How unusual is it for school to bring up potential problem?

[Dontstepinthecowpat]

DS1 is 7, P3. At parents evening (October) his teacher mentioned he was very difficult to asses, she couldn't give us an idea of what level he was working at, then mentioned support for learning. All of which we nodded along too, having no concerns overall.

Fast forward to now DS is receiving one morning a week one to one. I contacted the school to see if we could offer any further help at home and after eventually speaking with SFL teacher it clicked this was not to help him with maths/English but socially.

He has good understanding/communication on a one to one but loses any interest in a group setting or when working in pairs. I've actually noticed this at swimming lessons, he pays no attention whatsoever, eyes wandering everywhere and generally just doing his own thing.

How have I missed all this? He is a lovely natured boy, helps out at home, does his homework, plays with his siblings, can work a room in conversation, great eye contact. The SFL has no concerns re anxiety.

At school he hasn't really made friends but honestly doesn't seem bothered by this. He has a few habits like hand wringing and needing to always swing something in his hand. I understand it's causing issues at school but have no idea what path they are leading us down. Teacher has already mentioned looking for more input other than SFL

Thanks for reading this far.

bothered by this, his peers just aren't into the same things as him.

[Dontstepinthecowpat]

Sorry, Support for Learning teacher. I think that might be what they are hinting at although it really would blindside me having friends with DC with ASD and having stalked the MN Special needs boards for a couple of years due to DD's SN. She is almost 3, lots of issues no diagnosis.

He has lots of 'quirks'. I've probably been a bit difficult with the school as I took the 'we can't all be the same, let's let him develop at his own pace' stance'. It's taken me a few weeks to realise they are having difficulty teaching him other than in a one to one setting.

[TeenAndTween]

Have you looked into Dyspraxia at all? Better in 1-1, loses concentration in group setting (processing the different inputs?), sensory things? Probably not, but worth checking for other possible signs?