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NT but SN for behaviour reasons. Looking for suggestions how to help in a couple of ways

(10 Posts)
Mumfun Fri 20-Jul-07 21:23:16


Im looking for suggestions as to how to help DS 3.7 improve his behaviour in a couple of areas.

He has been put on special needs register by state nursery due to challenging behaviour since he started nursery. We have worked closely with them and his behaviour has improved a lot. We are lucky - the nursery are very good. In a nutshell his behaviour has been very disruptive. He hasnt wanted to do what they say at all. He still does things like drawing on furniture, eating playdoh,poking things in other childrens faces.

One of the biggest problems is that he frequently makes lots of inappropriate noises especially when he runs round - often just as if he was meaning to run round and spit in other children's faces. The problem with this is that he has alienated other children in his class by this. He has been invited to no parties, playdates except one yesterday (very kind mum).He seems to have a real problem relating to other children and playing with them. School really emphasize this and I can see what they mean. But he does love the other children, talks about them. He is good at talking to adults. Fortunately we have a lot of non school friends a lot of which he has known from birth. It does not seem to matter as much with them but I have noticed him annoy a couple of them in the past few weeks in that they turned round and stopped playing with him.

There will be a big changeover in September where a lot of new children join the class. I would like to help him relate better to the other children and not be again the child they dont want to play with!

So have you any suggestions how I get DS

: To not make all these noises when running around. He especially want to spit and blow raspberries a lot. Even when told repeatedly and given incentives he will not stop.

: stop poking things in other kids faces. He just will not understand that this annoys them big time. He gets excited about shaking things and it seems connected with this

I hope it is ok to post on this board as he is NT.I would appreciate any help.

frascati Fri 20-Jul-07 21:37:49

Sorry that you are going through this.

Have you thought about getting your son's behaviour assessed by a professional? If he is having difficulties mixing with other children I would want to get any kind of sn type thing ruled out. I guess until you know that it's hard to know exactly what to do and how to deal with it iykwim.

Good luck!

mymatemax Fri 20-Jul-07 21:43:02

HI Mumfun,
Was your ds formally assessed by any professionals, maybe a developmental paed before he was entered on the sn register, if not perhaps they may be able to identify any underlying cause & offer some guidance.
If he is on the sn register can the SENCO offer any advice?

They all develop at different stages & it may just be a case of your ds's social maturity lagging behind a little.

Sorry not much help I know just a couple of thoughts.

Mumfun Fri 20-Jul-07 21:55:52


Thanks for replies. I didnt want to put too much information before.

He hasnt been seen by anyone professional. The issues have only really arisen in the last 2 terms since he started school. He is due to be seen by an Ed Psych in September which the school have proactively arranged.

I have decided to wait for that before doing anything else. I did approach a good recommended professional for help but they were too busy with NHS clients (fair enough)

I just would love to able to get him off on a better footing in September.

mymatemax Fri 20-Jul-07 22:06:49

It sounds like the school is on the ball & an Ed Psych should be able to offer some advice.

How is he at home? Is it only with other children that he seems to struggle? Does he generally have a good understanding of simple instructions?

mymatemax Fri 20-Jul-07 22:14:01

Sorry just re read my post & looks like i'm interrogating you

EscapeFrom Fri 20-Jul-07 22:18:23

MUmfun he sounds just like my ds1, but I have no answer for you because my ds1 is also labelled as NT - apart from his speech, which is moderately delayed. I hope he grows out of it - he probably will.

Have you tried removing him from the situation when he gets carried away? Has the playschool tried this?

EscapeFrom Fri 20-Jul-07 22:19:31

remember also that when he goes back in September there will be some younger children there, who are not only more tolerant of such behavioral quirks, but seem to love the 'big boys'#

Mumfun Sat 21-Jul-07 09:26:40

Hi Thanks

No problem re interrogation as that helps you help! He is fine in relating at home. He talks and communicates well and seems an intelligent child. He understands instructions very well. He does make the strange noises at home and shake things but not generally in our faces.

The school has removed him from the situation sometimes when he has behaved poorly.

It is a good point re him being a big boy to the younger ones but I dont think they will like being spat in the face either!

Just got a book today through the post i saw recommended elsewhere on here which I hope may help a bit.


Mumfun Tue 24-Jul-07 20:11:56

Bump if any one else has any ideas

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