I feel so low, exhausted and lonely

(8 Posts)
Blossom4538 Sun 17-Mar-19 22:13:05

Hi all,

Just that really. Dd has High Functioning Autism. H is amazing, I have just felt awful for a few months now.

I am on low dose Citalopram (anti depressant) and considering whether to increase. On 20mg currently. I just don’t know.

I feel we could all do with a break away over Easter, but haven’t even got the energy for you that.

I can tell H is starting to feel a little down and tired too.

I feel so sad.

OP’s posts: |
Nettleskeins Sun 17-Mar-19 22:54:37

Have you been given a blood test to check for a) Vitamin D deficiency (at its peak at the end of the winter if you aren't supplementing at least 1000 iu daily (25mcg tablet in pharmacies and supermarkets) b) underactive thyroid c) folate or iron deficiency.

I've a SN child and I had a) and b) undiagnosed for quite a few years (now been on thyroxine for 8 years) Vitamin D deficiency not properly monitored by me or GP, corrected again 2 years ago. Made a massive difference to my mood in late Feb/March two years ago.


Nettleskeins Sun 17-Mar-19 22:59:48

sometimes it can be a combination of things that bring us to our knees. I know that once I was dealing with ds2 and my other son who was going through a difficult time at secondary, a lot of self care and my own health issues went by the wayside, or I was fobbed off with the idea of counselling and ADs when I had a physical deficiency/ endocrinological imbalance. GPs are often in a hurry to assume that stress is the reason for low mood, and yes it can create physical responses but sometimes there are quite basic underlying factors wh ich are overlooked.

Nettleskeins Sun 17-Mar-19 23:03:44

I was offered Cipralex at one stage and didn't take it. I think it wasn't necessary for me, counselling really helped instead. A holiday sounds brilliant, I think it often gives space to think/self counsel/sunshine and that can be very healing.

dairymilkmonster Mon 18-Mar-19 17:59:15

Sending hugs.
I can totally empathise - currently off work with low mood, mainly triggered by coping with ds1. Hoping to get back relatively soon but I thought that last month then had a setback.
Ds1 has dyspraxia, dyslexia,sensory processing disorder and anxiety/panic attacks. He has been under paeds since birth as was a few weeks premature then had malabsorption from birth - 5yrs. No specific diagnosis for the malabsorption was found and then it gradually got better by itself. He is now almost 8. Paediatrician, his OT and SENCO strongly suspect mild end of ASD spectrum. I've been very resistant to lots more assessemnts, professionals etc as he finds it all so stressful but we may need to get a definite yay/nay for that label at some point.
Currently issues include massive anxiety, resistance to changes in routine, continence issues (vax machine = my best friend), social difficulties at times, poor sleep etc etc.
I am a doctor myself, as is my husband, and I especially feel pretty rubbish I can't manage all this. I take antidepressants and they definitely help. I also recently started therapy, which whilst expensive, is worth the investment if it makes me feel better.
- I would increase your citalopram or try a different antidepressant.
- Could you investigate having some therapy for yourself? Or if not, build me-time in the week?

Blossom4538 Mon 18-Mar-19 19:22:37

Thank you for your replies.

Huge hugs, it’s very draining isn’t it.

OP’s posts: |
Nettleskeins Mon 18-Mar-19 20:08:15

okay, both of you, I want to cheer you up.

Ds2 who has ASD, or HFA whatever you might call it, dyspraxia, sensory processing, dyslexia is currently out at a riotous West End Musical enjoying a long tube journey; yesterday he went to a UCL politics conference; he is doing 3 A levels.He has a group of 6 friends who seem to value his friendship and find him good fun/admire him, one dropped round a handmade card. He sleeps well, travels independently, does all self care without problems apart from occasionally bellowing down the stairs for his clean clothes. When he was 8 up until 13 he was very anxious, had continence issues till he was 11 (the end of Primary prom was a debacle) had screaming rages if his routines were not observed, refused to watch drama programmes only sport, hated his sibling, and holidays were a nightmare for two weeks just before school started again, as his tension levels rose. And no-one invited him round to play because he endlessly got upset about things/possessive. His sister found him a liability and weird.

It has all changed, and he is wonderful, funny, academically successful, a hardworker now that he has help in school to focus and break down instructions and doing 3 humanities (essay subjects) at A level. Maturity has allowed him to develop new skills and catch up with his peers. He has a close bond with his parents and siblings, although still a surly teenager at times. He still fits an autistic profile but living with him is immeasurably easier.

It will get better.

missfliss Tue 19-Mar-19 06:52:21

Thankyou Nettleskeins I needed to read that too.

I work FT, no family support - husband also FT. Our DS (7) has ASD ( High functioning again, whatever that means). He also has SpLD and sensory integration issues.

We are currently trying to work to stay afloat ( husband trying to get first teaching job post pgce but is supply teaching at mo), manage wrap-around childcare and battle with LA over his EHCP to get him to the right provision ( a local independent specialist school so they are reluctant to spend the £££).

It gets too much sometimes.

It's just bloody tough and feels like a battle to get through the days to the brief respite at weekends which are never enough.

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