My son

(11 Posts)
DifficultBoy Wed 01-Aug-18 07:26:59


I am hoping those with SN experience can point me in the right direction.

DS aged 10 and about to start his final year at primary school. Here are the issues:

1. EP confirmed he is 2 years behind in maths. He was in the 10th percentile or lower for all maths tests she did. No diagnosis as she wants to do further tests. Only maths tests have been done to date as that was identified as the main issue. We are waiting tor speak to the school about what to do next.

2. OT (we paid for this assessment) said he has sensory issues which I have to admit I don't fully understand but my own observations are the following : fussy eater. He doesn't like the taste of many food and very reluctant to try but starting to improve, will only wear long sleeve tops (even during the heat wave hmm) as he says he doesn't like the feeling of air on his arms, constantly putting things in his mouth, will sleep without the duvet when hot but only if there is a towel on top as he liked the weight.

3. His teacher suspects he has processing difficulties. She says he behaves well in class but very easily distracted and will look like he is listening but then not have a clue when they come to do the actual work. She also says he can't retain knowledge and transfer it, for example when learning something in maths he gets befuddled when the numbers change even if the actual technique remains the same.

4. When doing homework he takes ages, rushes through without reading properly and makes really silly mistakes. I am currently working on year 3 maths books and even that is a struggle.sad. He can't focus on anything for long enough or with enough depth.

5. He needs lots explaining to him where I would expect it to be obvious. Eg, during films etc. He can't follow sequential instructions easily and loses forms for school, forgets his PE kit etc.

6. His main issue is maths. He struggles with even the most basic arithmetic as he jumps numbers. Eg, yesterday he said 6+4=9 and didn't bat an eyelid until I asked him to look again. He struggles to remember his times tables despite the fact we have gone over them loads. His working memory appears pretty bad to my untrained eyes.

5. He reads well but only with a reading ruler. Without it he can't seem to keep on the line and jumps words. His spelling is OK but his handwriting is appalling. But he works very well with a computer.

6. Socially he is very good. Lots of friends and spends his days playing. He doesn't like computers so tends to play outside.

7. He talks constantly and most of it is nonsense. It's very testing. shock

8. When we are out he is well behaved in places like cafes but if we are in a line waiting he won't just stand next to me. He's constantly moving about and saying he's bored. Thanks goodness for pokemon on my phone! When walking down the road he had to climb on very wall and plays games where he can't touch the crack of the paving stone.

9. Emotionally he is OK at the moment but often has periods of being tearful and saying he's stupid.

10. On a brighter note, he likes writing stories on the computer (but not handwriting), he loves lego and will spend hours putting complex models together and he will happily watch films (superhero only) and quote scenes months later.

He just seems a bit contrary. He struggles with maths and appears to have slow processing and a poor working memory but yet when he likes something (lego) he is fine. confused

I am reading a book about slow processing and they say about 2/3rds of kids with slow processing have some other issue. I am wondering if he had Adhd although I wouldn't say he's that hyperactive. Does any of this ring a bell with any of you?

OP’s posts: |
LadysFingers Wed 01-Aug-18 08:55:25

Could be ADD? It seems to be a common misconception that then they cannot concentrate on anything! Not true - they can use hyper focus when it comes to their interests! DD can’t follow a film, book, instructions, any conversation.....BUT she can work for 12 hours on her interest! That makes her very successful at it!

However, if I were you, I’d seek a speech and language assessment too to find out if there are language problems, as part of the slow processing and auditory memory.

Bibesia Wed 01-Aug-18 13:57:11

How is he in terms of things like dealing with figurative language, e.g. "I must fly", "Raining cats and dogs", and understanding jokes, sarcasm etc?

lorisparkle Wed 01-Aug-18 14:12:29

When my ds was younger I had a list of difficulties he had, nothing really stood out but I had lots of concerns. I asked GP for a referral to a paediatrician. She was amazing, referred him to a variety of other professionals who all did a variety of tests. Eventually we got all the tests back which she looked at and made her diagnosis.

School was excellent and got the EP and advisory teaching service on board. We did have to pay for a full dyslexia assessment as our county does not like dyslexia at primary level!

I think there are many children with specific learning difficulties and often a mixture of more than one. These include autism, dyspraxia, dyslexia, dyscalcula, adhd, add, ocd, pda, auditory processing disorder, amongst others.

It sounds like your ds may have one or more of these specific learning difficulties. Unfortunately some are diagnosed by the health service and others by education. I would keep pushing and maybe get health as well as education looking at what might help.

DifficultBoy Wed 01-Aug-18 19:15:49

@Bibesia. He needs any figurative speech explaining but once that's done he understands it. If he heats or for the first time he takes it very literally.

lorisparkle so a visit to the GP might be needed?everything so far has been through the school or us paying privately. I don't quite understand whay a EP can and cannot diagnose.

I have to admit I've been a shite mother today sad. I just find him so wearing but adorable all at the same time. He is the most loving boy and so sweet. But I lost it earlier when I asked him for the 5th time to get the paper towel to clean his hamster cage out with. He was faffing about and I said "stop being so stupid and go and get the paper". And then had a massive go about how he had to listen and pay attention and how it's driving me crazy. He cried and said sorry for being so annoying sad. I really won't be winning parent of the year award any time soon. His fragile emotional health is a concern to me and then I go and do that shock

OP’s posts: |
lorisparkle Wed 01-Aug-18 19:41:46

Things like adhd, dyspraxia, and autism are considered medical conditions so would need a health professional to diagnose. Dyslexia and possibly dyscalcula are considered education conditions so would need an EP or other specialist. I am not sure were processing disorders fit in.

lorisparkle Wed 01-Aug-18 19:48:09

Pressed post too soon...

I find my ds1 infuriating, he is so ‘bright’ in some ways but utterly clueless in others! I have to admit I have lost patience on many occasions and said horrible things but I always apologise and tell him that I was wrong. No one is perfect, especially not hardworking parents!

Bibesia Thu 02-Aug-18 00:22:26

You need an EP to look at possibilities like dyslexia and dyscalculia. However, it does sound like it's worth asking for a referral to a paediatrician to run a few checks.

DifficultBoy Thu 02-Aug-18 06:24:34

Thank you. I hadn't even thought of a paed referral so will talk to my GP.

OP’s posts: |
tartanterror Thu 02-Aug-18 08:12:52

ADD/ADHD spring to mind with Dyscalculia.

Have a look at Doodlemaths and Doodlemaths Tables apps. My daughter was behind in maths with no confidence and this has really helped her. She’s catching up and motivated by the rewards and option to spend stars on her virtual pet. Not cheap but miles cheaper than a tutor .

Your son sounds like me when I was younger. I now work in STEM and use maths everyday. Stay positive and work to his strengths rather than focus on deficits. Xx

tartanterror Thu 02-Aug-18 08:16:08

Oh yes I’ll not be winning any awards for mother of the year anytime soon. But I’m just going with getting him dressed and wiping bum at 10 as otherwise the nagging gets us all down shock

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