School-ing options

[Mumofsend]

DD is 6 in year 1. Diagnosed ASD (with marked demand avoidance), ADHD, speech disorder, SPD, ?learning difficulties and ?language disorder.

She is really struggling where she is in mainstream but her 1-1 is truly lovely and she is very well cared for albeit she is not learning and she is essentially baby sat.


We have just had it agreed by the LA to consult with a PRB who want them roughly able to do 5050 mainstream/specialist. We aren't sure she can so we aren't sure they will agree they can meet need.

That leaves us with very limited options.

A) a MLD school who aren't keen/happy with PDA

B) a SEMH setting where should be one of 3 girls in the entire school and none in her class. She wouldn't cope with being the only girl, she is very set in her mind that she is a girl and what are girl things vs boy things.

C) a further SEMH setting with similar issue

D) the ASD school who won't touch PDA.

My ideal is the PRB as even though she would be the only girl in the PRB she would have girls in the mainstream section. It also provides academic learning for her. She is able to access academic learning.

If the PRB come back as a no I think the least worse option of the available schools would be the mainstream she is currently in with 1-1. Am I insane?

It is so difficult :(

[Ellie56]

Your child needs to learn, and to learn to the best of her ability.If she is not doing this at this school, however lovely the 1:1 is, that is not good enough.

If there are no schools suitable in your local area, look at what is available in neighbouring local authorities. I am assuming she has an EHC plan?

[Mumofsend]

That is definitely the issue. Schools keep saying the provision she needs she will be at risk in because of being a 6 year old girl, her specific needs and the nature of the needs of the other children.

Our LA has really weak specialist provision but there is a lot of cross over between ours and the one that surrounds us so I have looked at both. Anything further would be heading towards 2 hours travel.

She has an EHCP, we originally kept her in mainstream due to this issue and then the PRB opened so we called an early review to see if we could get her moved.

I don't know if there is scope for the PRB and LA to make a bit more of a bespoke provision for her within it as that seems the only viable provision but I don't know whether that would be possible.

[10brokengreenbottles]

If DD received better support in the PRB than she's currently receiving in MS do you think she could build up to 50/50? Are there any other PRBs, either in your LA or out of area within travelling distance?

The problem with staying in MS is DD's difficulties and the social and emotional gap between her and peers will only increase as she gets older. Mainstream isn't working now, that will only become more noticeable. How much is DD really getting out of school at the moment?

I don't think the SEMH schools will work. DD needs a peer group with at least a few girls. Are the other girls similar ages?

Are there any other SS within travelling distance - independent, non-maintained, out of area? Will there be more options in the next couple of years?

Have you considered an EOTAS package?

[10brokengreenbottles]

Sorry X-posted.

I see other provision is limited. A more bespoke offer is possible, but, as with anything, you will have to push for it.

[Mumofsend]

@10brokengreenbottles

She probably could build up to 5050 provided they accept that there are certain bits she can't manage and don't continually try to force those bits. She could certainly manage 40% as she loves some of the wider curriculum areas. She just can't manage reading/writing/literacy and is suspected to be quite severely dyslexic.

There is another PRB but it is closing in August, our authority seem to really not like them! We have more options in general once she hits year 3.

The main SEMH school both girls are in the opposite end of the school. If she was a child who was comfortable being in a boy dominated environment it wouldn't be an issue. Her plan references that she is seen to be fearful of the boys/male staff and her environment needs to promote feelings of safety. She wouldn't cope in an environment with lots of boys showing challenging behaviour. An independent specialist school I spoke to as soon as they saw those references they said absolutely not to SEMH settings at her age.

I'm not entirely sure whether I could manage her home to do an EOTAS package.

School think she actually needs a speech and language provision but the nearest is 2.5 hours and 3 counties away.

[10brokengreenbottles]

If DD could manage at least 40% then I don't see any reason not to admit her. You may find the fact DD can do the wider curriculum helpful. Usually literacy is within the base. When we were looking at SEMH ARPs for DS1 none of them worked because they were all set on doing maths and English in the base and afternoons in MS. When DS1 would be better with maths and English in MS but couldn't cope with the creative, less structured afternoons. If you think the SRB could work fight for it.

wouldn't cope in an environment with lots of boys showing challenging behaviour
This is part of our problem and why DS1 has an EOTAS package. Everyone is in agreement he is too vulnerable to be around high (or even moderate) levels of challenging behaviour. There are SEMH schools around for vulnerable DC but none that are suitable for DS1, and obviously that doesn't help you if none are near you.

For us, EOTAS is the last resort. It is exhausting, it isn't perfect but is far better than DS1's experience in MS.