He smashed things, slammed doors, bruised joshua, used to let his older boys "ban" josh from certain rooms when they were over I tried to stop them, i aired my views and always made sure my baby was loved but he wanted to play with the boys, he didnt understand why he wasn't allowed i did find it hard to stand up to my then partner, as he was a bully to me too. Over the years my son has expressed the unwillingness to share with his sister, pushing her away etc and he does with other children too. I have tried to curb this, he has had toys taken away, had the naughty step, mat, room etc to no avail. My son has now taken to saying no and screaming at me, and when i tel him to apologise he laughs at me, i can't seem to discipline him and he doesn't listen to me. He won't let his sister play with any of her own toys, he gets so angry if she distrups a specific order his toys are in. He wont let her in their room alone as he hides his toys in there, it seems.
The other thing with my son is the way he tries to hurt people and animals. I obviously THINK i have curbed the animal one but i am struggling with the people one. He spits in my cousins bf's face, and gets so hyper active he wont listen to me controlling him! It isn't down to food colouring or too many sweets, i have monitored this.
I have been told today that josh pushed a little girl over and she got very upset, and he pushed two others over too. He has done it everyday this week and did it when he was at nursery too. My friends little boy is in his class, and says nobody really plays with josh, as he pushes them. A little girl called holly upsets josh by saying she doesnt like him and apparantly punches him in the head, though a teacher has not told me such things? i am assuming they would???
I dont know what to do. I tried talking to Health visitor and she just says its normal behaviour, and sent a person over to see him and for the measely hour they were here, he was as good as gold.
I am at a loss. I am thinking the doctor might be able to help me.
The other thing with josh is the rages he gets into. He gets so angry he shakes and goes red and throws things and smashes things I think the way his father was has effected him and i dont know what to do to help my little boy. i am litrely in tears because i feel like such a bad mum. I have made an appointment for next thursday at 2:20pm which means he will have to come out of school early for it as it's importan. I hope they understand.
Joshua's half brother was diagnosed with aspergers syndrome two years ago.
Added onto this is his sensitive hearing, he screams when buses and lorries and trains come by if they are too close to him, and he covers his ears.
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.
SN children
Behavioural issues with 4 yr old LONG but PLEASE help :(
Ree24 · 04/09/2008 22:33
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