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Could I ask those of you with autistic children

(31 Posts)
Flightlite Thu 21-Aug-08 19:58:52

whether this list makes any sense to you?

It was on some parenting website, I was googling for signs and this was listed under what your baby should be doing by 12 months:

By 12 Months
She doesn't crawl.

She doesn't say single words.

She doesn't use gestures such as waving or shaking her head.

She doesn't point to objects or pictures.

She can't stand when supported.

Ds did just about crawl.
He still has no words whatsoever - he's almost 15mo. He babbles but nothing makes any sense. Even 'Mama' isn't reliable.

He rarely waves, seems to be an accident when he does. Doesn't shake his head or nod.

He doesn't point to things.

He can stand now - is starting to take first few steps.

Should I be worried? He has also started to flap his hands quite a lot but this tends to be when he doesn't want to do something, not generally in excitement iyswim.

Thanks for any thoughts.

SpookyMadMummy Thu 21-Aug-08 20:12:56

These appear to be developmental milestones rather than Autism markers.
Can autism be diagnosed at such a young age? My DD has ASD and was not showing major signs till she was 2 1/2. She met all her developmental milestones.
If you are concerned (and obv. you are) then goto your GP and ask for your Ds to be referred to a paediatrician straight away.
If he is not meeting his milestones it does not necessarily mean some kind of Autism.

Flightlite Thu 21-Aug-08 20:14:41

Sorry if I have got it wrong. It says that if the child isn't doing these things you should be concerned - I guess I should know better than listen to a didgy parenting site with pop ups all over it smile

Thanks for your advice.

deeeja Thu 21-Aug-08 20:19:36

It is good that your ds is babbling. If your are concerned then you should speak to your GP. Does he respond to his name, and appear interested in things you are doing?
I think 15 months is still a little young for words, some children do start talking alot later and are fine. Does he 'play' with toys. Is he interested in his surroundings, and sharing that with you in some way?
I would not be too concerned about everything you point out, but would be watching for other problems with communication such as those I have listed.

SpookyMadMummy Thu 21-Aug-08 20:20:17

Oh no no! Not wrong!
As parents we all have concerns about development. I don;t know if you are seeing a h/v but I think she should have picked up that your DS is not hitting his milestones.
Things manifest differently in different children. We can never be sure, just cover the bases smile
Was your son early or ill at birth? and have you had his hearing checked? Strikes me with the non verbal communication and apathy it may be worth asking for his hearing to be tested.

FioFio Thu 21-Aug-08 20:22:11

Message withdrawn

Flightlite Thu 21-Aug-08 20:26:30

No Fio, not the Other Side <duh duh daaaahhh>

No it was or some such nonsense.

I didn;t know where to look. Mid you have just looked at some other sites and they have a similar list.

No HV at the moment, I got hacked off with them, so he missed his 8 month check - I think he had a hearing test at birth and that was fine. He does respond to his name now.

I guess maybe I need to get him seen by the HV and see what she says. He's interested in things but doesn't point, or wave, or nod etc.

He just makes little noises.
Also I think I posted before about the way he kind of stops, goes very quiet, and lies flat on the floor or something - it's really odd!

Strange baby! smile

Flightlite Thu 21-Aug-08 20:29:02

He wasn't early or ill either. Maybe he is just a bit slow at some stuff. It;s the fact he has a few things not happening off the list that got me thinking.

That and the hand flapping thing.

I wouldn't particularly mind if he was autistic, I am just interested because I want to know everything about him!

SpookyMadMummy Thu 21-Aug-08 20:39:04

grin gotta love parenthood!!!

They are all so different though! I have 2 Dd's one with ASD and the other NT and the differences in them are astonishing! The younger one is NT and she is overtaking her sister who is 2 1/2 years older than her!!

SpookyMadMummy Thu 21-Aug-08 20:39:06

grin gotta love parenthood!!!

They are all so different though! I have 2 Dd's one with ASD and the other NT and the differences in them are astonishing! The younger one is NT and she is overtaking her sister who is 2 1/2 years older than her!!

SpookyMadMummy Thu 21-Aug-08 20:39:44

blush dunno what happened there! I don;t usually double post!!

sarah293 Thu 21-Aug-08 20:42:25

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Flightlite Thu 21-Aug-08 20:46:32

Thankyou - it's all a bit hit and miss really till they are older isn't it? I think maybe I just need to wait and see.

He's so different to his brother already, who is as far as I know NT...

Thanks again for all your suggestions.

ouryve Thu 21-Aug-08 21:49:39

I have 2 boys, one with autism and one with suspected autism and both were so different at that age. Breaking up the categories of the milestones you mention, there could be lots of reasons for the delay in gross motor skills you mentioned which would be worth talking to your health visitor about anyhow. Slow development of motor skills isn't a differential for autism, but can be secondary, related to underlying motivational factors. Even at 15 months, it's still early days as far as language is concerned and the same non-autism related thing that could possibly be behind the slow development of motor skills can also impede speech production and gesturing.

What I'm trying to say is (but beginning to waffle, since DS2 had a bad night last night and my brain is foggy), that there could be lots of reasons for what you are worried about. Since you are worried, you should speak to a professional, anyhow.

And just to add, that give it a few months and you can apply the CHAT yourself, if you've had no response or are still waiting for someone to talk to you. This is the checklist for signs of autism in toddlers. It's pretty easy to google and find explanations. It tends to be administered routinely around 18 months in some areas, anyhow.

From what others have said about age, despite having a lot of autism in the family, DS1 was getting on for 3 before we put 2 and 2 together and admitted that it didn't add up to him being neurotypical. DS2 was a much easier baby, but by 15-16 months we were beginning to worry, given that we now had a firm history in our own immediate family and we got a referral from our own HV by 20 months. Some things can't be diagnosed firmly until a little older, but help can still be given with immediate obvious problems.

TotalChaos Thu 21-Aug-08 21:49:39

you'ld expect pointing by 18 months and first words by 2.

bullet123 Thu 21-Aug-08 21:51:05

Pointing and waving can often come a little later in even typical babies. It's very difficult to tell the signs of ASD at 12 or 15 months months. Some possible signs might include:
Not looking at a familiar person for reassurance or strange things occurring (eg visit to strange person, sudden noise).
Not checking or seeming to want a familiar person's reaction to something the baby is interested in. Eg baby won't show things, won't look at, say, parent for shared reaction to thing baby finds interesting.
Baby doesn't seem to differentiate between strangers and familiar people. Ironically some children on the spectrum can be very clingy to one particular person, but at 12 months old this level of attachment is typical of a baby.
Baby doesn't let others know his needs in non verbal ways. Eg won't cry if needs changing or is thirsty, won't point or pass things they want.
Baby doesn't engage, or has difficulty engaging, in imitative behaviours. Eg won't stick out tongue when you stick out tongue, won't clap when you clap or won't babble at you in response to you talking.
Things like handflapping and not speaking yet would not, at this stage, make me think he was on the autistic spectrum.

Hecate Thu 21-Aug-08 21:58:40




coppertop Thu 21-Aug-08 22:10:07

I have 3 children (2 with ASD and 1 without) and they were all very different at that age.

IME the crawling/walking skills didn't seem to follow any particular pattern. Ds1 (ASD) was the first to be mobile but the last to walk (16mths). Ds2 (ASD) crawled a little later than his brother but was the 1st to walk (12mths). Dd (NT) never crawled at all and started walking at 14mths.

15mths is still a little early to be worrying about language and pointing. Babbling is a good sign though. It's something that my ds1 never did.

I can't remember exactly but I don't think ds2 did much flapping. Ds1 did and still does but it's usually when he's either overwhelmed or frustrated.

It's worth keeping an eye on if you're concerned but at this age there's nothing in your OP that has any alarm bells ringing for me.

luckylady74 Thu 21-Aug-08 22:15:05

My ds1 has an aspergers dx and the only thing he didn't do on that list was point - even now at 6yrs old his point is clumsy.

sphil Thu 21-Aug-08 22:20:35

Your description is almost exactly how DS1 (now 7) was at that age. He crawled at just over 12 months, walked at 17 and was a late talker. He couldn't weight bear on his legs for ages. He has some dyspraxic traits and at times I think some Asperger-ish traits too but is doing well at school, has friends, is happy and healthy. I well remember being worried about him being late to hit milestones though - those checklists were a nightmare!

daisy5678 Thu 21-Aug-08 22:24:52

J was a little late crawling and walking, but hit the talking milestones and did wave (though no pointing) and was very very sociable. Loved playing peekaboo etc.

But still dx autistic now. His...erm...uniqueness was not really noticeable until he started to crawl. Even then, I was able to be in denial about it until age 3, so no, no obvious signs. That list wouldn't have rung any alarm bells.

Flightlite Fri 22-Aug-08 07:34:50

Thankyou all very much...Hecate I've had a look and he only fails so far on the pointing, and the 'Oh look there's ...' bits.

So he might be Ok with these in another 4 months.
Thankyou for sharing your experiences, I am grateful.

I'll post back when he is a little older and let you know how he gets on.

Hecate Fri 22-Aug-08 07:41:31

It's so hard, isn't it.

Both of mine have autism.

ds1 I knew from birth that something was wrong, I just didn't know what. I used to sob that he didn't love me and he knew I was a bad mum because he didn't even look at me, etc.

ds2 was a bolt from the blue because he was so cuddly and interactive and then he lost all that.

Flightlite Fri 22-Aug-08 08:43:37

That's so sad Hecate. I cannot imagine losing the affection I get from Ds2. sad

I know another mother whose son didn;t look at her, she knew something was wrong and used to ask me - I told her he was obviously securely attached, as he used to run off and just keep going blush

He is 6 now, autistic, a lovely boy.

LeonieD Fri 22-Aug-08 09:02:15

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