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How would I find out if DD has traits of Asperger’s?

(6 Posts)
SexNamesRFab Fri 03-Nov-17 19:20:10

DD is 6yo, she is wonderful but can sometimes be incredibly challenging. She’s hot tempered and can get violent. I’ve been trying to understand what sparks this. I think she likes control and any threats to her feeling of control makes her stressed, panicked and therefore angry. Triggers include:

⁃getting dressed (very fussy about clothes, often fixates on one item which she’ll want to wear every single day)
⁃Needing to be listened to endlessly and exclusively (gets angry when poor DD1 tries to get my attention)
⁃Making choices (popping into the sweet shop for a treat is a NIGHTMARE)
⁃Being interrupted when arranging her things (Lego, playmobil etc often all need to be lined up or sorted out before we can leave the house)
⁃Mini obsessions (picking flowers from neighbours garden, collecting types of stones on the way to School etc)

She has never responded well to traditional discipline - being told off, sent to her room/naughty step etc. That kind of thing tends to make her more distressed so I’ve learnt it’s better to distract her until she’s calmer and then we’ll have a sensible conversation.

On the other hand she’s very socially successful - has little girls trailing after her, can wrap adults around her little finger and seems to be empathetic. I want to know as I want to do whatever I can to make family life calmer. She can get very upset and down on herself after an outburst.

sunshine99789 Fri 03-Nov-17 21:16:48

Gather as much info as possible and see your GP would be the first step, If you as a parent feel that something is 'off' its always worth checking with your GP. Be prepared for a fight and lots (and lots) of waiting.

Just going to throw this in here but have you checked out Pathalogical Demand Avoidance? as for a while I thought my dd had traits of aspergers, then found out about PDA and this just seemed to tick every box.

The only reason I mention this is my dd is also very hot tempered and thrives on control x

lottieandmia22 Sun 05-Nov-17 05:13:23

In girls the signs of AS can be really subtle. My 8 year old almost certainly has it. Can I recommend you get the book ‘Aspergirls’ by Rudy Simmone? It’s very good because it talks only about girls and women. Men and boys present differently.

lottieandmia22 Sun 05-Nov-17 05:16:12

I have Aspergers myself but I was a very passive child. The key is social interaction and communication and also imagination. My daughter fails the Sally Anne test in spite of a EP report which said she has good theory of mind (she doesn’t)

TheBoyWhoWouldntHoeCorn Sun 05-Nov-17 14:53:46

You might find this helpful OP

Waitingforsleep Mon 06-Nov-17 20:37:15

It's interesting Lottie you say about the key being social communication and imagination- would you mind expanding as this was the area my dd didn't fit with asd.
Long long story but have you considered ADHD? Have you looked at girls with ADHD?
My dd is 9 and sounds very similar to yours st 6. How is your dd socially? Theory of mind etc?

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