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Anxieties and a strict teacher

(4 Posts)
gabbybaby Wed 21-Oct-15 12:30:36

My DD is in Y2. She has a lot of anxieties as well as undiagnosed learning difficulties (ed psych assessment coming up at some point this term). The senco is aware of her issues and for the most part, I have found her supportive. Senco and last year's teacher obviously gave the new teacher some background prior to the year starting. However, I'm feeling as though the teacher has very little understanding of the difficulties my DD is having. We had an issue last week when I spoke to the teacher to tell her my DD had been not sleeping due to worrying about a story they had to write, because she can't write more than a (illegible) sentence or two. Her teacher basically told me, she's in Y2 now, she needs to grow up and get over it. There are assessments coming up throughout the year and she'll just have to deal with it, and I need to trust that the teacher knows best. I was horrified, but so put on the spot (and on the edge of tears) that I didn't know what to say. In previous conversations with the senco, it's been suggested that she may not even sit the SATs at the end of the year, because as things stand now, she would be unable to access the papers (as she can't read and can barely write). I get the impression the teacher finds my daughter just a bit annoying! She is stubborn and defiant, and her teacher seems to think she is just choosing not to do the work out of stubbornness (hence she's being kept in at break times to finish off work that wasn't finished in lessons). I know that when my daughter refuses, she is anxious that she is unable to do it, but is unable to express to her teacher that she doesn't know what to do/can't put it on paper. So now I'm worried when the ed psych comes in, her teacher will tell the psych that my DD is stubborn and immature, but nothing else is wrong. In the meantime, I'm now fighting just to get my DD to school every day, as she's crying that she doesn't want to go, and we're not even at the first half term yet but her anxieties are getting noticeably worse. I don't really know whether I'm asking for advice or just ranting! I've spoken to the senco again today who said we need to have an urgent meeting together with the teacher to explain again about her anxieties, but I'm worried that a year with an unsupportive teacher is going to leave my daughter as a total emotional wreck by the end of the year. I don't know how to make things clearer to the teacher without getting off on the wrong footing with her, this early in the school year.

iwanttoscream Wed 21-Oct-15 12:54:48

Ask the senco, what tests will the Ed psych will be doing with your DD.
Surely the Ed psych will not be speaking to the teacher only.
They will probably watch your DD in class.
Does the school to better reading partnership?
As DD must be frustrated not being able to read.
Sometimes you just need to rant here, as it must be heart breaking seeing your DD so upset each day.
What a rubbish teacher.

gabbybaby Wed 21-Oct-15 13:11:40

Thank you iwanttoscream. The ed psych is being given all the background reports today to prepare for meeting her. I've been told she'll be meeting with me first, to understand my concerns (I'm concerned about more than her learning difficulties, but also her anxieties and behaviour at home), before observing and assessing her. Actually, it hasn't even been mentioned that she'll speak to the teacher, but I have to assume that it goes without saying she'll ask for the teachers impressions.
My DD has also been referred by the paediatrician for an ADOS assessment, but I'm assuming that will be a year or so away, so not holding my breath for that.
I'm not sure what the better reading partnership is, but she has booster reading 3 times a week, she's in a social stories group, and a motor skills group. She also has weekly (private) OT, who comes into school. I've been told she has additional interventions for handwriting. With all the interventions, I was really upset with the teacher's answer to me, that I have to just trust that she knows best and that DD has to just "get on with it, she's in Y2 now, she has to get used to constant assessments". I just feel like she needs to ease the pressure before DD reaches breaking point, and refuses to go to school at all.

iwanttoscream Wed 21-Oct-15 13:41:32

Brp or better reading partnership was used in my kids primary.
It gives 1 to1 reading help between 3/5 days a week for a couple of terms.
But at least the senco seems clued up.
Go armed with any reports ie i should imagine your DD must be on p levels / level 1
Year one level should be on her school report, if not ask senco.

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