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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on SN.

RARGH!!! Bloody community paed!!

(29 Posts)
Flamesparrow Wed 03-Sep-08 16:16:58

How many times in how many ways does he want to tell me Flamechick isn't autistic??

By autistic he means classic autism.

Apparently (according to the wisdom of comm paed) AS is a language thing, purely language and cannot be even thought about until they are at least 7 years old.

Twice now I have sat there wasting mine and his time.

I know she isn't autistic. I think she has many AS traits. Not desperately severe, but enough to make her little life awkward in future so I wanted to get support in place now before she becomes "the child with attitude problems".

I still haven't called NAS blush I just feel like I am wasting their time - it doesn't impact her life greatly if we manage it right, the dr seems to think I am being pfb. maybe he is right.


Flamesparrow Wed 03-Sep-08 16:17:38

With the maybe he is right - he could be, but I would never trust his diagnosis seeing as he seems to know sod all about AS

MannyMoeAndJack Wed 03-Sep-08 16:27:57

Could you afford a private diagnosis? I'm sure there are folks on here who would be able to recommend somebody in your area?

misscutandstick Wed 03-Sep-08 16:34:29

I know EXACTLY where you are coming from!!! angry i have literally lost count of the times that DS5's Paed has tried to convince me he isnt autistic - as hes seen DS5 since he was 3mths (with 'growth delay' or whatever the new-fangled term is for failure to thrive). and hes seen him every 3mths (hes 2.3 now, -my DS, NOT the doc! grin )... anyhoo too the point

I KNOW WHAT AUTISM LOOKS LIKE... even the SALT (with a bit of cajoling) said his symptoms were those 'consistant with' someone who may have (careful dont commit yersel doc!) some kind of PDD, possibly. But couldnt be pushed for any other possibility.

WHY OH WHY dont the docs call a spade a spade? if it looks like a horse and sounds like a horse... surely one could assume that it is most likely a horse (or a zebra in disguise grin ).

My Paed too, as yours, seems to know very little in the way of 'head' doctoring... tho im sure hes perfectly good at the physical stuff - but headology has come such a long way, even in the last 10yrs, let alone the last 25 (when i think our Paed was trained)... perhaps a course or 2, to catch-up would be helpful? but i fear i may be blacklisted for suggesting that grin


Flamesparrow Wed 03-Sep-08 16:35:11

I'm getting to the stage of heading down that route, but then go back to the whole pfb/my parenting thing

castlesintheair Wed 03-Sep-08 16:41:19

We saw someone privately because we were experiencing the same problems as you Flamesparrow. She didn't even mention autism - whether DS has it or not. (We too were told by community paed - 'DS doesn't have autism come back in 6 months and we'll see how he's getting on'. Gah.) The private developmental paed just focused on 'problems' and we got help for them individually.

Tclanger Wed 03-Sep-08 16:45:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Flamesparrow Wed 03-Sep-08 17:14:40


Argh for you MC&S

trace2 Wed 03-Sep-08 17:20:56

so sorry this is happing, we are waiting to see pead for ds i am scared they dont know what they doing to or waiting to long to see some one else! i to have considered paying to see some one hes 6

bullet123 Wed 03-Sep-08 17:53:12

"AS is a language thing, purely language"
Bollocks, bollocks and, erm, bollocks hmm.

Flamesparrow Wed 03-Sep-08 17:58:17

Yup. It took great restraint not to say exactly that. I feel like I want to take someone with me who is confident. I want to curl up in a ball when I get in there

twocutedarlings Wed 03-Sep-08 19:41:40

Hi Flame,

You need a referal to a development pead or a Neuro pead.

Have a look at this from the NAS site and find out in your area who can assess ASDs, seek a referal and ask specifically for an assessment for ASD, the legnth of the wait will vary from area to area, thankfully we got lucky and only waited about 4 mths for our first appointment.


Comm peads are shite!! when it comes to anything like this, we wasted 12 mths pissing around with the comm pead.

Totally agree with bullet what this pead has said is a load of bollock.

My DD (6 tomorrow LOL) was dxd at 4!! she dosent have any lanuguage problems as such (ie there is not speach delay) but does have big promblems in her understanding and processing.

Where abouts are you Flame??

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 19:51:32

oooh that link is great!!!

I'm in Bournemouth

I look at her, and I know there are so much "worse" out there, but then I look at my sister (who DD is a miniature version of), and I see the issues she has had in life with people thinking she just had an attitude etc. I know how I used to see DSis before we realised that there could well be a reason for her being like this (it was only a few years ago).

AttilaTheMeerkat Wed 03-Sep-08 19:52:37

Would second the suggestion made by twocutedarlings to see a developmental paed rather than just a community one (think what was stated by this person is a load of old bullocks).

Do call the NAS as well. You will not be wasting their time; why would you think this?.

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 19:56:18

Really just the whole "am I imagining it" thing

twocutedarlings Wed 03-Sep-08 20:05:16

I was going to offer to come with you grin but im up north.

Infact in knew that anyway..DOH!! you met with my dear friend EB over the summer, or sockmonster as she now call herself LOL.

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 20:05:44

grin she's looooooooooooovely

twocutedarlings Wed 03-Sep-08 20:07:45

The thing is with AS it is often a case of now you see it now you dont!! At home and around non busy/hectic familiar surroundings my DD is almost NT.

For mths after her DX i was convinced that they had got it wrong!!

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 20:09:18

DD is the other way round - stick her in school with all that routine and uniforms and stuff and she is fiiiiiiiiiine. Take her out to the randomness at home, and it all kicks off.

I feel like I want that bloke to come live with use for a week, then tell me she is fine and just a bit shy

twocutedarlings Wed 03-Sep-08 20:09:58

I know!! <<whispers>> i dont know what i would do without her!! she is one of the few people that totally gets my DD, even better than i do some days LOL! grin.

Tclanger Wed 03-Sep-08 20:10:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 20:12:39

NappiesGalore/BloodySmartarse is like that with DD. She has had this magical touch with her from the first time they met.

Normally a new person, DD clings to me and whimpers for the first 5-10 mins minimum - it never happened with NG - she was just in there and loved her. It was only the final day on holiday together that she got a glimpse of the hard version of her. It is like she has this amazing calming influence.

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 20:13:21

Ooooooh of course blush GOS makes sense now!

twocutedarlings Wed 03-Sep-08 20:15:39

tis very common that children with AS do this!!

My DD has lots of sensory issues (noise, smell, light) so often spends alot of time under tables ect sad, but she is slowly getting better and is copeing really well as school at the moment.

Social situations are the hardest thing for her, but again this is improving at one point she couldnt even tolerate another child stood next to her. However she will now play with children she knows really well, and will play side by side with other children.

UglyNakedGuy Wed 03-Sep-08 23:29:16

I'm all teary I have a plan now, and my mum says she is happy to come to anything with me - she hasn't offered before as she didn't want to be interfering mother.

I am just back into the feeling of maybe I am making it all up.

DH is in his own little world, he sees no problem with her, but he has no experience with any children other than ours.

I wanna cry. I wanna sleep. I can't do either. I fancy whiskey but have already have wine and it gets to that point of when does it turn from a drink to relax to drowning sorrows!

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