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friendships (ours, not DC)

(7 Posts)
Coffeemachine Sat 30-Jan-16 18:20:11

NC recently. anyhow, does anybody else have this problem:

my old 'friends' with NT children have over the years reduced contact more and more (their DC struggle with Dd1 with severe ASD... always seems to end in a meltdown fest)... I barely see my childless friends from the pre-DC time. I am mostly too tired/skint/lack of childcare to meet up. I used to make some friends in the local SN groups but since DH is u well I had to return to work (sole breadwinner now) and cannot attend coffee mornings etc anymore. I am feeling totally isolated. My family lives overseas so I haven't got family support either I am finding this total social isolation increasingly difficult. I am either working, commuting or caring. but there is nothing else. surely I cannot be the only one. How do you cope?

You're not the only one. I could have written this. I think a lot of my friendships have fallen by the wayside due to how much I've had to change to accommodate DS and stop him getting overwhelmed and anxious or unmanageable. I also struggle massively with social stuff, more so since having children. It's hard. How do I cope? I don't know. I feel upset daily about friends I've lost contact with but I'm gradually making new friends here and there. My way of thinking now is take me warts and all or let's not bother. It's hard though, I don't know what the answer is probably pretend friends on the Internet thanks

Msqueen33 Sat 30-Jan-16 20:46:21

I'm in the same boat so I know how you feel. Two out of my three children have autism. People don't get it. Emotionally I'm exhausted and don't feel I have much to give anyone. The loneliness is horrible. Hugs xxx

zzzzz Sat 30-Jan-16 21:26:59

Me too. It's a fucker.

shazzarooney99 Sat 30-Jan-16 22:33:45

Lolgladitsnotjust me,my child even gets jealous of my other children and goes out of his way to make sure i cant spend any time with them.

Im always knackered, i have managed to get 2 n half days in work this week and not work since October because of him kicking off going to school, when i work i work with sen children so i dont get a break, i have been skint because i have not been in work this the last few days! and just totally drained, i have work collagues who ask me out and i say yes, but when it comes to the time he either kicks off or i am drained!

I have lost around 3 stone in weight with the stress and am beggining to look anorexic looking, which i dont like!

Lesley25 Sun 31-Jan-16 09:00:00

This is me too. i wish there was a solution. I've found a good coffee shop drive through and a magazine has been my substitute. I read and drink in the car. I can't get way laid with the washing/cleaning and I take the time it takes to finish my coffee and trashy read as my "me" time during school days. It's easier because I am self employed though.
I haven't found a solution to getting over my old pre children friends who let go. But realising that they made the choice and did me a huge favour helps.

SENMumoftwo Sun 31-Jan-16 11:39:40

My 'friends' also withered away. Pretty quickly actually.

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