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Increasingly aggressive but otherwise high functioning 7 year old - what do I do now?

(4 Posts)
Ieatmypeaswithhoney Mon 20-Feb-17 18:07:05

My son is becoming increasingly aggressive at home and at school. He has an ASD diagnosis and a full time one to one LSA funded through his EHCP.

He has been excluded 4 or 5 times now for aggression - today he punched his LSA in the nose so hard they thought it might be broken, then laughed and celebrated having scored a "direct hit".

He is at a mainstream school and did really well there in reception and Year one, albeit with a lot of support.

He is intelligent and has no learning disabilities, but we just can't manage his aggression which is sometimes impulsive but seemingly becoming more controlled. There is no obvious trigger - anything can set him off, and sometimes it seems like he can't resist the impulse to punch / hit even if he is otherwise calm.

I don't know where to go next. Does anyone have any similar experiences? I have quite a few friends with children with ASD diagnoses, but no one with the same issues with violence / aggression. I am struggling to see where we are going to end up.

Thanks very much.

Allthewaves Mon 20-Feb-17 21:33:34

Could he have adhd too

knittingwithnettles Mon 20-Feb-17 22:45:31

What appears to be glee is in fact his anxiety "released".

He is almost certainly anxious about various things and that is triggering off these violent outbursts. Reduce the triggers, allow him to talk about his anxiety, find other ways of letting him release tension when he is angry upset tense (pummelling cushion, throwing balls into a basket, heavy work, lifting bags, piles of books, sorting things out into piles) Is he upset if he is given things to do which he feels he is not good enough at..writing tasks, or people don't understand how he feels in some situation? Could be a sort of suppressed frustration at being in the care of the LSA even, or a touch he doesn't want.

He laughs not because he is being malicious but because sometimes laughter is a stress response to something overwhelming, ie: fact that he has just hit an adult. He might be scared of her response, of his own response even if he appears gleeful.

knittingwithnettles Mon 20-Feb-17 22:48:10

I find people (and I include myself in this) get anxious when they are not sure what is happening next, OR if what is happening next is something they know they won't like. Is it worth talking him through his day a bit more delibarately so he knows exactly what is happening next at any point...you might need to overdo it to start with. You could ask the LSA to do the same.

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