Reception auties 2018/19 - thread 2

[openupmyeagereyes]

Thanks to LightTripper for the thread title. This is the continuation of the thread for parents and carers of dc with autism in their reception year at school. Please join us if you can or, if you have dc due to start reception in 2019, feel free to drop by and ask us questions.

Thread 1

[LightTripper]

Hello! Hopping on, strewing some tinsel around and wondering if it's too early to start the mulled wine...

[livpotter]

Me too. It's Never too early for mulled wine!

[Hurricane74]

Hello everyone, I am still here and lurking!! Hope your DCs are doing well in Reception so far. DS has totally exceeded my expectations and settled well and seems to really like his 1:1. Although he is still not very verbal he is showing interest in the other children and wanting to join in with their activities He is generally happy at home too which I think is a good sign. Sleep is a major problem for us at the moment though. Started on melatonin to help him drop off but now we have a lot of night waking. Last night 1.30-5am! Not easy. Look forward to hearing how everyone else is getting on xx

[livpotter]

So nice to hear from you again hurricane! Brilliant that your ds is doing so well at school! The sleeping sounds very challenging. Maybe it will get better over the holiday?

[openupmyeagereyes]

I agree, never too early for mulled wine!

Great to hear from you Hurricane. Glad to hear that your ds has exceeded your expectations. That is also true for us and, I think, most (all?) of us on the thread.

Light sorry your dd’s teacher is leaving, do you know who will be replacing her?

Non-stealth boast alert - ds has won the school’s maths whizz of the week trophy for his maths learning. I am so, so proud and a little emotional

[openupmyeagereyes]

Sorry Light, I saw that you do know. Glad dd likes her too.

Hurricane sorry sleeping is rubbish at the moment. It is, on and off, for us too. At the moment we are back to waking at 5-5:30 which is as good as it gets in this house really. Ds has taken to waking and getting into bed with us in the night sometimes. I have to say I quite like it but it does result in little sleep for dh and I, especially dh who ends up being kicked and pushed out of the way - ‘Daddy, move out of the way’! He has never liked sleeping with us until the last few weeks.

[danni0509]

Hi marking place. X

[danni0509]

Openup well done to ds what sort of maths does he do?

[openupmyeagereyes]

danni I don’t think he’s beyond the expected level in maths, I could be wrong. He’s done really well recently in counting and can now add small numbers together like 3+2 etc. He’s come on lots and I think the trophy reflects that. He’s been loving Numberblocks. I think they use the app at school and he has the blocks at home from the CBeebies magazine. They’ve really helped I think.

[livpotter]

That's brilliant open! I bet he's really pleased with himself.

[dimples76]

Thanks Open and congrats on your DS's mathematical success. My boy loves Numberblocks too.

Hurricane great to hear from you again and so pleased to hear that things are going well. Hope that the sleep improves soon.

My sister works in the Juniors of DS's school and the Reception classes did the Nativity show for the Juniors today (that's their 4th performance this week!) Any way she said that he did really well and at the end called out 'Bye everyone' and they called back 'Bye son's name' - I think he has certainly made his presence felt at school, the Juniors are in a separate building and playground, yet they all know him. I think he feels a really strong sense of belonging and community at school.

[livpotter]

That's so lovely dimples.

[openupmyeagereyes]

dimples that’s wonderful, sounds like he’s known and loved in the school

[openupmyeagereyes]

How are things going for everyone?

We have the last day of term tomorrow. Ds coped well with the school and class parties this afternoon. He’s had lots of cards (we sent them to the whole class, probably why) and he had a couple with lovely messages from girls he is friends with, I was very touched. The year 6 boy that he adores gave him a card and some sweets this morning, he is such a nice kid. Tomorrow we have a church service in the morning and a family assembly in the afternoon. It’s the first time dh will be going to them so hopefully ds will manage to come along too.

I hope you all enjoy the last day or so and that all nativities are going, or have gone, well. I can’t believe that the first term is over!

[openupmyeagereyes]

We need to try and work on gross and fine motor skills over the break to try and help with writing.

[danni0509]

We don't finish until Friday.

Ds has had lots of cards too, we sent to the whole class so may also be why, I asked for a class name list as wouldn't rely on my ds to tell me the names, i would be writing cards to half of paw patrol

I'm surprised though all the other children have wrote ds cards to him writing there own name etc I assumed a few would be able too but seems to be the whole class can, I obviously had to write ds cards, he can write the first letter of his name but it's usually back to front and takes me a long time to focus him to write it bless him, he also got a selection box from another child in his class which was really nice.

When he was off after his operation in November they made him a card and all drew him pictures of aeroplanes as they know he loves aeroplanes & he sometimes gets a picture in his book bag that a little girl draws for him, they seem genuinely lovely kids in his class which is nice.

Had ds nhs salt appointment today. Can't be as positive about that I'm afraid.

He hasn't had salt since he was 2 & even then it was only 4 really shit 1 hour sessions then discharged, and since he started school in September they have referred him back and this was the assessment today, had to take him up to the hospital for it.

So salt did some games - flash cards first asking ds to name what she showed him, really basic like teddy, cup, spoon, bowl, flower etc etc he did ok with this as he's really good labelling you see.

Then she played another game which was items on a table, teddy, plastic banana, cup, spoon, pink plate, blue plate etc and she asked him to feed the teddy the banana & could he put the spoon on the pink plate and could he make the teddy jump on the table etc he also did fine with this, its these sorts of games I've worked endlessly on to increase his understanding do you know because salt haven't given me any help over the years and I've had to do it all by myself!

So speech therapist concluded that my ds receptive language isn't far away from being age appropriate so because he could put a spoon on a pink plate and make a teddy jump on a table he's suddenly got the comprehension of a 5yr old???

Yet ask him his name or his age or what he's done at school today and your met with a squeal and a flap or a blank stare because he doesn't have a clue what your talking about.

She's so far off the mark it's unfuckingbelievable! He's been assessed by school were he goes every day as having the understanding of a 2 year old.

So she said he doesn't qualify for speech sessions since he can talk,

that's ok then but 90% of his language is memorised phrases and repetitive speech, would hardly say he can talk.

He still doesn't ask or answer questions & usually speaks in 1 or 2 words rather than sentences and he doesn't actually communicate anything to you! He talks at you not to you, all very bizarre is my ds speech and no way near age appropriate.

I disagreed obviously & she said his speech was more a 3yr old level and his understanding was 4 year old level, still don't agree at all. NT 4 year olds I know blow my mind with what they understand!

Nhs for you, diagnosed with moderate to severe autism age 3 and at age 5 still no fucking therapy!

Early interventions my arse.

The only people who try to help are school.

Sorry ranty post. Pissed off tonight!

[elliejjtiny]

Hi can I join in? Ds5 not officially diagnosed but we had his first community paeds appointment in june and we are still waiting for his follow up appointment. At the moment his only official diagnosis is speech delay and hypermobility.

He was a sheep in the reception/year 1/year 2 play which he loved as it was all singing and he loves that. Tomorrow he is a gift bearer in the reception/year 6 nativity so he goes on with the kings and carries one of their gifts for them.

[dimples76]

Welcome Ellie. We are still waiting for a diagnosis too.

Danni that speech appointment sounds v frustrating. At preschool my son's 1:1 was working on the different level instruction games often with a small group of other children - he actually became very good at it but I think it was quite formulaic.

We don't finish term til Friday. My son can only write the first letter of his name and refused to do that on Christmas cards. It is a bit depressing seeing cards from classmates who can.write their name and his. Open, Santa seems v focused on improving DS's motor skills!

I can't believe we only have 3 days of term left. I never thought I would see him walk happily into school chatting to other children and I'm feeling very lucky (apart from when I'm worrying about toileting, motor skills, lashing out etc.!) I have found these threads a real support - thank you everyone.

[danni0509]

What are you all doing with dc to improve motor?

[danni0509]

Hi Ellie x

[livpotter]

Hope your ds is having a good last day of term today open. It sounds like he's made some good friends.

That speech and language session does sound very frustrating danni.

It's so great your ds has settled in so well dimples.

Hi Ellie!

Ds had his nativity yesterday. He managed to stay in the room the whole time clinging like a monkey to his 1:1. Every time she tried to sing he would try and smother her mouth with his hand and when that didn't work he kept kissing and licking her! She is brilliant with him though.

I'm wondering if it might be worth getting him noise cancelling headphones for that kind of situation.

Ds breaks up on Friday and I can't wait to wind down for the holiday. This thread has been such a great support! Thanks everyone

[elliejjtiny]

Thankyou for the welcome. Ds's reception class have mostly had their Christmas cards written for them. Ds can't write his name at all although he will copy out some random letters if he is in the right frame of mind.

Danni sorry the salt appointment was rubbish. Ds had really good speech therapy every week at his sen preschool but the school salt has taken most of the term to get round to assessing him and then told me today that his speech was normal. She phoned me and asked me what my concerns were as she thought he was very sociable. I hate when they do that as my mind always goes blank so I just said that he was like his brother who is autistic. I felt that she just thought I was worrying about nothing.

On a positive note the nativity went well. Ds smiled and waved and stood where he was supposed to stand.

[Choccywoccyhooha]

Hello everyone, I am so glad to have find this thread. My suspected ASD daughter is in reception and is struggling immensely. Academically she is doing well, but in terms of social and emotional stuff she is drowning. She has been doing half days only but even that has been extremely stressful for her.
She can't cope at all with assemblies or other large gatherings at school - she couldn't cope with Nativity and started at home instead. She couldn't cope with the infant party either, and I had to take her to sit and read with me in the classroom. She's supposed to be in fulltime after Christmas but I'm very worried about her, but I need to get back to full-time work. School are really good, but I'm just not sure mainstream is right for her.

[dimples76]

Liv it sounds like your son's 1:1 is great - I think he did really well to stay in the room.

Danni we're mostly pretending to be different types of animals and crawling, hopping, slithering about. I have got him a scooter for Chistmas with a bell (one of his favourite things). Santa has got him more arts and craft stuff to try and motivate him with mark making.

What lovely gifts and messages Open

Choccy that sounds tough - mind you this time of year is a sensory child's nightmare. Does she have 1:1 support?

[Choccywoccyhooha]

She has 1:1 unofficially. The class has two TAs and one is with her at all times, so they scoop her up and take her out as soon as there are any signs of overwhelm.

She has started saying that she doesn't want Christmas, no presents, nothing. I don't know how to go about it really, as she has two brothers (8+9), one who is diagnosed ASD but presents very differently to DD. I am loathe to split the family at Christmas but I think she needs it to be quiet and low-key, whereas the boys want to see family, play games, etc.