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Does anyone else's dc talk to him/herself a lot...?

(35 Posts)
siblingrivalry Thu 21-Aug-08 19:53:17

Sorry for the numerous questions I keep askingblush. I just don't have a clue what is going on with dd at the moment.

DD1 is going through an ASD dx. She is always talking to herself (usually while running back and forth or in circles). This morning, I thought she was having a row with dd2 in the playroom but when I went in to look, dd1 was there alone.

Then,this afternoon, we were at the checkout in Asda and she was having a very animated conversation with herself while flicking her fingers and pacing a bit.
Both dh and I were a bit thrown by this, because she doesn't usually do this in public (at least not to that degree)and she was loud.

I'm not bothered by people staring -dd2 has provided many floor shows with her spectacular tantrums grin. I would just love to know if this is something common to ASD?
We have over a month until her next appointment and I am feeling a bit desperate.

Thanks in advance. So many of you have taken the trouble to give me advice and encouragement.

deeeja Thu 21-Aug-08 20:04:32

HI, yes my three year old autistic son does this constantly. He talks mainly gibberish but it is definately all to himself. If I try to join in, he ignores me and carries on. My 5 year old with aspergers/adhd also does this. HE has entire rows and fights and it cam seem quite alarming. I think he is working through things he can't cope with, and does it more in a stressful situation.
It may be a way of making sense of the world, I think.

thornrose Thu 21-Aug-08 20:07:04

Well, my 8yo dd has AS and she talks to herslelf a lot, but I'm not sure if it's typical of ASD to be honest.
I've realised that my dd actually acts out long dialogues, which often include little excerpts of things I've said or people on tv have said. It's almost like she is having the conversation she would like to be able to have if that makes sense?

thornrose Thu 21-Aug-08 20:07:35

deeja, snap!

siblingrivalry Thu 21-Aug-08 20:42:04

Thanks,both of you. It a relief that other parents can identify with this.

It seems to be worse when she is anxious or worried, so I agree that it could be a way of her making sense of the world.
Thornrose, she also copies things she has seen on TV/in a film, just like your dd.

My only concern is what the other kids might say to her if she does it at school sad

thornrose Thu 21-Aug-08 20:49:15

I work as a TA at my dd's school so I see her in the playground (which can be a double edged sword!)I see her wandering in little circles muttering away and it's not that noticable or unusual in the under 8's smile
You'd be surprised how many children play imaginary games on their own, it's quite hilarious!
Also, children are surprisingly tolerant of "odd" behaviours, at primary age at least. This has been my experience anyway!

siblingrivalry Thu 21-Aug-08 21:00:34

Thanks TR, that's reassuring.
I have also seen my dd doing exactly the same in the playground when I pick up dd2 from the pre-school. She 'mutters away' too smile.I would love to listen in sometimes, but I am definitely not welcome. It could be quite a revelation!
Was actually quite funny when she was doing it in Woolies last week -a handful of people 'pretending' not to stare or comment grin

thornrose Thu 21-Aug-08 21:07:01

I have to stop my dd sometimes when she's in her room having what sounds like a huge row, it makes me feel there's a real argument going on!
Most mornings on the way to school my dd is having a really animated conversation, while I walk beside her silently, it must look very odd but I forget, I'm so used to it grin
As we leave the house I automatically remind her not to be too loud if people are within earshot and it's "strange" subject matter. Gosh, the things we get used too!

siblingrivalry Thu 21-Aug-08 21:13:53

OMG, TR, our dd's sound spookily similar!
LOL at the walk to school -my dd does exactly the same but also runs slightly ahead of dd2 and me and sometimes 'flaps'.

DH found humour in it the other week (you have to, don't you?)
I was sitting on the garden bench reading a magazine and dd1 was running round a tree talking to herself and flicking her fingers. He said the funny thing was how totally unconcerned and unaware I was. grin
Of course, according to MIL, all kids do this hmm.

Seuss Thu 21-Aug-08 21:15:04

My ds1 (ASD) does this, with him though it it's usually acting out something he's seen on telly/computer - he doesn't usually seem stressed or worried whilst doing it and it has actually helped his speech a lot! I remember being quite a mutterer when I was young (no dx tho!) but that was usually talking through things if I was worried about something - (strange, shy child grin.

siblingrivalry Thu 21-Aug-08 21:33:31

Not that strange, Seuss, I remember doing the same myself at times hmm grin

Seuss Thu 21-Aug-08 21:36:40

Ah - that's two of us then - feel better now!

Tclanger Thu 21-Aug-08 21:36:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WedgiesMum Thu 21-Aug-08 21:40:01

DS does a lot of talking to himself and repeating things he has heard, more so when he is stressed. I tend to look at it in his case as a sort of developmental hangover from toddlerhood. Toddlers (having spotted it in my NT DD and other NT toddlers) say everything outloud just to process them, it's like sometimes the links in the brain haven't developed yet for them. I think with DS that sometimes he just can't access these processing links and has to say it out loud because he is thinking them and the only way to stop it going round in his head or stop it being too hard to process he has to say it out loud.

Does that sound like sense?? It makes sense to me but then I am notoriously easy to confuse grin!!!

Seuss Thu 21-Aug-08 21:43:51

Wedgiesmum - yes that makes sense, that's kind of how I felt when I was muttering because I was worried or stressed, it was like I could get things clearer if I said it out loud and then get on with other stuff.(As far as I know I am and was NT?!?)

Think that backs up TC's link as well...(again - easily confused!)

siblingrivalry Thu 21-Aug-08 21:49:15

Thanks for that link Tclanger - I am going to browse the rest of the site now!
This is something which seems to be more common than I realised and I agree with Kristen -it is a comfort that other kids are the same.
DD has done this since she was a toddler, but she never refers to it. She just calls it 'playing a game in her head' if I ask her about it (which I rarely do).
I find it quite sad that our children have so much going onin their heads at any one time. It must be draining for them -no wonder they have meltdowns sometimes. I think I would do the same.

How old is your ds?

Tclanger Thu 21-Aug-08 22:43:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

siblingrivalry Fri 22-Aug-08 12:54:40

What is the delayed echolia, Tclanger, if you don't mind me asking?
DD is having a really bad day - 2 tantrums so far and now she's in the playroom having a conversation with herself and running.

Pass the chocolate!smile
Hope you are having a good day.

knat Fri 22-Aug-08 15:31:46

yes my dd (4.9) asd (poss aspergers/hfa_ talks to herslef all the time - especially at bedtime. She can go to bed at7.00 and is still talking away at 9.00 and it is constant. It can be anything she's heard on telly/computer etc and she asks herself questions and answers herself etc. I quite like it although i wish it didn't keep her awake for so long!!!!!

Tclanger Fri 22-Aug-08 16:24:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Widemouthfrog Fri 22-Aug-08 17:01:54

My DS talks to himself constantly - it is like a stream of consiousness and you can see him working over new rules and routines to himself. He gets very angry if you interrupt him. He has echolalia too - especially if he hears a new word or phrase when he will mutter it over and over again as if he is rehearsing it.
I am so used to it I switch off now, and its only when someone he doesn't know tries to join in I realise he is doing it again. He will then get angry and say firmly 'just listen to me'.

siblingrivalry Fri 22-Aug-08 17:43:42

DD doesn't really have any kind of echolia,but she definitely talks about the things she has seen on the tellie/computer. I heard her doing different kinds of voices this afternoon - a 'conversation' which lasted over 45 minutes!smile

Tclanger, thanks for the link. I started to read the rest of your blog,but dd2 (3) wants to paint my toenails so will have to save it for later!

I'm reassured that dd1 isn't alone in this behaviour, but as it gets more frequent I have to admit to feeling a bit sad in case it is a sign that she is anxious or stressed.

bullet123 Fri 22-Aug-08 19:49:36

I still do this.

siblingrivalry Fri 22-Aug-08 20:22:53

Bullet, do you mean you talk to yourself?

I sometimes did as a child, but most of my conversations were played out in my head, IYKWIM.

Tclanger Fri 22-Aug-08 20:33:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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