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who has school/home books so the Teachers can write down what your child has done?

(38 Posts)
anniebear Sat 22-Sep-07 20:40:51

Are they important to you?

I only ask as I love to look in DD's each day after school (SN) to see what she has done

she has speech but is not able to remember what she has done through the day unless I know what she's done then I can chat to her about it

I find it is nice for me to be able to do this and important for DD

But it is getting filled in by the teachers less and less

I have mentioned it a couple of times but they just said they are sometimes busy

This week, they wrote on a Monday and thats it. I have written things to them , some important and I dont know if they have even been read

DD has being doing some sessions at MS school and been taken on the bus. I wrote down "Has she been ok going on the bus"?

No answer

I am being OTT?

Should I mention it yet again to the Teacher? Go to the Head?

I feel embarrassd though and awkard having to say about it again sad


anniebear Sat 22-Sep-07 20:44:41

Just realised "going to the Head" Might sound a bit extreme lol

But it is only a small school and I know her quite well, she has been really supportive to me smile

magsi Sat 22-Sep-07 21:17:25

My Ds1 used to have a home/school diary and I lived for reading it. He cannot talk so it was my only way of asking him about his school day. When it wasn't filled in I would be at a real loss as to what to ask him about his day. I would feel a bit let down actually. I think when the children cannot talk especially, it is your only means of knowing anything about their day. I too wrote things/questions which sometimes were unanswered. The trouble is, I imagine they are too busy sometimes to fill them in. Maybe you could write to the head not complaining, but just a little note saying that sometimes you are not sure if your notes go unread, as sometimes there is no reply. I don't think it is unreasonable to express your enjoyment in reading about your DD's day and how dissappointed you feel when there is nothing written. Maybe you could write that you and your DD read the diary together and it is a really important thing you do together as soon as she comes home and when there is nothing in it, DD seems a little upset. Blimey, its not too much to ask just to scribble one activity they did is it?

I remember sometimes it would not come home at mortified was I.

Good luck

anniebear Sat 22-Sep-07 21:35:46

Thanks smile

I have even told them before now that even DD asks for it when she gets home sometimes As she knows we chat a little about her day

All week I have just said "Sorry, nothing in it"

I am upset... as an SN School, surely they should know how important it is to us

DH even said he would ring the school if I wanted

I just dont like to cause any bother or have them thinking I am a pain in the bum!!

MissesF Sat 22-Sep-07 21:38:25

ours have a 'link book' and the only time anything is written in it is in response to me!

i feel it is a valuable tool...especially with 'unsuported mainstream' children as so much can happen during their day at school that impacts our time at home....and as they have no guaranteed 'named' person that i can refer to...the link book would be perfect.

i'd even be happy with a smile or a sad sticker etc to just give me a clue!!!!

MissesF Sat 22-Sep-07 21:39:41 i do wish it were written in by teachers when my sons have a meltdown at schooll...who knows i could even educate them as to what i think triggered it...and what i suggest they do!!!!

MissesF Sat 22-Sep-07 21:42:18

annie...just re-read your shock at a SN school not using it properly!!!
as a 'mainstream mum' one of the reasons i 'crave' a SN placement is that i thought there was more communication from school?

and i would have thought it were essential as the unit near us i am aware has many 'out of town kids' who are brought in by taxi.... so the parents don't ever get the chance to 'just have a chate with teacher'

2shoes Sat 22-Sep-07 21:44:42

in answer to the op . If they don't write in it I put a comment like"ih so dd didn't do anthing yesterday" I also tell them I am not happy. this happens more with the respit than school. this term the new teacher has done a class letter at the end of the week. which says what the class has been doing over the week. brilliant Idea and easier for her(I will be telling her this)
so keep on at them. your dd can't tell you They MUST.

magsi Sat 22-Sep-07 21:46:23

O.k, ive been thinking about this. It is a home/school diary and the parent's only link to an appropriate discussion about their Dc's day. You can forgive the odd unwritten entry, but not 4 days worth for heavens sake. I think it is absolutely within your right to bring this to the teachers attention (maybe try this before the Head). If I were you I would write a little sealed note for the teacher about how you feel. Firstly I would big-up how lovely it is and terribly important to you to read about your Dd's day and it is a special time for you and Dd when you read it together. Then I would say how upset you feel (as much as you appreciate how busy they are) when there is no entry. Then say that you are not sure if, at all, your comments are being read.

See how you go.

anniebear Sat 22-Sep-07 21:50:41

I did put on Thursday "has DD had a good couple of days"

Hint Hint!!!!!

No answer

Another I wrote to tell tham that we would be away for the day/Night and gave them my Mums mobile in case they needed to contact us

No answer

Dont even know if they read it

they have a letter like yours 2shoes saying what they have done that week but the ranges of disabilities is so vast that I know DD will be doing many different things to a lot of the children, so really, so a small newsletter doesnt tell me much at all

and I cant talk to DD on a friday about what she has done all week

Is really getting to me and annoying me as each day I open her book and this week particulary it is just all my messages

anniebear Sat 22-Sep-07 21:53:15

Thanks magsi {smile]

Just been thinking, DD has been going to Mainstream 4 afternoons after lunch since we went back to school a few weeks ago

so it is probably harder for them to remember to do DD's before lunch

So maybe (another) word with them might just remind them

I end up going all red , feeling sick and I end up apologising to them for mentioning it!!!

magsi Sat 22-Sep-07 22:01:57

Be strong, don't feel you need to apologise at all. You are not asking them to do anything extra than they are supposed to do anyway. Just be tactful and nice about it which I am sure you would be. Is there anyway dd's mainstream could also write a bit about her afternoons? My Ds1 has just started full-time at ms but used to do a split placement. I managed to get the ms school to do a home diary aswell, even if it was just a quick scribble. I know its hard when you are not a pushy person anyway (rather like myself), but I think if you don't ask in this world, you certainly won't get wink.

Joggeroo Sat 22-Sep-07 22:36:53

Our DS's home school diary is so important to us and the first thing we do when DS gets off the bus is have a look and a chat, It's a standing joke between us and the school that we fill up lots of books over the year. It was mentioned at DS annual review so I guess the importance is minuted. Writing in it in the morning is DH's job and his contribution to getting ready. I know others at the same school who don't really use theirs at all so I think it is part of the teachers knowing you.
I don't think you are being over the top, has your DD got new teachers. It sounds as though right now when she is doing some mainstream sessions it would be useful to have a contribution from at least one, ideally both so you can talk about her day together.
I have an article in a book Moondog recommended about visual structure which uses symbols-general sheet and then the teacher and child-maybe the child independantly in the long term circle what's happened. would be a quick way to record things once you got the sheet set up with appropriate symbols. whoops waffling, subject close to my heart too....

Joggeroo Sat 22-Sep-07 22:38:04

i say 'chat' , I read, he smiles or laughs.....

bullet123 Sat 22-Sep-07 22:53:50

Ds1 has a home -nursery book and it's the only way I have a chance of knowing what he's done that day.

cat64 Sat 22-Sep-07 22:58:54

Message withdrawn

anniebear Sun 23-Sep-07 10:40:13

She comes home from Mainstream with a whole page been written on what she has done by her 1-1 !!!!

she has started going on the bus 3 mornings a week, so those days it feels like she hasnt even been to her SN school sad

I am able to talk to DD about what she has done in the afternoon sessions at mainstream (she has a twin sister in the class so I get a bit of help some times lol) but not SN school which I think is sad

she has been going to SN School since she was 2 and 4 months! went into a new class in Sep 06 so has been in it for a year

I also appreciate that most children dont tell you what they have done at school!! (as DD has a twin!)

But at the same time, I know my other DD has done reading, numeracy in the mornings, I know she is doing well them and the afternoons at some point she will come out with bits of info

sometimes we have what we call 'family time' where we all tell each other what we have done that day (so I could find out about school lol)

But of course, 1 DD cant join in sad

thanks, at least I know it is important to others and I will be brave tomorrow and mention it for the third time!!!!

anniebear Sun 23-Sep-07 10:40:46

sorry, that was a bit long!

Christie Sun 23-Sep-07 11:38:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

It's all down to the LSA really.. DS has an excellent one, same for second year in a row and she writes essays in it.. and so do I.. and we have the same sense of humour so it's brilliant.

Y1's couldn't really be arsed and she when she did it was generally negative. DS's behaviour has got more challenging since then and although Mrs S tells it like it is, she is always quite to make much of the positive or funny things DS has done.

We are very lucky. I would go spare without this good commuication tool as DS goes to school on transport so I don't see them every day.

smurfet Sun 23-Sep-07 20:04:29

I'm lucky that my DD's SN school DO write in her home to school diary every day even if its only a short mesg,like you all say its important to know how their day has been!

thomcat Sun 23-Sep-07 20:15:09

Yes, we have one that is split into sections so I can see how she was at PE, reading, play, and in general.

Then I have a book where I write what wegot up to at the weekend so the teachers are a) aware and can b) chat to her about it.

Would have to have a word if it slipped with us as I don't have a clue without it and it's the first thing I go to after kissing her hello.

arena Sun 23-Sep-07 20:18:12

Hi my ds sn school not only write in the book, they also put photo's in there about 3 times a week so we can see what they are doing.

I think all sn school's should do that, as seeing the picture's makes such a different's, seeing my ds doing things that i think he could'nt do is great.

moondog Sun 23-Sep-07 21:01:43

In the schools (SN) I work in they are filled in every day.I always tell ask the teachers to let parents know that comments and anecdotes from their end are appreciated too,particulalry in the case of children with communication difficulties.

We also have picture diaries which go back and forth (parents have a set of relevant pictures) which are essential as they are the children's books to share with adults.

I always point out that written stuff is great but not accessible to non readers.

Saker Sun 23-Sep-07 22:30:47

This is interesting. Ds2 has just started at a new special school and they have supplied a home-school book and timetable but they don't write in every day. I guess they are busy but I am little disappointed when there is not information. I can extract some out of Ds2 (although proper RDI protocol does not allow it grin). What they do do though is print a general report on the whole classes' activity for the week plus a special bit about Ds2's week on the Friday.

Now I've read this thread I feel a bit more confident about asking them to write some more.

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