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Zzzz and poltergoose - URGENT advice needed

(18 Posts)
Usernamealreadyexists Tue 17-Jan-17 15:48:39

Hello

My 5 year old has HFA. He is easily misunderstood and has been struggling socially quite a bit. He is in an independent school. I had an urgent meeting with the Head following an awful incident where two boys spat at ds. He just called to say that someone will be observing the class tomorrow for an hour and could I sign the consent form. There are benefits of this observation as I think it would benefit my son if it helps to increase understanding. Is there anything I need to be wary of before I sign it. Turns out it's an Ed Psych. She will give feedback to staff who are receiving some training on autism (I think).

PolterGoose Tue 17-Jan-17 19:24:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

zzzzz Tue 17-Jan-17 20:45:19

I'd agree happily but would want a copy of the EPs report and recommendations. Why have they sprung this on you though and how does it tie in with your son being spat at by other childrenconfused

Weird that being the victim has got HIM attention. Do not engage with victim blaming even in passing.

Usernamealreadyexists Tue 17-Jan-17 21:46:54

Poltergoose - apologies. I have asked for this post to be deleted. I get a lot of support from your and zzzz posts. I should have thought before posting.

Zzzz - there have been a number of incidents at school especially with lining up, personal space, the school not understanding ds or his needs. It's leading to a lot of frustration on all sides and damaging his self-esteem. I guess my worry is that they could use the report to say the school can't meet his needs.

zzzzz Tue 17-Jan-17 22:02:18

If they tolerate low level bullying they can't.

Megatherium Wed 18-Jan-17 00:06:16

They don't actually need your consent if the EP is just observing, as he or she presumably won't be interacting directly with your child. I can't see any reason to say no.

zzzzz Wed 18-Jan-17 00:32:47

I think they DO need your consent if the EP is assessing your ds in any way, regardless of if they interact with him or not.

user1483945709 Wed 18-Jan-17 07:27:37

Is it just an observation or followed by an assessment too?

It is good EP practise to consult with parents too.

EP observation seems like a positive step

Megatherium Wed 18-Jan-17 07:56:12

There are often adults in classrooms for various purposes, e.g. Ousted inspectors, senior staff monitoring performance, governors etc, and permission from individual parents is not required for that. Therefore if an EP is simply sitting at the back of the room observing, permission isn't needed.

lougle Wed 18-Jan-17 08:18:16

Is the Ed Psych observing the classroom or observing your DS in the classroom? Quite a difference, I feel.

zzzzz Wed 18-Jan-17 10:39:17

I agree lougle. The permission isn't "you may interact with my child" (because obviously people interact with your child all the time at school), it's "you may assess my child", which if it is extra to normal teaching is something you can refuse.

Usernamealreadyexists Wed 18-Jan-17 21:23:17

Update - school asked a SLT to observe my son. I could cry because she is the first person who really understood him and how a lack of understanding of ASD has caused him a lot of frustration. She picked up on his many strengths but also his struggles. She saw first hand how some kids were winding him up. Finally, someone to speak up for him. I am very grateful to his Head who arranged for this. Thank you all for your input.

tartanterror Wed 18-Jan-17 21:37:26

What a relief for you - glad to hear of this positive step.

PolterGoose Wed 18-Jan-17 21:46:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Usernamealreadyexists Wed 18-Jan-17 22:27:42

Thanks both.

user1483945709 Thu 19-Jan-17 06:24:56

I hope SALT plans to write a report, with some recommendations?

youarenotkiddingme Thu 19-Jan-17 07:36:02

That sounds positive. Hopefully school will respond to recommendations since they sought the assessment!

Usernamealreadyexists Fri 20-Jan-17 12:01:12

I really hope so. She didn't hesitate in speaking up where the school was failing him e.g. Excluding him from the class reward system, other kids instigating him to react (I'd say there is some bullying going on), teachers not validating his feeings when something happened to him. He's a tricky little one because his expressive language is amazing but she picked up that he didn't always understand what was being asked of him, for example, she noticed he was being told off when the teacher said he needed to work independently. SLT asked him if he knew what she meant and he said no. She told the teacher it wasn't right to punish him for not understanding something. She also said that he's trying to play with other kids but is getting rejected because he doesn't understand what they are doing. I don't think school ever believes he was autistic because of his good eye contact and language but hopefully they will understand a bit more now.

I will update you with how my conversation with the Head goes.

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