First SALT assessment. what did you tell your DC?

[impulsiveboy]

Hi all

We've booked a private initial assessment at home with a SALT. I have no idea what to say to DS age 10 about it. Any suggestions?

He knows that we are concerned about his meltdowns and impulsive behaviour. But I don't want him to feel different or that he's "a problem" etc..

[ExtremelyStubbornAndSuspicious]

The truth

[impulsiveboy]

The truth?

Which one?

[impulsiveboy]

Thank you Poltergoose. That's helpful. I have talked to him about how he finds maths really easy but struggles with getting angry very quickly etc.. I will maybe say she's coming to help him work out ways of talking about what he needs instead of getting mad etc..

[ExtremelyStubbornAndSuspicious]

How many truths are there?

The truth in my DDs case = she was being assessed for ASD, so I explained what that meant and why she was being assessed.

She was only 7, so I kept it brief and simple - along the lines of everybody's brains are different, and this means everybody has things they're good at and things they struggle with. So DD is good at reading but struggles to control her temper, her friend is good at gymnastics but struggles with maths. And just like her friend gets extra help with maths in school, she needs help with making friends and managing her feelings better. And the assessment was going to find out what she struggles with most, and how to help her.

I felt it was important to be honest because I think my DD already felt different and maybe even "a problem" so I wanted to reassure her that none of her difficulties were her fault. Also both the SALT and the comm paed expected me to discuss DD's history and difficulties in her presence, which obviously wasn't very nice for DD. I felt she needed to understand what was happening, and I wanted to give her some reassurance that it wasn't because she'd done something wrong.

[impulsiveboy]

Yeah I can see that for your situation ExtremelyS&S. We're still a bit in denial shock about the idea that DS (and possibly the whole family ) might be something diagnosable.

Until a couple of weeks ago ds was just a pita sometimes and I was/am just a shit parent.

Some of those things might still be the case. I don't want to jump the gun with ds until I am sure we are definitely going down that route.

I'm still not convinced that I'm not just utterly neurotic...

[impulsiveboy]

Poltergoose, no he's in y5 now. We are doing private salt (ahead of appt with private paed at huge expense) and back on CAMHS list. If the salt says no issues, we may rethink the paed appt but stay on CAMHS list.

So hoping to work out what is going on before transition to secondary.

[youarekiddingme]

I agree about truth.

The way I explained it to DS was by saying I didn't like the fact he found things really difficult and got upset so we were all trying to help him. To do that we needed to look and find the hidden things he struggled with.
When he had asd assessment I explained they were looking at how his brain works. That they thought he may have autism that means his brain works really well with logic and numbers but the bit that helps him understand people doesn't work as well. That it will explain why he finds people wind him up so easily and gets so upset with them so quickly. I gave him some simple literature for children explaining what asd is.

DS read it and "that's me"

Good luck with it all.