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Who will look after my baby....

(56 Posts)
PipinJo Fri 22-Aug-08 18:46:27

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moondog Fri 22-Aug-08 19:12:56

You have been brave and wise though. i have personally seen stress and chaos that ensues when parents haven't got this sorted.
<big shoulder squeeze> smile

Tclanger Fri 22-Aug-08 19:32:12

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Seuss Fri 22-Aug-08 20:01:48

Well done tackling this PipinJo, I keep having half-hearted discussions with DH and mum about this but it's hard to sound possible guardians out about this, really need to though...Everytime DH and I are in a car alone (not that often) I think 'what if something happened now?'

sphil Fri 22-Aug-08 20:28:28

Oh God - this is something that we're really struggling with atm. Like you Pipinjo, my parents are the only suitable guardians for the boys, but they're both in their 70s and though fit and healthy atm, I really don't think they could realistically look after two boys full time. We've tentatively sounded out my sister (who'd be brilliant) but she has started a relationship with a man who is completely inexperienced with and uninterested in children, so we don't feel we can ask her now.

It frightens the life out of me - there aren't many people around who are prepared to take on a probably life-long caring role.

PipinJo Fri 22-Aug-08 21:05:27

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Seuss Fri 22-Aug-08 21:35:16

sadSounds really tough PipinJo, any chance your sister or brother would have a change of heart?

I'm in a similar situation to sphil, my parents could cope at the moment but long term not so sure as ds1 is going to get bigger and there are two younger ones. I can imagine my brother and partner with the younger ones but not sure they'd cope with ds1 (and then there's whether they want to anyway...)

sarah293 Fri 22-Aug-08 21:35:59

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Seuss Fri 22-Aug-08 22:00:12


Tclanger Fri 22-Aug-08 22:26:03

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PipinJo Fri 22-Aug-08 22:27:27

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Tclanger Fri 22-Aug-08 22:37:35

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SammyK Fri 22-Aug-08 23:00:09

sad Sorry to hear about your dx pippinjo.

I agree with TC about respite, if you don't have anything regular already set up I would look into it as making yourself run down with stress and tiredness isn't good for either of you. {hug} Not very mnetty I know but now and again I give em out! blush

PipinJo Fri 22-Aug-08 23:00:18

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Tclanger Fri 22-Aug-08 23:00:50

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MannyMoeAndJack Fri 22-Aug-08 23:09:44

A sensible step to take, if a difficult one too. It is a tricky one though isn't it? We have no relatives who would be able to look after our ds, he is just too much of a handful and has too many physical needs - he needs energetic, fit, healthy and active people around him and apart from myself and my dh, there is nobody else. Our wills are currently out of date - have been for ages, just don't seem to get around to doing it - but we've more or less already agreed that if we snuff it before ds turns 18yrs, then ds will have to go into State care. Not really sure what this would entail but I'm guessing it would involve a residential school because SS were unable to find a foster carer willing to look after him for even monthly respite care.

Good luck with your tests, hope you and your ds get a good outcome.

deeeja Sat 23-Aug-08 01:59:37

Pippinjo, you are so brave! I can not imagine having to deal with all that you have to cope with. I hope you get some answers for your illness, and that your ds is given the all clear.
I hope that all your plans for care work out too. I have no idea what to do for my boys, it is too scary, I am a complete wuss!
Sorry to hear about your situation too Riven.

PipinJo Sat 23-Aug-08 21:48:29

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Seuss Sat 23-Aug-08 22:04:05

I hope you get your tests soon it must be horrendous to have to wait on top of everything else. I hadn't even thought about guardianship after 18, I've no idea how ds1 will be at 18 (8 at the mo), you've certainly given me some things to think about. I hope you can get some comfort from knowing you are dealing with the practicalities at least. Take care.x.

PipinJo Sat 23-Aug-08 22:18:27

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sphil Sun 24-Aug-08 08:01:23

pipin sad I had no idea you were going through this. so sorry.

TinySocks Sun 24-Aug-08 08:20:00

PipinJo, don't know what to say. You sound really strong, on the ball, and prepared.
It is good that they detected your problem and you can make provisions. My thoughts are with you.

LeonieD Sun 24-Aug-08 10:07:09

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Raine3 Sun 24-Aug-08 22:13:30

My sister keeps nagging at me to make sure she gets DS if anything happens to me ... which is very nice to know ... family are not 'always' a pain in the bum ! wink

Seuss Sun 24-Aug-08 22:30:02

Ah, that's cool Raine! I think my brother would but I can't see him coping, although I guess it's one of those things where you don't know what you can handle until you're doing it.

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