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advice for tomorrow please

(24 Posts)
reader108 Sun 11-Jan-15 21:13:31

Tribunal tomorrow to get my man assessed. Dreading it got a solicitor who has said she'll do all the talking if necessary however I feel she doesn't know my ds as well as I do. Ds is 9 in yr 4 has a dx of Aspergers.

Got a private Ed psch report but it's nearly 3 years old.

bjkmummy Sun 11-Jan-15 21:34:12

good luck - good you have someone to speak for you - do take a photo of him with you as the panel often ask if you have one, make sure you take some snacks/drinks with you as you often will end up sharing the coffee machine with the other side which isn't much fun. and wear layers as you can get quite hot

who have the LA got going?

Ineedmorepatience Sun 11-Jan-15 21:58:02

I have done 2 tribunals and a half one last week!

The panels I have met have been nice, they have been good at asking the right questions to tease out the knowledge that you have.

I wont say dont worry. But will be thinking about you flowers

reader108 Sun 11-Jan-15 21:58:29

Cheers plan to take snacks and drinks if I can face anything.

MeirAyaAlibi Sun 11-Jan-15 22:05:06

1) don't come across as angry (despite having every reason to be)
2) act like you respect the LA 'experts' (pretend you're tactfully pointing out big errors in your manager's report- during his meeting with the big boss)
3) be a mumsy and submissive-wife type (send your acid commentary, barbed questions and technical legal points on post-its to your rep)

I was told panels only like 1950s mothers but just couldn't bring myself to believe it. So I didn't do this. Twice. And we lost. Twice.

MeirAyaAlibi Sun 11-Jan-15 22:07:09

You'll probably win. It's hard for a LA to convincingly demonstrate a dc doesn't need assessing, without having assessed them.

senvet Sun 11-Jan-15 22:13:41

Sorry this is late.
If you want a chance to speak, ask your lawyer to let you have one. Especially if it is evidence about how your DC performs. The panel are likely to want to hear this from you anyway.

Actually, at a tribunal I helped my relative do, they went straight to her as the mum and asked her to say what it seemed like from her point of view.
She was totally unprepared for this, but gave a good explanation of her frustrations in getting things right.

So as that was unexpected, I now suggest people speak from the heart about their DCs strengths and weaknesses, and their hopes and fears for DC in the future. I am hearing that sometimes the Tribunals ask for it at the end.

If you are seeing this just before you go, don't worry: You know your child very well and could do a very good job of this kind of summary standing on your head - you have probably had to explain a dozen times to friends and family already.

Remember, when you will come out at the end of the Tribunal, you will always wonder if you should have said, X or avoided saying Y, but there is no perfect answer, and no perfect tribunal. If you have been totally frank about DCs strengths as well as weaknesses, you will have done as much as you can.

Lots of luck reader. Be thinking of you

Ineedmorepatience Sun 11-Jan-15 22:23:46

I agree with senvet

Try to speak if you can, you know your child so well, better than anyone else. Let them ask you questions and answer them from your heart! If you remember anything useful in the bundle refer to it!

And good luck flowers

reader108 Sun 11-Jan-15 23:05:35

Many Thanks. Solicitor said some ? 's maybe directed at me. Know I'm his best and only advocate however not sure I'll be up to it. We've called no witness's as 'masks' quite well at school.
Most reports seem to start it was a pleasure to meet ds in clinic today. He is an absolute pleasure but hard hard work. Feel like I spend SO much time and effort 'glueing' him back together all the time. He comes out of school running towards me like a 2year old everyone says what a greeting how wonderful. I just think here we go again he's ecstatic to be out of there, and with the one person who gets him! He's just 9, but looks about 12 nearly as big as me!

wasuup2014 Sun 11-Jan-15 23:43:29

Look up and print off the NAS info on different behaviours at home and school and the same kind of info from ASD specialist Luke Beardon.

Make a list of lack of progress not just academically but socially or with sensory needs or behaviour or speech and language and make sure that you have this evidence in the bundle nubered to hand.

The LA's favourite argument in these cases is that they can meet the needs from the money they devolve to school.

They need to have a clear picture of his needs though and without an assessment - have they?

Dress Smart Casual and be yourself.

You are there because you believe your son needs a statement he needs specialist/direct teaching.

How much is his current provision costing the LA - a full time untrained level one TA at minimum wage would still cost about 8 Grand a year? A specialist dyslexia/speech therapist for and hour or 2 a week for direct teaching you could be looking at 3K or more a year each.

If you think your son needs a special school say so and say way as he will need a statement to access it.

Fingers crossed for you smile

senvet Sun 11-Jan-15 23:54:18

There you go, if they ask for a summary of how you feel you can say this bit from your last post
"Most reports seem to start it was a pleasure to meet ds in clinic today. He is an absolute pleasure but hard hard work. Feel like I spend SO much time and effort 'glueing' him back together all the time. He comes out of school running towards me like a 2year old everyone says what a greeting how wonderful. I just think here we go again he's ecstatic to be out of there, and with the one person who gets him! "

Also, with a solicitor there, you become more a witness of fact ie the things you experience on a good day, on a bad day, the diffculties he has etc

Your solicitor take more the role of putting the arguments, so I like the idea of agreeing a post it note system when thoughts about the arguments occur.

Your solicitor may prefer you to note them oon your pad where she can see them at a glance, and check through them in a break (if you are on that long)

Really good luck

AgnesDiPesto Mon 12-Jan-15 00:09:41

Have real life egs.
Tribunals often ask for egs e.g. of behaviour problems etc
You are the only person who has these.
Esp as school don't see it.

You can draft a summing up statement during one of the breaks - doesn't have to be much, I agree speak from the heart.

Best of luck. Its q. nice to be in a room where people listen to you for a change.

PolterGoose Mon 12-Jan-15 06:30:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ineedmorepatience Mon 12-Jan-15 08:03:37

Good luck reader stay strong! grin

Tunna Mon 12-Jan-15 08:45:34

Good luck from me as well smile

sweetteamum Mon 12-Jan-15 10:52:57

Best of luck today flowers

2boysnamedR Mon 12-Jan-15 12:06:35

Sorry to see this so late - best of luck

My tips be friendly and smile to the la witness ( yes post it notes or scribble down your contempt when they p you off)

Be honest. Then your case can never fall apart. The la lied at mine, then they started bickering amount themselfs. Lies can out themselfs

senvet Mon 12-Jan-15 15:01:30

reader all fingers and toes crossed here

Ineedmorepatience Mon 12-Jan-15 20:33:43

Hope it went ok reader now you wait for the outcome flowers

reader108 Mon 12-Jan-15 21:17:35

Went 'ABSOLUTELY AWFULLY' will be amazed if ds gets assessed. Solicitor agreed so not my negativity. Chair got school to agree to put him in for OT sensory assessment and speech and language assessment. His 'snail like' progress is down to Asperger's! Tried so HARD really have nothing left to say

Ineedmorepatience Mon 12-Jan-15 21:21:49

Dont lose heart reader you never know what they will decide!

Be kind to yourself you did your best and no one can do more than that! flowers

senvet Tue 13-Jan-15 00:17:44

If the LA has to do OT and SALT,then that is both of the usual things on the medical-education side for an assessment, so the silver lining is that you have already come out winning something, and most folk have to wait for a decision before getting anything! Chalking up even a partial win on the day is rare....

So the only other things that the LA would have to do to complete the assessment is ed psych and school, (unless social services is relevant) which may still be in the Tribunal's mind even if they have given everyone a horrid time.

I know you need an assessment but it ain't over til its over.

2boysnamedR Tue 13-Jan-15 00:34:00

Nothing's decided yet.

Nothing is unchangeable. Even if it is a no, nothing stops you waiting and trying again.

If mines is a no then I sit back, wait, observe and go back

Everything crossed

MeirAyaAlibi Wed 14-Jan-15 23:23:00

angry

If you need a tribunal hearing to order it every time your dc needs any type of professional assessment... they're gonna be very busy

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